


His Demons

by GenKay



Series: His Demons [1]
Category: Cobra Kai (Web Series)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Play, Anal Sex, Angst, Beating, Child Abuse, Coming of Age, Corporal Punishment, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Manipulation, Ephebophilia, Extremely Dubious Consent, Extremely Underage, Fucked Up, Gang Rape, Grooming, Humiliation, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Masturbation, Mind Games, Oral Sex, Pedophilia, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Rimming, Sexual Abuse, Sexual Experimentation, Spanking, Triggers, Underage Sex, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Verbal Humiliation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-18
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:15:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 17
Words: 69,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24251191
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GenKay/pseuds/GenKay
Summary: A (very) dark look at Robby’s fucked up life through the ages.A/N: Okay - so this is turned out to be more than I was expecting. I was planning on doing vignettes from different ages, but after catching up to the present, it kept going on, becoming something lighter and more hopeful in the process. So I'm splitting it in two and continuing the story in a more positive sequel.But that one would stand on its own too, I hope. If this stuff is too dark for you, then you can skip it and go directly to the next one.
Relationships: Miguel Diaz/Robby Keene, Robby Keene/Original Character(s), Robby Keene/Others
Series: His Demons [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1767835
Comments: 42
Kudos: 117





	1. 4

**Author's Note:**

> There is a real lack of Robby-centric fics around here. So I decided to write some of my own. Some very dark stuff from my twisted mind. Gets progressively darker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And I mean really dark. For those of you here for some Robby/Miguel stuff (I know I usually am), you'll have to wait a while. But I'll make sure to tag it in the title.

“You don’t want to be a pussy, do you?”

Robby shook his vigorously. His dad was so cool. He knew everything.

“Good. Now make a fist. No – not like that. Thumb right there.” Johnny corrected his grip and held up his palm. “Now, punch as hard as you can.”

Robby swung his fist, putting his whole body behind it just like Johnny had told him to.

“Good boy.” Johnny smiled. “So what have you learned?”

“Big boys don’t cry.” Robby replied, proud of having remembered it.

“And…?”

“If Trevor calls me names again, punch him in the face.”

“Good boy.” Johnny said proudly, ruffling his hair.

* * *

The piece of tissue up his nose was already red and his cheek throbbed from the punch, but Robby didn’t mind. He’d done it – what Dad had told him to. He’d thrown the bigger boy to the ground and pummeled him into dirt. He’d made him cry. He couldn’t wait to tell Dad all about it.

But maybe Dad already knew because he looked surprised when he saw him and then smiled, nodding in approval.

“Dad, you won’t believe what happened. So Trevor came up to me…” Robby launched into his story but was interrupted by his Mom slamming her purse onto the table.

“Robby, go to your room.” She said sternly.

“In a minute, mom. So dad…”

“Robby! Now!” She said louder.

Something was wrong, Robby could tell, as he looked between them. Mom looked mad and Dad wasn’t smiling no more. He knew better than to disobey when they got like this. So he slunk back to his room, his high spirits from before receding fast.

No sooner than he had closed the door that the voices started. He couldn’t make out what they were saying, but the tone was unmistakably angry. He hated this. Hated it when they got like this. It gave him a bad queasy feeling in his tummy. And it was worse this time. It felt like he did when he had done something bad. Somehow, he knew they were fighting because of him.

“Robby, come on out here.” His mom called out finally.

It didn’t look good. Mom was standing in the kitchen, arms crossed and staring angrily at Dad. And Dad was at the table with his ‘bad Robby’ face on.

“Robby, your mom told me that you picked a fight with another kid?” Johnny asked.

Robby nodded, looking down at the floor, unsure of how to answer. He hadn’t picked the fight – Trevor had. He’d only done what Dad told him to. Why were they making him feel bad for that?

“You can’t do that anymore, okay?” Johnny said sternly. “You can’t go around punching other kids.”

“But you said…”

“Forget what I said. Listen to what I’m saying now.” Johnny looked at Shannon for a moment. “Fighting is wrong. You use your words, okay. Or go to a teacher. I don’t want to hear that you got into a fight ever again, okay?”

_It wasn’t fair. You told me to do it and I’m s’posed to listen to you. I only did what you told me to. Why are you making me feel bad for it?_ Robby wanted to cry. He wanted to yell and scream and stamp his feet and throw stuff until one of them picked him up and shushed him and made him feel all better again. But he knew better than to act out – especially when they were both already mad at him. So he swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded.


	2. 7

Brent was nice. He wasn’t like the others.

Ever since Dad had left to stay at his own place ( _you can come over anytime, Robby_ ), Mom had started bringing a lot of guys for sleepovers. Most of them were big, tough guys with rough voices who smelled of beer and cigarettes – kind of like Dad, actually, except Dad didn’t smoke and he wasn’t weird.

Brent wasn’t weird either. For one thing, he was pretty cool with Robby. A lot of guys freaked out when they saw him at breakfast next morning. They couldn’t get out of there fast enough. Others just tried to ignore his existence. Some tried to make awkward conversations with a lot of “oohs” and “awws” like he was retarded of something. But Brent had just been surprised and asked him if he belonged there. And then he’d just been nice. Normal.

It took some time, but in the end, Robby was glad that Brent had decided to stick around. Things were a lot better with him there. Mom didn’t get cross with him that often and he didn’t have to deal with strangers every other day. And Brent didn’t just ignore him whenever he was around. He didn’t just keep talking to Mom or stare at the TV, he actually listened. Even if Robby just talked about stupid stuff like school or what his dumb friend had said. He even took time to pick up Robby from school a couple of times so he wouldn’t have to walk home and he came to some of his soccer matches.

But the best thing was how Brent didn’t like it when Mom left him home alone when she went out. He was old enough to take care of himself, he knew that, but he still didn’t like being all alone. It had been fun at first – cereal for dinner, unlimited TV, no bedtime – but it had gotten boring fast with no one to talk to. Brent always made sure Mom got a sitter for him when they went out and sometimes, he even cancelled their plans to stay home with him.

And things got even better as he started to spend more and more time with them. It started with Brent carrying him back from the car after coming back after having ice-cream. He’d been too sleepy and Brent didn’t mind. He knew he was too old to be carried around like a baby – he was seven, after all – but he liked it all the same. Sometimes he’d just pretend to fall asleep in front of the TV just so Mom or Brent would carry him to bed.

It was all very comfortable and nice. Brent would ruffle his hair or rub his shoulders or pat him on the back for no reason at all. He’d often kiss him on the cheek or the top of his head in the morning and Robby liked that too. He’d play with him too – give him piggy-back rides, carry him under his arm or on his shoulders or just swing him around until Robby screamed with laughter.

Dad wouldn’t like it, Robby knew.

“All that hugs and kisses is for pussies.” Dad said. “Real men don’t do that touchy-feely shit. A firm handshake is all you need.”

Dad wouldn’t like it and that’s why Robby never told him. It wasn’t like he saw him that often anyway. Dad always had an excuse ready for why he couldn’t spend time with them. But Brent didn’t mind and he was nice and he liked spending time with Robby.

Which is why Robby didn’t understand what he did wrong here.

Mom had the night-shift at the diner that day and she’d forgotten to tell Brent. He’d come over with dinner and then decided to stay anyway to look after Robby. And they had a great time together, watching wrestling on TV and drinking beer like grown-up men. (Well, Brent had beer. Robby had to make do with juice).

When he woke up in the middle of the night, he didn’t see a problem with going to his Mom’s room. But Mom wasn’t there and Brent was – he’d forgotten that. Normally, he knew better than to interrupt their adult-time together, but Brent was alone too, so Robby simply climbed into the bed with him. _Brent wouldn’t mind,_ he thought, as he put his head on his chest and felt his big arm wrap around him and pull him closer.

Brent half-turned over, still asleep, his face nuzzling Robby’s hair. He slipped his arm under Robby’s t-shirt, while the other reached down stroking his leg. It felt nice, Robby thought. Closer than usual. He had never touched his bare skin before. But it felt good. So Robby threw his leg over his waist, pulling himself closer.

Then Brent’s hand moved under the waistband of his PJs and inside his underwear. Adults weren’t supposed to touch him like that, he knew that. Not down there and not like that. Robby froze, unsure. He should probably say something, but this was Brent and he was nice and Robby didn’t want to wake him up. Besides, it didn’t seem wrong. A little weird to be touched where no one had touched him before – but not wrong. Still comfortable.

Hands continued exploring his body as Brent started kissing his hair. His arm wrapped around his back and started squeezing his sides. The other hand pulled down his PJs and underwear down to his thighs and caressed his butt. Then the fingers dipped into the cleft and started stroking him down there. Robby clenched, starting to get afraid now. He wasn’t sure what to do or how to stop it. Or if he should. It didn’t hurt. It tickled a little, actually. It felt nice even though Robby new it wasn’t supposed to. Especially when Brent’s hand moved lower, between his legs, to a place Robby himself probably hadn’t touched before, expect to scratch.

And then it suddenly stopped. Brent got up violently, almost throwing Robby off the bed and groped for the light switch. Robby quickly pulled up his PJs. He didn’t Brent to see him in the embarrassing way like that.

“Robby? I thought -” Brent shook his head and rubbed his eyes, trying to shake off the cobwebs. “What the hell are you doing here? You should be in bed.”

That scared Robby even more. Brent had never raised his voice to him before.

“I-I’m sorry. I-I had a nightmare.” Robby lied.

“I don’t care.” Brent yelled. “Go back to your bed and stay there.”

Robby didn’t need to be told twice. He ran out of there, locked his door and stayed under the covers for hours before he fell asleep. Next morning, Brent was gone before he woke up.

“What do you mean it wasn’t working out?” Mom cried into the phone. “I thought they were working out great.”

Brent had broken up with her, she’d told him. He’d just told her that things were over between them and not even given her a proper explanation. She’d been trying to call him for hours for an answer, but Robby knew it was because of him. Because of what he did last night.

“You can’t handle a kid?” She screamed. “Bullshit, Brent. You are so great with Robby. I can see that. You really care about him.”

Robby shuffled awkwardly. He wasn’t sure he was supposed to be listening to this.

“But if you just give it some time…” Shannon tried. And then. “Well then go fuck yourself.”

She threw the phone down and broke down crying. Robby reached out to comfort her, even though he wasn’t sure he should. Not after what he’d done. But he went to her anyway and she drew him close, sobbing about shitty men and their shitty issues.

_I’m sorry, mom._ Robby thought. _I didn’t mean to mess things up for you. I don’t know what I did wrong._ That queasy, painful feeling in his stomach was back.


	3. 9.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Look away. Look away. Don't go down the rabbit hole of my depraved mind.

Cody wasn’t going to be around for long, Robby knew that already. He wasn’t Mom’s usual type. Someone with cash to spare, that is. Dad had called him a moocher and Mom had told him that he made it worth her while. Still, he seemed pretty dumb and Robby didn’t expect him to last long.

_A bloody useless hippie,_ Dad had said. Robby supposed he did look like a hippie should. He had long, wavy hair that came down to his shoulders. A short scruffy beard. He wasn’t really skinny, but he looked like he was – with all the big loose shirts he always wore. And all those colorful necklaces and bracelets. He always smelled like some weird incense or herb and he smoked something that made the house smell like too. And the food! God, the food. He was always convincing Mom to try out some weird vegan shit and Robby felt like he was on a diet of cardboard.

Still, Robby didn’t really mind him. He left Robby alone for most part. Sometimes it was like he didn’t even see him in the room. And Robby was more than happy to return the favor. He made mom happy and that was all that mattered for now. If he had to choke down some celery and beet-root stir-fry for a few weeks for that, then so be it. (Besides, Mom couldn’t take it either. Which is why she’d started sneaking in burgers and fries for them late at night).

Robby had fallen asleep on the couch that evening. Mom was off to work and Cody had shown up to cook dinner for them. Robby had ignored him and tried to focus on a book instead, but the stink from the mustard oil and whatever the guy was smoking made that impossible. Robby had opted for a quick nap instead – before he got a headache.

It was the sound of TV that woke him up. Not startled awake, more like a slow ascent into consciousness. The first thing he noticed was the sound – girls moaning and making other weird noises. He opened his eyes and saw that it was one of those sex channels, one where people did disgusting naked stuff all the time, one that he wasn’t allowed to watch. He quietly turned his head and saw Cody on the other couch, his shirt was completely open and his pants were down to his knees. He was pinching his nipple with his left hand, but it was his right one that caught Robby’s interest.

Robby had seen other dicks before. Other boys at school in the showers after gym class. Sometimes even on TV before his mom hurriedly changed the channel. But they were all different. They all hung down, for one thing, swinging or bouncing when people moved. And they were all smaller – much smaller. Cody’s dick looked big – bigger than he’d ever seen before. And it was standing up straight, pointing up as he lazily stroked it up and down. The head was shining and glistening like it was wet and the tip almost reached his belly-button, Robby noticed. It looked like – like –.

This one time a kid in his class had broken his finger. It had gotten all red and purple and swollen and twice as big as his other ones. It had been painful to even look at. Is that what had happened to Cody’s prick? It did look painful. But then why was he touching it? Robby was mesmerized by what was happening before his eyes.

Cody’s eyes locked with Robby’s and for a moment, it was like Robby didn’t even register in his glazed gaze. But then he jumped up with a shout, almost tripping over his undone pants.

“Jesus, kid.” He yelled, quickly covering his crotch with one of the throw-pillows. “Say something next time.”

He made a pretty comical figure – shirt wide open, pants sliding down to the ankles and a pillow covering the middle. Robby should be pointing and laughing, he thought. Like they’d done with the boy who’d been pantsed at school. But he was more curious than amused right now.

“What were you doing?” He asked.

“Uh – I was jerking off.” Cody replied. “You know what that is?”

Robby shook his head. He’d heard the phrase thrown around a couple of times, whispered by boys between giggled. But he’d never really connected any meaning to it.

“It’s like, playing with yourself.” Cody explained. “Are you old enough to do that?”

Robby shook his head at that too. Well he did play with himself sometimes – he didn’t have that many friends after all. But it looked nothing like this. And it didn’t look like fun.

“Why does your willy look like that?” Robby asked. He was more curious about that, he realized. His mind came up with a lot of questions when he thought about it. If it was that big, why didn’t it stick out in front of his pants? Is that why Cody wore those baggy khakis? And how did it pee with that thing? Wouldn’t it fly straight in his face?

“Like what?” Cody asked back, looking down in concern.

“You know – all big and red and -” Robby looked down again. Cody had moved the pillow, inspecting his junk more closely and Robby noticed it was different now. It was still big, but it was pointing down, more normal like. “It wasn’t like that before.” He said, surprised.

“Oh, you mean a hard-on?” Cody said, “Yeah, it gets like that sometimes.”

“What’s a hardon?” Robby was still curious. “Does it hurt? It looked like it hurt.”

Cody plopped back down on the couch, finally throwing away the pillow.

“Alright kid. C’mere.” He motioned Robby over. “See – this is kind of big boy stuff. Your prick gets all hard and big sometimes and it feels good. So you play with it a little and that feels good too. And then it goes back to being soft. You following me?”

Robby nodded, taking a closer look at him. Cody’s chest and stomach were smooth but there was a lot of hair around his crotch. Like a lot-lot. It started off a little from below his belly-button but it got dense like a jungle lower down. And it didn’t look like the hair on his head – it looked coarse, curly and prickly. He reached out to touch it and found out that it was actually pretty soft.

Cody sucked in his breath at the touch and his dick twitched. Robby drew back his hand in alarm, worried that he had done something wrong.

“Hey, no. It’s okay.” Cody reassured him. “You can touch it.”

Robby wondered about that. People were always talking about adults touching kids in all the wrong places, but no one ever said anything about the other way around. So it was probably okay, right? Gingerly, he extended his hand and touch the glistening tip. It felt wet and sticky and when he pulled his hand back, a thin strand stretched between his fingers and Cody’s dick.

“What’s that?” Robby asked, examining his fingers.

“It’s just stuff that comes out of it.” Cody replied.

“Like pee?” Robby sniffed at it. It didn’t smell like it.

“No – no. Different stuff. Good stuff.” Cody explained. “You can even eat it.”

That just seemed gross. Why would anyone eat something that came out from your prick? Still curious, Robby reached down to touch it again. He poked and pressed at it a little and it twitched again.

“Mmmmnngghhhh.” Cody moaned, his whole body shivering a little.

Suddenly, he grabbed Robby by his waist and pulled him forward. Robby stumbled and fell on top of him, putting his hands on Cody’s chest to steady himself. Cody pulled him in until Robby was on his thighs, straddling his lap. He looked at Robby with half-hooded eyes and there was something there – a kind of hunger – that made Robby feel nervous. But then Cody let go of his hips and moved his hands under Robby’s butt instead.

“Just do what you want, kid.” He said. “Go nuts.”

Robby thought about it, taking in the man before him. He felt a little scared and nervous – but there was no reason to, right? He wasn’t forcing him to do anything. He wasn’t even telling him. Robby could just get up and go back to his room. Maybe he should – but he wanted to know what all the fuss was about. He took another look at Cody. His head was thrown back, eyes closed, mouth half-open with soft, short breaths coming from him. Robby ran his hand down his chest, feeling the muscle under the skin. He could feel Cody’s heart pounding with his fingertips.

“Your hands are so soft.” Cody moaned.

That was a weird compliment, so Robby ignored it. Instead he chose to focus on his dick. He experimentally pressed it a couple of times and when it twitched, he grew more confident and took it in his hands. He kneaded it and moved it around a little, trying to get a look from different angles.

It was like clay-dough, he realized. Spongy and hard at the same time. No – it was more than that. It seemed alive, somehow. Like a slug – except, the opposite. It was kind of wet and sticky the same way, especially with more of that gooey stuff leaking from the tip. But it wasn’t squishy like one and snails shrink down when you touched them and this just grew bigger and harder. Pretty soon, it was standing up straight again, hard and pointing towards the ceiling. It was big enough that Robby could probably wrap both his hands around. So he tried that and it made Cody moan again.

He thought about how stiff it felt and wanted to try something. He put his thumb on the tip and pushed it downwards, slowly and first and then harder, until it was pointing down between his legs. Then he let go and it sprang back, slapping against Cody’s abs and leaving a smear of wet on in. Cody’s whole body jerked, his hands clenching around Robby’s butt. That was interesting, Robby thought. So he did it a couple of more times, bending it in different directions. Same reaction. Cody chuckled, opening his eyes for a moment to look at Robby before closing them again.

It was a game, Robby realized. That’s why they called it playing. It was kind of a cross between having a life-sized doll and a video-game. The dick was the joystick (Ha – he just got it). And the goal was to make Cody react. If he was just lying there, it meant you were losing. But every moan, every twitch, every shiver and every clenching of hands on his butt meant he was scoring points. Once he understood that then all that was left was figuring out how to play it. Moving the dick around only worked for a bit, he realized. The thing that seemed to work the best was wrapping his hand around it and moving it up and down. Slicking his hand with the gooey stuff seemed even better.

And he figured out that there were other buttons too. Sweat was shining under Cody’s lower lip, so Robby wiped it with his thumb. Cody took the chance to take his thumb into his mouth and sucked it – but that felt weird, so Robby didn’t do that again. He remembered Cody playing with his nipple, so he tried that as well. That got a reaction, so he did it again with the other one. Then he grabbed one and twisted it hard. That made Cody groan louder and his whole body tense up under Robby – but it looked painful so, he didn’t do that again. Other stuff – like poking his ribs, scratching his sides, tickling his underarms – seemed to work for a while before it stopped working.

Robby used both his hands to massage Cody’s prick for a while before he noticed that his ball-sack was pulsing as well. It seemed to tighten and loosen with every jerk. He hadn’t paid attention to that before, Robby realized. That was different too. Not just hairy and bigger, but kinda loose. He kept stroking the dick with one hand while he used the other to fondle and move around the balls a little.

“Yeah, yeah, right there. Do that.” Cody moaned. He was bucking his hips more and more now and Robby was worried he might throw him off. “Go lower.”

Robby remembered that place between his legs that Brent had touched and moved his hand lower. Cody hissed and spread his legs wider, giving Robby more access. Robby got the hint and massaged him there. His fingers reached lower and lower until it touched a bit of furled skin.

Something went wrong at that moment. Cody groaned loudly – louder than ever before – and his body arched up almost throwing Robby off. Robby had to grab his prick hard to avoid falling off. Then the thing came alive in his hand – pulsing and throbbing and jerking and _shooting_ something. The first spurt caught Robby by surprise, landing on his cheek. The next one on Cody’s chest. And then it started shooting everywhere. Robby lost count how many times it happened, but by the end, it was just weakly twitching, spilling more of that stuff on his hand.

Robby sat there, shocked, unable to move. What just happened? Cody wasn’t moving either but he taking deep breaths, so Robby knew he was still alive. And his dick was deflating in Robby’s hand – growing smaller and smaller - until it was soft and half the size it used to be. _Did I just break it?_

Cody finally opened his eyes and looked at him. And laughed.

“Don’t freak out kid. I told you this is supposed to happen.” He said. “Stuff comes out of it and then it goes soft and then you can play with it again some time later.”

Robby nodded, relieved. _So this was the stuff you could eat?_ He thought. Warily, he brought his hand up to his face, taking a sniff. Then he took a lick. It tasted kinda sweet and salty – a little like raw egg. Still, it was too gross to put it in his mouth, so he hurriedly wiped his hand on his pants.

“Well, that was fun, right?” Cody said, pulling Robby off of him. He didn’t wait for an answer. “Go get cleaned up, kid. Take a shower. Your mom will be home soon.”

Robby was heading back to his room, trying to process what had just happened when Cody added, “And kid, let’s keep this between just us guys, okay? Your mom doesn’t need to know about it. No one does.”

Robby nodded. That made sense. It was gross and embarrassing to talk about your private parts stuff with other people – especially your parents. Even the boys a sleepover only talked about this stuff in hushed whispers.

But still – now that it was over, Robby wasn’t sure how to feel about it. Cody never called him by his name, he realized. It was always “kid this” and “kid that”. Did he even know his name? Did that matter? Somehow, Robby thought it should. It also felt like he’d done something wrong – something that would hurt Mom – and it made the queasy feeling of guilt come back to his stomach. He also felt dirty somehow – but that was probably just the gooey white stuff all over him.

Once in the shower, Robby looked down at himself and examined his prick more closely. He didn’t have any hair down there, but that was supposed to come when he was older, he knew that. His balls were also small and very close to his body. And his dick was tiny – smaller than even his pinky. But thicker. He gave it a few experimental tugs. Nothing. Didn’t feel bad or good – it just felt like nothing at all. It certainly didn’t make him want to make the noises Cody had or move his body in that weird way. He shrugged and went back to washing himself.

He wasn’t going to do that again, he decided. Not with Cody, atleast. It was fun while it lasted, but it left a bad aftertaste in his mouth and the shameful, pukey feeling he was feeling now wasn’t worth it. It likely didn’t matter. Cody wasn’t going to be around for long anyways.

He turned out to be right about that atleast. One week later, his mom was telling him that Cody wouldn’t be coming around anymore. And then she laughed when Robby asked if it meant they could get some real food now. For a moment, he felt a twinge of guilt, wondering if he’d driven Cody away like he’d done with Brent. But that didn’t make sense. Cody had stuck around for a week afterwards and hadn’t said or tried anything.

“Honey, Cody didn’t say anything weird to you when he was here, did he?” Mom asked out of nowhere as few days later. “He didn’t touch you in any weird way, right?”

Robby felt his stomach drop at that question. It was a familiar, sinking feeling, but he didn’t let his face betray anything.

“No. We barely talked at all.” Robby shrugged. It was technically true. And Cody hadn’t touched him, he’d touched Cody. “Why?”

“Nothing. It’s just something weird he suggested before. Ughh…” Shannon physically shuddered. “It doesn’t matter. The creep’s gone now.”

Robby kept up a good front, but inside the familiar feeling was back again. _Cody wouldn’t have been around for long anyways, but atleast Mom could’ve had some more fun while he was there. But you just couldn’t have that, could you? You just had to mess it up too._


	4. 11.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What are you still doing here? It's too late for me. Save yourselves.

“Hello, Robby.”

“Hey there, Mr. Gay-Lord.”

His mouth tensed in anger.

“I’ve told you already, it’s a French name and it’s pronounced Guillard.”

“That’s what I said.” Robby smirked. The guy was too easy. “Gay-Lord.”

He could practically see a vein throb in his temple.

“It wasn’t funny the first ten times and it’s not funny now.” He replied. “If you are unable to pronounce my name, I’d prefer it if you called me by my first name. Pierre.”

Okay, maybe it wasn’t that funny, but Robby was eleven and this was the height of comedy for him. Besides, Pierre’s reaction made it worth it.

“Nah – I think Gay-Lord suits you better.”

He might’ve said more, but Shannon coming out of her room interrupted them. 

“Robby, behave yourself.” She snapped at him. “And Pierre, don’t let him get to you. You know that only encourages him.”

“The boy needs discipline.” Pierre said, shaking his head.

“And I need a fun night out in town.” Shannon replied. “Which one do you want to focus on now?”

Pierre smiled at that as he went in to kiss Shannon, Robby forgotten already. His mom turned around one last time before they went out the door.

“You good for dinner, honey?” She asked.

Robby shrugged. He’d gotten used to staying alone. He’d been doing it for ages now. Heating up leftovers was a regular thing for him now. He’d even learned how to cook some stuff.

“Great. Have fun. And don’t stay up too late.”

Robby rolled his eyes. He wondered why Pierre didn’t comment on that.

Mom had kind of upscaled her selection recently. She said it was time she found someone more stable. More mature. _Richer, you mean._ She said she wanted to find someone who could give them a good, decent life. Robby was skeptical about that. Didn’t she see that she needed a good guy, not a rich guy. These assholes were just using her. They were never going to settle down with her. Pierre was one of her worse decisions, in Robby’s opinion. He wasn’t just your typical snobbish rich asshole, he was the kind of snobbish, rich asshole who had an opinion on everything. And he especially had a very high opinion of himself.

The first time he’d come over, he’d tried to be pleasant enough, but Robby could see him wrinkling his nose in disgust at the place. And later he’d snidely asked if Robby couldn’t help out his mom more with cleaning up. That had been unfair. Robby did his chores. He did the dishes, took out the garbage, tidied up after himself. But what was he supposed to do about the peeling paint and the mold spots on the ceiling?

Things had only gotten worse from there. He’d seemed annoyingly interested in how Robby was doing in school and he had no end of suggestions about things he could do to improve his grades. Robby didn’t need that shit. He already knew he wasn’t smart enough to do well at school – he didn’t need people rubbing his face in it.

Then he had inquired about his extra-curriculars. And he’d been disappointed to learn that Robby had quit soccer last year, taking up skateboarding instead. Soccer was a meaningful sport, apparently. Something that might get Robby a scholarship in a good college. It wasn’t like his grades were going to do that. And skateboarding was for vandals and delinquents.

It seemed like there was nothing Robby could do right around him. Even if he was just watching his cartoons after finishing his homework, he was still rotting his brains. He should be reading books instead. Or studying ahead.

Two days ago, he’d gently asked Shannon if she’d ever considered boarding school for Robby. He’d been to a good one, apparently, and it’d done wonders for him with their strict curriculum and discipline. Mom had laughed him off, like she had with everything else – as if she had the money to afford it – but that had sent a chill through Robby. If Mom actually ended up with this guy, there was no way he’d let him stick around. He’d ship him off to some boarding school the first chance he got. Couldn’t mom see that? Or was she actually okay with the idea?

Robby almost wished he could introduce the guy to his dad. Johnny absolutely hated guys like him and Robby was sure that he’d pound him to the floor within five minutes of meeting him. But that was no good either. He hadn’t heard from dad for months now. He hadn’t even called him on his birthday.

So Robby had to settle for messing with the guy his own way. Playing “stupid” and deliberately misunderstanding what he said really seemed to get to him. And Robby loved it every time he saw his jaw twitch. And the name thing had been inspired. Hopefully, maybe, he could just annoy the guy into giving up. Or maybe that vein on his forehead would burst and he’d just die on the floor. Robby was good either way.

Mom was gone early next morning – Saturday morning shifts were a bitch. But it meant Robby could sleep in so he didn’t let it bother him too much. When he was ready for the day, he hoped that “Gay-Lord” would’ve had the decency to be gone.

No such luck. He was right there at the table, eating breakfast cereal and looking through his phone.

“You know, young men should make it a habit to rise early.” He said, looking up as Robby came into the kitchen. “It’s a good habit to develop for the future.”

Robby rolled his eyes. He was one to talk. Here he was at 11:30 in the morning sitting in someone else’s home in his t-shirt and boxers. Clearly, he hadn’t “risen early” either.

Robby ignored him and went to get some cereal for himself. Empty. The box was empty. He looked over at Pierre dipping his spoon in the bowl, then back at the box, then back to the bowl again. Robby could feel his temper rising. Pierre saw him looking over and scowled.

“You shouldn’t eat that stuff. It’ll rot your teeth.” He said. “Eat some vegetables instead. It’s healthier.”

Robby kept his temper in check. He wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. Instead, he put on his most obnoxious grin possible.

“Sure thing.” He said smugly. “You got any zucchini up your butt I could have, Mr. Gay-Lord.”

Pierre’s face twisted in rage as he threw the bowl of cereal at Robby’s head. Robby ducked out of instinct and stood rooted in place as the bowl clattered to the ground. A moment was all it took – Pierre was on him, grabbing him by the neck and dragging him to the couch.

“Leggo!” Robby cried weakly, too stunned to fight back.

“Disrespectful little shit!” He heard him hiss.

Pierre sat down on the couch and pulled Robby down across his lap. He yanked his shorts down roughly, exposing his ass to the cold air. He gave two hard slaps – one for each cheek – and leaned down closer to his ear.

“You. Will. Learn. To respect. Me.” He said, punctuating each word with another smack.

_What the hell?_ Robby was too shocked to register the pain. _Is he spanking me? Did people even do that anymore?_

“Let me GO!” He screamed. “Mom! Let go of me. MOOOM!”

“Mommy’s not here, little boy.” Pierre whispered in his ear.

Robby struggled. He tried to fight back. He bucked and he tried to kick out. He swung his arm back, trying to hit something with his elbow. He twisted his body, trying to find something to bite. But Pierre swung his other leg over his thighs, trapping him in place. He twisted both of his arms behind him and pinned his wrist to the small of his back with his left hand. He pressed down the elbow of the same hand to the back of his head so that Robby’s face was now pressed against the couch cushions and his screams were muffled. With his right, he caressed Robby’s butt almost tenderly.

“If nothing else, you will learn how to take punishment like a man today.”

Robby was scared. He had probably never been more scared in his life. Or more humiliated. Then the smacks started falling and with it came the pain. He screamed. He tried to squirm out of his grip. All to no avail. Pierre was relentless – the hits kept coming one after the other and all over the place. Not just his ass but also his sides and his back and his thighs. He could feel his whole backside heating up. He realized his balls were lodged uncomfortably against Pierre’s thigh and occasional slaps at the right angle seemed to squish them as well. He was crying, bawling his eyes out like a child, but the sound was too muffled for anyone outside to hear.

Pierre went on for an eternity. Long after Robby was done screaming and was reduced to a sobbing mess. Long after the hits stopped registering, his backside having gone numb by now. Robby had no idea how many smacks he had taken. A hundred? A thousand? When he finally stopped, Pierre was breathing hard too. Panting more like it. He finally took his elbow off Robby’s head and Robby came up for air, taking in a deep sobbing breath. But he wasn’t going to let Robby up just yet.

“Well?” He said in Robby’s ear. “Do you have something to say to me?”

Robby didn’t know where he found the courage. Or maybe he was as stupid as everyone said.

“Fuck you, Gay-Lord.”

Pierre seemed stunned for a moment. Then his hand fumbled back to Robby’s ass, diving into the cleft, searching for something. A finger was shoved deep inside Robby’s hole, roughly, dry.

“This is a trick they used at my old school.” He hissed, working in a second finger. “A punishment they saved only for the worst boys.”

Robby screamed. It hurt. It hurt worse than the spanking. It felt like he was being burned from the inside. Like he was being split in two. He bucked his hips with renewed vigor but there was still no escape. It just made Pierre hook and spread his fingers even more.

“I’M SORRY!” Robby yelled. “Pleasepleaseplease. It hurts. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry!”

With one last cruel twist of his fingers, Pierre pulled out. He released Robby’s hands and pushed him off his lap and onto the floor. Robby sat up quickly and scooted backwards, not even bothering to pull up his shorts until he was as far away from the man as possible.

“This was for your own good. I hope you learned something today.” He was standing over Robby with his arms crossed. “Go to your room and stay there until you are ready to have a better attitude.”

Robby ran back as fast as he could and locked the door behind him.

“You can’t stay here, Robby.” Johnny said, shaking his head sadly. “You have to go back to your mom’s.”

Robby’s heart sank. He had hoped – wished more like it…

“Please, dad.” He begged. “You don’t know what it’s like. With the new guy.”

It had been two weeks since the “incident” – that’s what Robby called it in his mind. He had behaved since then. He had tried to be nice and polite and quiet and he hadn’t talked back no matter what Pierre threw at him. He had been too scared to do anything else.

His mom had noticed and asked him if he was feeling alright.

“He’s fine.” Pierre had replied for him. “I just gave him a stern talk about the importance of respect.”

Shannon had looked skeptically at him but he was too afraid to do anything but nod. So she had accepted it. But that hadn’t been the end of it. She’d also noticed his discomfort whenever he sat down, how he shifted uncomfortably on his seat.

“It’s fine, mom.” He’d lied “I scraped my when I fell down from the skateboard.”

She’d buy that, he knew and she wouldn’t pry further. He was too old to have his mom tend to his boo-boos and she wouldn’t embarrass him further given the nature of the injury. So they just sat quietly and let Pierre lecture him on the evils of skateboarding.

Pierre hadn’t touched him since then – Robby had made sure not to give him a reason to. But the fear had been hell to live with. He had found himself nearly jumping out of his skin any time he came near him – his heart hammering hard enough to burst out of his chest. He had found himself waking up shaking at night, phantom fingers up his butt hurting almost as bad as the real thing.

He’d lasted two weeks like that – until this morning. Pierre had been lecturing him again and he couldn’t take it anymore.

“Dude, can you just not be an ass about it?” He’d pleaded.

Pierre hadn’t even bothered with the pretense of punishment this time. He’d just walked up to Robby and punched him in the stomach. And he’d left him there, curled up in a ball, coughing and retching. 

Robby had decided that Johnny was his only option then. His mom was too determined to make this work and Robby knew that if she did, this would be his life. He knew Johnny didn’t want him around – he’d made that perfectly clear – but maybe he’d care enough to let him stay for a while. Just until mom realized that she had to choose between him and Pierre. Or maybe Johnny might care enough to protect him. Kick Pierre’s ass and chase him away. Dads were supposed to do that kind of stuff, right?

“Look what he did to me.” Robby said, lifting his shirt and showing Johnny the newly forming bruise on his stomach.

Johnny’s face went very still and hard. He was angry, Robby could see that, but he wasn’t sure at whom

“Don’t worry. I’ll handle it.” Johnny said quietly.

Robby felt better about it for a while, until he found out that “handling it” meant calling his mom to pick him. He felt he could cry. Dad was going to send him back – back to Pierre.

But that was not the case. Johnny sent him to the bedroom when Shannon showed up so that he could talk to her. This wasn’t exactly better. Robby felt like he was back to being four again, listening to Mom and Dad fight with growing unease and feeling like it was all his fault. As usual, he couldn’t make out anything other than the tone. Until he finally heard Johnny yell.

“He’s not going anywhere until that asshole is gone. So either you get rid of him or I will.”

Things went quiet after that and a few moments later, Shannon came into the room.

“Honey, is it true?” She asked gently. “What he says Pierre did?”

Robby nodded.

“Can you show me?”

_She doesn’t believe me?_

He lifted his shirt a little to show her the bruise. He saw her mouth tense in anger and her eyes narrow. Then she put on a reassuring smile and stroked his cheek.

“You just stay here for a little while, okay?” She said. “I’ll deal with this, I promise.”

A few hours later, he was back home with reassurances from both his parents that Pierre was gone and was never coming back. But that didn’t make him feel any better. Any safer. He was still out there, somewhere. He might try to get back at him some day.

Why couldn’t his dad let him stay with him, even for a while? There were going to be others, he knew. Other Pierres. Why couldn’t he go and beat him up? He wanted Pierre to hurt, for him to be too scared to come near Robby again. And that would have sent a message to others as well. “Warning: The kid here has a badass dad who’ll kick your ass if you hurt him”. Was all Johnny’s talk about fighting all bullshit. Maybe Mom was right after all. Maybe he was a total loser after all. But atleast Pierre was gone and he guessed that was something.

Things were tense with Mom as well. Robby didn’t understand why, but for the next few days, Shannon was really standoffish with him. Like she was angry with him or like there was something she wanted to say, but couldn’t. Finally, Robby broke down and asked her if she was mad at him.

“I’m not mad, Robby.” She replied. “I’m just disappointed.”

She looked at his crestfallen face and rubbed his arm.

“You didn’t need to make me look bad in front of your father, you know?” She explained. “You could’ve just told me directly. I’d have handled it. You didn’t need to involve him.”

Robby was looking at his lap, willing the tears not to fall. He nodded.

“I just thought it was really important for you to make it work.” He said. “Like, more important than me.”

“Oh, honey. No.” She said. “It was for you that I wanted to make it work. For us, I mean.”

She pulled Robby close to her and went on.

“Listen, we do need someone like him to take care us, okay? But that’s not gonna work unless you learn to be nicer about it.” He looked up at her. “No – I’m not defending what he did. Not at all. It’s just – maybe if you’d been nicer to him, this wouldn’t have happened. Then maybe we could’ve made it work. So I really need you to be better about this in future, okay? Can you do that for me?”

Robby nodded. _Maybe Pierre was right after all. Maybe he should just learn to take it like a man._


	5. 8-11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still here? Okay, so this one is a little less fucked up. It also turned out longer than expected.

Robby didn’t have many friends. He’d never been the most popular guy around. And that was okay. He didn’t need to be. People always found a way to make you feel bad – even when they were trying to be nice. They were better off kept at a distance. Better off not knowing him too well.

He had learned that lesson pretty early in life. Most people were just pretending to be nice. They just said they wanted to help, but they didn’t actually want to. When they asked “How are you?” all they wanted to hear was “Fine”. When they asked “Is anything wrong?” all they wanted to hear was “It’s all good”. When they asked “Are your parents around?” all they wanted was to hear “Yeah, they are close” – even though he hadn’t seen his dad in months and his mom was off God knows where. They didn’t want answers that would make them feel bad because then they’d do something to make themselves feel better – but that was never going to be enough and that would make Robby feel bad.

It always came from pity, he realized and that pissed him off. There was no reason to pity him. It wasn’t like he was the only poor kid at school or one with single parent or a poor kid with a single parent. There were plenty of others who deserved their pity more.

Take Aaron, for example. He definitely had things worse than Robby. He was a black kid in his class. Robby knew enough about racism to know that he was going to have a tough life ahead. He had a single mom too and she worked two jobs. And he lived in an even worse neighborhood – a place where Robby wasn’t allowed to go because of gangs and drugs and stuff. But no one looked at Aaron that way. Aaron was at the top of his class – a straight A student. And he was great at soccer, the best in their team. He was always nice and polite to everyone and they all talked about what a great kid he was. Sure he always had an aunt or a grandma hanging around, but Shannon was doing her best for Robby too – so that evened out. All in all, he had it tougher, but all anyone had to say was what a great future he had ahead of him.

Robby knew he could never be Aaron and he didn’t want to be. Aaron was born smart and Robby wasn’t. He was nice and polite and everyone loved him for it whereas they found Robby’s attitude off-putting. He had that kind of dorky, nerdy charm and he was always so happy and excited about everything. And he was good at sports, which always helped make you popular. Robby couldn’t compete with the guy – nor did he want to. He was his own person and he had to deal with things his own way.

So Robby learned. And what he learned was that a smile was usually the best weapon. And not just one kind of smile; it was all about the right attitude to go with it. It helped you pull people closer, to get what you wanted from them while still keeping them at a distance and leave them happier at the same time. Everybody wins. He had his reserved half-smile that made people think he was shy so they wouldn’t pry much. He had his charming grin that made them think he was happy and everything was right with the world. He had his curious, “tell-me-more” smile that made conversations about them instead of him. He had his sympathetic smile that made them feel understood and happy. And if it came to worst, he had this obnoxious, smug grin that made people so annoyed that they left him alone. Little by little, he built his arsenal, his armor.

It worked very well for him. People liked him well enough – thought he was a nice kid. And even if they gave him those looks sometimes, they never pried any deeper because he never gave them any openings. People mostly just left him alone.

Mostly.

Some people still managed to get through. Mrs. Walker was one of them.

Robby didn’t have many friends, but that didn’t mean he didn’t have any. He had his friends from little league and some guys from school he played games with and even some girls he liked to talk to. Mark Walker was one of them. He was probably Robby’s best friend but that was only because there weren’t any better ones. They weren’t attached at the hip or anything. Robby didn’t share any secrets or details about his home life with him and Mark never cared enough to ask. He just wanted to hangout and play video-games and read comics. He thought Robby was cool and Robby thought the same and they got along pretty well.

Mrs. Walker though – she had been different. Mom had called her a nosy cow, but Robby didn’t mind. She had been their team’s soccer mom back when Robby played – she picked kids up and dropped them off for practice, she made snacks for the team, she took them out for victory celebrations, she even let them all hang out at her house afterwards.

She hadn’t paid much attention to Robby at first, but eventually Robby started noticing her noticing him. How he was always the last to leave. How he always took up any offers to stay for dinner. How he never had the newest shoes or the cleanest clothes. How it was always him who answered her calls, telling her that Mom had just stepped out for a bit.

She’d noticed, but she’d never made Robby feel bad. Even though he had caught her giving him that look sometimes, she always changed her face. And she never said anything mean about him or his mom – not even like those other ladies who said things that sounded nice, but their tones made it clear what they meant.

“He is such a sweet kid.” He’d heard her tell his mom once. “So helpful. He always helps clean up after dinner. That’s more than what my own kids ever offer to do. He’s very well brought-up.”

Robby had felt warm and proud at that. He hadn’t been sure what his bringing up had to do with it. It’s not like he did it out some goodness of his heart. He just liked being helpful, liked the kind smiles he got in return.

Mom had eventually grown to like her as well. She didn’t have many female friends – they were all jealous bitches who resented how hot she was, she’d said. But she’d liked Mrs Walker well enough. So when Mrs. Walker had started asking Robby over for sleepovers, Mom had been cool with it. It’d worked out well for everybody – Mom got to have her own sleepovers without having to tip-toe around, Robby liked having fresh, home-cooked meals and spending time with Mark, Mark enjoyed having his over too and the Walkers seemed to genuinely like him – even though Mark’s older sister was kinda mean and distant.

Robby had expected it to stop once he turned ten and the soccer team disbanded. The little league was for kids under ten, after all. But no – he was still welcome anytime. He was hesitant to abuse their generosity, but Mark was always calling him to hangout and Mrs. Walker was always inviting him to stay for dinner and Mom always agreed to any sleepover arrangements without asking him.

* * *

Their last sleepover was when they were eleven. Well, Mark was almost twelve, as he kept insisting, but it didn’t count until his actual birthday. They were supposed to be asleep already but they had the system all figured out. The sleepovers were usually on Fridays or Saturdays, so they didn’t have to worry about school the next day. The bedtime was 9:30 and one of Mark’s parents usually checked in at around 10 – so they knew to pretend to be asleep then. The parents went to bed then, doing whatever stuff they did and then did a final check at around 12 before actually going to sleep. Which meant Robby and Mark had two solid hours to do whatever they wanted. Mark’s sister had the room next to him, but she usually sneaked out as after 10, so as long as they were quiet enough, nobody was going to notice. They always shoved a towel under the door to hide the light and locked the door so that if anyone did change the pattern, they could just pretend that they were sleeping all along and they locked the door accidentally. It had all been Robby's idea and he'd felt like the devil corrupting Mark. Mark was such a mama's boy sometimes that Robby figured he could use a bit more fun in life.

Robby suspected once or twice that they weren’t actually getting away with it. Like when they accidentally got too loud. Or when he could hear Mr. Walker chuckle outside the door. But that wasn’t a theory he cared to test. They had two hours of fun times – reading comics, playing games, gossiping about their classmates, talking about sports and teachers and TV-shows. And _girls_. Nowadays, it was always about girls.

“I think I’ll ask Missy to the Spring Dance.” Mark said, a little too casually.

“She’s way out of your league, dude.” Robby smirked, never looking up from his comic.

Mark kicked him.

“Maybe I should do a promposal kind of thing.” He continued. “People do that nowadays, right? We could put it on Youtube.”

That sounded like a bad idea.

“Dude, just be cool, okay?” Robby said, looking up. “If she says no, you’ll be publicly humiliated. Trust me, not worth it. Just do something cool like flowers or balloons but not too much. Girls like that shit.”

Mark nodded.

“So are you gonna ask someone?” He asked.

Robby considered it. He supposed he liked April well enough. They’d been paired on a couple of projects and she was always nice. He still didn’t get that urge some boys seemed to have – the one to hold someone or kiss them or do any other stuff. He just wasn’t there yet. But he knew that wasn’t the answer Mark was looking for.

“April, maybe.”

“Meyers?” Mark said. “Dude, no. She’s never gonna put out.”

Robby scoffed. “Makes more of a challenge.”

This is how they talked, nowadays. All bragging and big lies backed up with nothing. It was a weird, contradictory thing. Everyone talked (lied) about stuff they did or were going to do. “Score with a girl”. “Go to second base”. “Get some action”. But nobody talked about the how – the specifics of what was happening to them. Acknowledging that somehow seemed to cross a line. Something that you were supposed to be embarrassed about. The “what” made you a legend instantly and the “how” made you a pariah.

No one talked about it, but it was still there, hanging over them all. The adults hemmed and hawed about the “talk” and “growing up”. And everyone was getting more self-conscious around the locker rooms. Switching to boxers. Stealing glances at each-other in shower to compare and then mercilessly mocking each-other for looking. Some of the guys were getting there, Robby had noticed. Growing taller. Their voices breaking (Mark’s had broken last month). Hair coming up in places. Some seemed embarrassed by it. Others proud. There was no rhyme or reason to it.

It was probably worse for him, Robby thought to himself. Unlike others, he actually knew what was coming. What to expect and how to deal with it. But the anticipation made it bad and for some reason, it still felt confusing. He already knew that he had more experience with this sex stuff than all the other boys put together - even the ones who were more “mature” and strutted around like cocks of the walk and he hated playing dumb. But somehow, he knew that no one would be throwing him any parades for the stuff he had done.

Mark was still making fun of him about April, he realized.

“… and then you’ll realize that it’s 30 years later and you still haven’t gone to the second base.”

“Yeah, maybe you are right.” Robby replied. “Maybe I should ask Missy instead.”

“Dick.” Mark said, throwing a pillow at him. Robby threw back the comic at him, which landed just short of his groin.

“Watch it, man.” Mark said.

“Ha!” Robby barked. “Guess I can just end you career before it even starts.”

That was a mistake. They were lying head-to-toe on the bed and Robby’s waist was right by Mark’s hand.

“Nut Check!” He “yelled” quietly. His hand darted out, slapping Robby right on the crotch with its back.

It was another one of those stupid games boys played, trying to get each-other’s nuts. And Robby knew how to play it. Mark had missed him completely, but he still grabbed his junk protectively and groaned.

“Hey, you okay Robby?” Mark asked, sitting up and moving closer. “Did I get you?”

_No. But I got you._ Robby thought as he struck out and hit Mark. He missed too, getting Mark’s thigh instead.

“Oh, it’s on.” Mark laughed.

They got off the bed and squared off. Mark had a few inches on him, having started growing faster a few weeks ago, but Robby knew he was quicker. Mark had the reach and Robby had the speed. They were leaning forward, circling each-others, trying to keep their waists out of the other’s reach. Mark struck first, but Robby darted sideways, using Mark’s motion to strike himself. He missed again, getting his leg instead. The danced this dance a few more times, neither landing the finishing blow. Then Mark grabbed Robby’s arm and pulled him forward. Robby was expecting that – he used the momentum to tackle Mark around the waist and they both fell on the bed with an oomph. They rolled around for a bit, struggling for dominance, arms and legs flailing and hitting nothing, until Mark managed to get Robby in a headlock.

“Give up.” He said, panting. “Give up and I’ll go easy on you.”

“Never.” Robby wheezed back.

He pushed at Mark’s side with all his strength and managed to slip out. Then he jumped on top of him, trying to grab his arms to pin them down, but Mark bucked hard, throwing Robby off. Robby fell face forward onto the pillows and Mark was on his back just as quickly. He pinned Robby’s shoulders to the mattress and climbed on top of his back, trying to trap him there. Robby laughed, breathless, as he squirmed and tried to throw him off. Mark laughed back, matching him move for move, shifting his hips to keep Robby pinned down. They struggled like that for a bit longer, huffing and panting, until Robby felt something hard digging in the small of his back. He went still – he knew what it was.

Mark must not have noticed it because he kept moving about, practically rubbing himself against Robby. Then he noticed it too and froze. They stayed like that for what felt like forever, Mark pressed intimately against Robby. Then he quickly jumped off, letting Robby up.

“Maybe we should just go to sleep.” Mark suggested.

Robby agreed, pulling the pillow under his head while Mark turned off the lights. They lied there, side by side, in darkness. Each knew that the other was awake but neither knew what to say.

“It was just my hip-bone.” Mark said.

“Sure.” Robby replied, not knowing what else to say.

“It just gets like that sometimes. I don’t know why.”

Robby thought about that.

“You know about sex-stuff, right?” He asked. They’d talked a lot about sex, but nothing that actually mattered.

“Don’t make fun of me, man.”

“I wasn’t…”

“If you tell the guys at school about it, I swear…”

“Dude, chill.” Robby said. “I’m not gonna say anything. I was just asking.”

They stayed quiet for a while until Mark spoke up again.

“I know about some sex stuff. Like it’s supposed to happen with girls. I don’t know why it happened now. I’m not into you. I mean, you are cool and all, but I don’t wanna kiss you or…”

“It’s fine, man.” Robby spoke up before Mark could spiral further. “We’re cool.”

“It just happens all the time and it’s embarrassing.” Mark sighed. “I tried to look it up on the net, but my mom has like a hundred parental controls on every computer.”

Robby thought about what to say next. This was some real talk, something important. Not their usual bullshit.

“What do you usually do?” He asked.

“I just, kind of, press on it until it goes away.” Mark replied. “Maybe think of some gross stuff.”

Robby turned to look at him. He could barely make out his face in the dark.

“Haven’t you tried jerking off?”

“I don’t know how.” Mark sounded ashamed.

Robby was surprised at that. He’d figured it came to people naturally.

“You just, kind of, rub and stroke it.”

“But that just makes it worse.”

“Yeah, but if you keep doing it, you get to cum and it goes away.”

He could feel Mark sit up and look at him. Mark turned the lights back on.

“Robby, do you know about this stuff?”

Robby shrugged. “A guy I knew told me all about it.”

“Oh.” Mark seemed disappointed. “Guys say all sorts of crap, okay. My cousin told me that jerking off meant slapping your dick and that it feels good. Trust me – it doesn’t.”

Robby considered that, amused. This was a point of no return, he realized. If he confided the truth in Mark, he could use that to destroy him at school. But Mark had confided in him, trusted him. Didn’t he owe him the same?

“No, this works.” He explained. “The guy was older. He knew what he was talking about. He _showed_ me how it works. He let me try it too.”

Mark’s eyes went wide at that. “Have you done sex already?” He asked in awe.

Had he? That sounded ridiculous, right? He couldn’t even get hard – how could he have sex? Surely the thing with Cody didn’t count. Robby shook his head.

“I just know how some of it works.”

“Will you show me? Like this guy showed you?”

Robby was taken aback at that. This was crossing some line, surely. But Mark was his friend and he needed help and this was something Robby could actually help him with. Besides, it felt like the most real conversation they’d ever had.

“Uhh… sure.” Robby replied.

They both sat up and looked at each-other. Robby realized that he actually had no idea where to go from here. He couldn’t jerk off yet so he couldn’t exactly give Mark a demonstration. And telling Mark to do it felt like doing something wrong.

“Umm… should I be naked for this?” Mark asked, hesitating.

Thank God he’d been the one to offer. Robby hadn’t known how to bring it up. He nodded.

Mark quickly took off his t-shirt and shorts. Then he hesitated, standing there in his briefs. Robby could see the outline of his bulge through there and Mark covered himself up embarrassed by his gaze.He took a deep breath and pulled down his briefs as well. He covered his crotch with his hands for a bit more but then found the courage to expose himself and sat back down on the bed, his legs spread.

“Now what?”

Robby looked at him, up and down. He could see tufts of hair coming out of his underarms. And there was a spattering of it around his crotch – a far cry from the jungle Cody had had. His dick was already hard and standing up straight, but it looked softer than Cody’s had. It was a lot smaller – it looked like it could easily fit in Robby’s hand.

“Now you grab your dick with your hand, like this,” Robby showed him the motion, “and try moving it up and down. ”

Mark followed his instructions and gave himself a few tugs. But his face made it look like it was uncomfortable.

“It doesn’t feel right.” He said.

“Keep going.” Robby encouraged him. “Just a bit more.”

“No man.” Mark stopped after a few more tries. “It kinda burns.”

Robby leaned in to take a closer look. _Was it supposed to be different for different people?_ He reached out and felt Mark suck in his breath as his hand wrapped around his friend’s member. He tried stroking it and Mark squirmed in discomfort. It did feel different, somehow. Not like Cody at all. Something wasn’t right here.

That was it. Cody had already been slick and wet when Robby started, while Mark was dry as sand. That’s why it must feel uncomfortable – like getting a rug burn. Robby had an idea. He drew his hand back and spat on it.

“Dude, gross.” Mark said. “Don’t put that on me.”

“Trust me.” Robby said, repeating the action. He put his hand back on Mark and spread the spit around, getting the whole thing wet. Then he grabbed it again, firmly and started stroking.

The effect was immediate. Mark tensed up, drawing his legs up and grabbing the mattress to steady himself.

“Oh shit! Oh shit, man!” He moaned. “That feels amazing.”

Robby smiled, continuing his ministrations. But he shouldn’t be the one doing this, he realized. Mark should be handling it himself. As things got a little drier, he removed his hand.

“Okay. Now you try it.” He told him, getting up to find a towel or something for himself. Mark nodded.

“Are you supposed to use spit all the time?” Mark asked, as Robby rummaged through the drawers. “Seems gross.”

“Dunno. Maybe.” Robby hadn’t thought about that. The precum that came out made stroking easier but that didn’t come out until after you started stroking. Seemed like a chicken and egg thing. “Maybe that’s what you are supposed to use lube for.”

They looked at each-other. “Whoa…” they said in unison.

Robby went back to the rummaging, feeling pretty proud of himself for having worked that out, until he found a small hand-towel. When he turned around, he saw that Mark had stopped and was crossing his legs in embarrassment.

“What’s wrong?” Robby asked.

“It just feels weird, doing this in front you.” Mark replied. “I mean, I’m butt naked here, dude.”

Robby nodded. He supposed it was kinda weird.

“I could go out for a bit.” He offered. “Pretend like I’m getting a glass of water?”

“Or you could take your clothes off too?” Mark suggested.

Robby hesitated. It wasn’t that he was embarrassed to be naked with Mark – they’d been naked together plenty of times in the locker-room. It wasn’t even that he was ashamed of being behind. Mark was older – so that was okay. It was just – every time he’d crossed that line, things had ended badly for him. And he didn’t want this to end that way. _But those were grown-ups,_ his mind supplied. _And Mark isn’t dating Mom._ Robby nodded. He took off his shirt and pulled down his shorts along with his undies. And then he went back to the bed, sitting cross-legged from across Mark.

“Whoa…” Mark whispered, looking at Robby admiringly. “You really are fully smooth.”

Robby flushed. He didn’t need a reminder.Mark reached down, taking Robby in hand. He fondled is balls and tried pulling at his dick a few times.

“You really don’t get hard?” He asked.

“No,” Robby said, annoyed. “I told you that already.”

Mark drew his hand back awkwardly.

“Yeah. I know. I thought you might be lying.” He looked sheepish. “You just know so much about this stuff. And it’s like…. Y’know… you don’t get good at the game without playing.”

Robby smiled awkwardly at the compliment. _I did play. Just not with myself._

“Just keep doing that.”

He watched Mark continue to stroke, his eyes rolling back in his head. It reminded him of Cody and all the other stuff he’d done with him. “Hey, touch your chest.” Robby suggested.

Mark obeyed, moving his hand across. “Hmm, that’s nice.” He said.

He didn’t react like Cody had. Robby was puzzled. He reached his own hand out and moved it across Mark’s chest, his fingers brushing against his nipple. That got a reaction – Mark whimpered and arched his back. His breaths were coming harder and his hand was moving faster now. _So that works better when someone else does it,_ Robby figured. _Like how you can’t tickle yourself._

“Hey, can I see your butt?” Mark asked, stopping to catch his breath.

Robby raised his eyebrows.

“It’s just, I think girl’s butts are kinda cute. And I wanted to touch one.” Mark smiled. “And it’s not like you have boobs.”

People seemed a little too obsessed with his butt, Robby thought. They always wanted to do stuff to it – stroking it, squeezing it, grabbing it,… spanking it. But this was Mark. So Robby got up on his knees and turned around, letting him get a good look.

Immediately, Mark reached out with his left hand and started feeling him up. Softly at first and then more firmly and confidently. It felt pretty nice, Robby thought. But then, it’d always felt nice. His hand dipped into the valley between his cheeks, going deeper, exploring. His fingers brushed against Robby’s hole and he shuddered with fear. _No. Not that again._

“Don’t touch that.” He said suddenly, startling Mark. “I mean, don’t go there.”

Mark considered it for a moment. “Yeah, umm… gross, right?”

Robby nodded, relieved. He wasn’t ready to share that. Marks hand moved out and he gave Robby a playful little slap, making him jerk.

“You got a really cute butt, you know? I never noticed that before.” He said, slapping it softly a few more times. “I like how it jiggles.”

Robby always felt weirded out by compliments, especially ones like these. So he told Mark to get on with it. But Mark had another idea.

“Umm… could you play the girl for a bit?” He asked. “Like touch me like you did before and I can touch you?”

Robby found the way he said it annoying. He wasn’t a girl. But Mark hadn’t meant anything by it and he looked at him so eagerly and excited that Robby didn’t want to refuse. He nodded and turned around. Mark was already on his knees, scooting closer. He immediately put both his hands back on Robby’s butt, pulling him closer until their legs touched. Robby kept there torsos apart, one hand back on Mark’s dick, while the other stroked his chest.

Marks’ hands started with kneading and massaging his butt, but then moved all over the place. From the top of his neck down to the back of his thighs. Even dipping between his cheeks a couple of times, but thankfully, he refrained from probing deeper. A couple of times he brought one hand in front, fondling his soft dick and balls before moving back.

Robby wondered how long he was going to last as he stroked his dick faster. It was an awkward angle and his wrist wasn’t used to moving like that. They hadn’t been doing it for long and boys new to this weren’t supposed to last, right? Mark certainly seemed to get closer. He was leaning forward, eyes closed, breaths coming in short and shaky. He was moaning, Robby realized. He was probably imagining a girl right now in Robby’s place – maybe Missy.

“Robby - ” He whispered, suddenly pulling him closer. He leaned in can captured Robby’s lips with his mouth. Robby was taken by complete surprise.

At the same time, he erupted between them. His cum splashed against Robby’s chest and stomach as his dick pulsed in his hand. He let out a whimpering breath after he was finished and fell back, exhausted. He finally opened his eyes and looked up at Robby, scared and in awe.

Robby looked down at himself, covered in gunk. “A little warning next time?” He said, exasperated.

“I didn’t know that was gonna happen.” Mark said in wonderment. “Th-that’s cumming, right? Like an orgasm?”

“Yeah.” Robby said, wiping himself.

“That was the most awesome thing that has ever happened to me.” Mark still sounded dazed. “Dude, you really need to get in on this.”

Robby smiled. He’d just had his first kiss, he realized suddenly. Not the adult-on-kid kind of kisses, but a real kiss. And he’d liked it. He leaned down towards Mark, testing the water, hoping that he’d be open to kissing him again.

“Boys.” A voice called out from outside the door. “You better not be awake in there.”

_Shit. Mr Walker. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit._ They both stared at each-other, frozen in fear. The spell was broken and reality came crashing down on them. Something that had been fun and exciting only moments ago was now suddenly shameful and humiliating. If they were caught like this… naked, on top of each-other and covered in cum… Neither of them moved an inch.

_Walk away,_ Robby begged. _Please just believe that we are asleep and walk away._

Thankfully, he did. Their straining ears heard the soft, retreating footsteps and the boys immediately jumped into action. Robby tossed the towel to Mark to wipe himself down and fumbled back into his clothes as quickly and quietly as possible. Mark did the same. Once they were dressed, Robby turned off the lights and Mark tiptoed over to the door, removing the towel under and quietly unlocking it. It wasn’t until they were both back in bed that they collectively let out the breath they’d been holding in.

Relief didn’t last long for Robby, however. He laid there, staring blankly at the ceiling, fear growing in the pit of his stomach. Now that it was all done, he was afraid something had changed between them. Something must have, right? But he wasn’t sure what to say.

“Hey Robby.” Mark said sleepily. “Thanks for showing me that. It was really awesome.”

That made Robby feel warm all over.

“You are a really cool guy, y’know?” Mark continued, reaching over and rubbing Robby’s arm. “I’m glad you are my best friend.”

Robby choked out a thanks. It sounded hoarse even to him, but he didn’t care. He’d never been anyone’s best friend before. Maybe things didn’t have to change after all.

* * *

But something did change – Robby just couldn’t put his finger on it. Things were fine for the next few days and then Mark started avoiding him. He made lame excuses to avoid talking to him in the halls, he started sitting elsewhere for lunch, he stopped calling to invite Robby over. Robby had called his home on his birthday to wish him, but Mrs. Walker had answered and she’d been pretty brief with him. She’d pass on his wishes, but Mark was busy and they were having a small family celebration. That hadn’t made sense – he was sure he remembered Mark talking about having a party. And Mrs Walker’s voice had had none of her usual kindness.

Maybe Mark was freaking out a little. But that didn’t explain all the other stuff. Other kids were avoiding him too. They seemed to whisper, throwing him looks and they stopped when he went over to talk to them. One by one, his usual gang of friends stopped sitting down with him for lunch. He could hear people sniggering behind his back.

Had Mark told them about that night? No – that didn’t make sense. Mark’s reputation would’ve been destroyed too and nobody was treating him any different. Besides, something like that would’ve led to a much bigger reaction. People would be pushing him around, calling him names, spray-painting “fag” on his locker. This low-key ice out didn’t make sense.

He was being paranoid, Robby decided. He was letting his fears from that night get the better of him. Mark was just freaked out for a bit and he’d come around and the other kids were just being assholes as usual. He had the spring formal to think of and make sure he asked April out before any other jerk locked her down.

April turned him down flat. Didn’t even bother to let him down gently. Robby didn’t understand that – he thought she was a friend. That they got along.

“You are a phony, Robby Keene.” She said. “You act all nice like a good guy, but you are really just a very messed up person inside. Mark said so. And now everybody can see it. You are just a liar putting on a good guy act.”

Robby could feel the heat rising in his face, his ears burning with embarrassment. He heard some of April’s friends snigger behind him. He could feel everyone in class staring at him. It was gone, just like that. The cover he had carefully constructed for himself blown away in an instant. Or maybe it was never fooling anybody at all. Maybe the only person Robby had fooled was himself.

_Fine._ Robby thought. _Good._ He didn’t need it anyway. It’d been exhausting putting up the front. If they already saw him as the bad guy, why bother pretending?

“Well, you are just a fucking cold-hearted bitch.” He spat at her.

April’s jaw dropped open. Robby heard the collective gasp behind him with some satisfaction. Now he’d done it. He’d gone for a twofer – both the f-word and the b-word. He knew there would be trouble after this – teachers would get involved, parents would be called, detentions handed out. He didn’t care. He just walked out. He had someone else to deal with.

Robby found Mark at his locker. He stormed up to him and slammed his palm against the metal.

“You think it’s funny messing me, asshole?” Robby asked angrily.

Mark jumped and looked at him scared.

“Robby?” He tried feigning nonchalance. “I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“Bullshit.” He was really going through his vocabulary today. “You’ve been talking shit about me behind my back.”

“I didn’t do that, I swear.” He said defensively.

“Yeah? Just like you didn’t invite me to your party?” That was an educated guess, but the guilty look on Mark’s face was all the confirmation Robby needed.

“I have to get to class.” Mark said, ashamed.

Robby was going to kick his ass. He didn’t care if he got suspended or even expelled.

“Are you really that freaked out about what we did?” Robby asked. “I was trying to help you, man.”

Mark looked panicked. He looked around to see if anyone had heard them.

“Don’t talk about that here, dude!” He whispered.

“Why not?” Robby said, a little louder. “You obviously told people your side of the story. Maybe I should tell them mine.”

That scared him, Robby saw. He looked around and saw that other students were starting to pay attention. He looked cornered.

“Come with me.” Mark said, grabbing Robby by the arm and dragging him along.

He dragged him all the way to the bathroom at the end of the school, the one that was usually less crowded. Once inside. Mark checked the stalls to make sure they were alone in there. Robby just stood there, arms crossed and fuming.

“I didn’t tell any kids about what we did, I swear. And I definitely didn’t say anything bad about you.” Mark pleaded. Then he looked down guiltily, “But I am sorry that we can’t hang out anymore.”

“Don’t fuck with me, Mark.” Robby said, trying to choke back his tears. “I did it to help you.”

“You did help me. And I really liked it.” Mark said, giving him a trembling smile. “I did it a bunch of time again on my own. But it was better with you.”

“Then - ”

“Mom caught me.”

_Oh._ “Shit.”

“Yeah.” Mark wiped his mouth. “She just freaked out. Went totally nuts. Started yelling about me being too young and doing messed up stuff. She knew I didn’t learn it at home because she has like a thousand locks on everything. She wanted to know who told me about it.”

“You told her?” Robby’s heart sank.

“I had to, dude.” Mark explained. “She thought I was picking it up at school. She was going to call the principle to ask about it. I couldn’t let her do that!”

Robby nodded, looking down. He could feel his anger ebbing away. He understood – he didn’t want to, but he understood. Mark reached to touch his shoulder. Robby wanted to jerk back – reject his token of comfort, but couldn’t.

“I tried to explain it to her.” He said. “I told her I wanted to know. But she just – sometimes she just gets some crazy idea stuck in her head and that’s it. She now thinks that you are a… bad influence.”

“You mean she thinks I’m a perv who molested her son.” Robby said bitterly. It wasn't fair. Mark was _older_ than him.

Mark didn’t reply, but the miserable look on his face said it all.

“It’s not all bad.” Mark’s face brightened a little. “My dad gets it. He thought it was pretty funny, actually. He told mom it was just boys being boys. That this is part of growing up. And then he said a bunch of stuff about lifelong complexes and adolescent sexuality that I didn’t really get but…” he shrugged. “Bottom line. He says we didn’t do anything wrong. That it was normal and nothing to be ashamed of. He told me so. That mom is just freaking out because she is not used to the idea. She’ll come around soon. You’ll see. And then everything can go back to normal.”

“But you can’t hang out with me until then.” Robby said sadly.

Mark nodded.

“I don’t know what’s going on with the other kids, but I had nothing to do with that, I swear.”

Robby shook his head. Mark might not be ready to see it, but Robby did. Mrs. Walker had clearly changed her mind about him completely. And she must have warned the other parents. She might’ve kept some details to herself, but she must have told them that he was really bad news and they had to keep their kids away from him. To protect them. Somehow, it had just spread all around and everyone had turned against him without even knowing why. It was over for him. He was never going to recover from this. Not on top of what he had done today.

Robby felt a tear trickle down his cheek. He wiped it off angrily.

“I’m really sorry about this, man. Just, give it time, okay?” He gave Robby a last sad look. “See you around…”

Alone in the bathroom, Robby thought about what Mark had said. He was already done with him, Robby knew that, even if Mark didn’t. He’d hold on to hope for a while, miss Robby for a bit, but his mother’s anger would outlast him and he’d move on with his other friends. But Mark's dad had said what they did wasn’t wrong. And it hadn’t _felt_ wrong. So what actually did go wrong here? And why did it keep happening? Maybe it wasn’t that Robby kept messing up, maybe he _was_ the mess. It wasn’t that he was doing anything wrong, he was the thing that was wrong. Somehow. In some way.


	6. 13(1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so this one ended up being a real monster - of a chapter. Though there are monsters here too. 
> 
> I wanted to keep it down to one, but it grew and grew and kept growing. It ended up being a whole story on its own. So I'm splitting this up in parts - though I'm not sure how many. 
> 
> And like I said, there is some disturbing stuff here. Some real monsters. For your sanity, I'd suggest skipping the whole 13 series and maybe heading to 16 directly. 
> 
> Oh - and those judging me, well, a lot of sexual stuff in here is based on my memories of my own adolescent fantasies - so I'd prefer you judge me on that instead.

“Hey Robby, could you get me a beer?” Roger asked.

“Get it yourself.” Robby replied.

“Robby, be nice.” His mom said, eyes still glued to the TV.

Robby huffed and got up, annoyed. Why was it always the kid who got screwed over in situations like this? Grown-ups never missed a moment of the show – not when they had him to boss around. He liked the show too and he didn’t want to miss anything important. He was practically walking backwards towards the fridge.

An idea came to him as he got the beer out of the fridge. _That’ll teach him. He’ll get his own beer next time._ After a look at them to make sure they were still engrossed with the TV, Robby gave the can a quick, vigorous shake. Then, looking as innocent as possible and trying not to smile, he went back and handed it to Roger. And waited for him to open it.

“What the - ?” Roger sputtered as beer sprayed like a fountain right onto his face. Shannon shrieked as she got caught up in the splash. “Robby!”

Robby couldn’t keep it in anymore. He howled with laughter so hard that he fell back on the couch. Then he saw Roger get up, half-smirking, eyes hungry for revenge.

“You little…”

“Shit…”

Robby tried to run. He ducked under Roger’s arm, jumping on top of the couch and vaulting over the back to make a beeline for his room. But Roger caught him mid-air, strong arm wrapping around his waist, physically holding him up mid-air.

“Let go!” Robby yelled.

Roger laughed behind him and started rubbing his face on the back of Robby’s shirt. _He’s using me as a towel,_ Robby realized. _He’s holding me up like I weigh nothing and using me like a towel._ Roger’s chin was digging all over Robby’s back, kind of tickling him and making him laugh as well. When he was done, Roger fell back on the sofa with Robby still on top of him. Roger was still holding on to him tightly.

“Look at the mess you made, Robby.” Shannon said, angrily.

“Don’t worry, sweetheart. I’m punishing him for it.” Roger said, digging his fingers into Robby’s side, making him squirm and squeal with laughter. Shannon shook her head, exasperated, but smiling. Then a character that was supposed to be dead showed back and they all went back to the show.

They spent rest of the episode like that, with Robby nestled between the two of them. Roger still held him against his chest, arm wrapped around him and chin resting on top of his head. Robby relaxed and leaned back into it. His feet were on his mom’s lap and she idly stroked his leg. If this was supposed to be his punishment, he could use some more of it. 

* * *

After Pierre, Shannon had been careful about whom she brought back and Robby was thankful for that. Even if it meant she started staying over at their places a lot more. She took more time before she introduced anyone to him and she always watched their interactions more closely. And if they said anything wrong or looked at Robby the wrong way, they were gone the next day. For his part, Robby had been nice, like his mom had asked. Well, nice-er. Well, he hadn’t pissed anyone off anyway. The losers she’d brought back had not made it easy. Until Roger, that was.

Roger was nice. He reminded Robby of Brent from all those years ago. Except, he was actually nothing like Brent at all. For one thing, Brent had been older. More dad-ish. And despite an “old-dude” name like that, Roger was younger. Under 30, Robby guessed. Younger than Mom – not that she’d ever let him find out. He was also richer, apparently. Brent hadn’t exactly been poor, but based on his car and the places he took them, he hadn’t been rich either. But Roger was, which was surprising. He was only an accountant, but his family had money, so he was always buying Mom nice stuff and had a house where all the rich people lived. Robby guessed the big difference was that Brent had been pretty average all around. And the only thing they had in common was that they both actually gave a shit about him. The more time he spent with Roger, the more differences he noticed.

Roger was definitely more sporty, Robby learned about a week after meeting him. At first, Robby kept his distance. He didn’t want to get too close to Mom’s latest fling. Then one day, he was practicing his skateboarding in the apartment parking lot when he heard Roger laugh. He was practicing his grind and he had just fallen on his ass the hundredth time.

“You are not shifting your weight right, bud.” Came the unsolicited advice. “You gotta lean into it.”

“You skate?” Robby asked, surprised.

“Do I?” Roger replied, flipping the board with his foot and catching it without even looking down.

He taught Robby how. He corrected his posture. He told him how to shift his weight. And then he stood there as Robby practiced falling down again and again. Until Robby finally got it.

“Awesome, dude.” Roger said, giving him a high-five.

Robby decided he liked Roger then.

* * *

The way they treated Robby was also pretty different. Brent had seemed more… respectful, somehow. He had kept his distance for the first few weeks until he got to know Robby better. Roger treated him like a long-lost friend from the very start. That had weirded Robby out at first, but it made Mom smile, so he had gotten over it.

But there was more to it than that. Brent had a way of making Robby feel more grown-up. Like Robby’s opinion of things had actually mattered. Roger somehow made him feel younger than his thirteen years. He kept calling Robby “bud” or “buddy” or “champ” no matter how many times Robby corrected him. He was too old for those childish nicknames, even though they sometimes made him smile. He also kept explaining things to Robby like he was slow or something. But it wasn’t in a bad way – Robby could somehow sense that. It wasn’t like it had been with Pierre. Pierre hadn’t just talked down to Robby – he’d actually put him down.

Maybe this was all just new to Roger, Robby realized one day. This was probably his first relationship with someone with a kid and he didn’t really know how to deal with it. He was a nice enough guy and he always treated Mom right – so Robby guessed he could forgive him that. Maybe he did deserve a real chance.

The biggest difference, however, was also the most obvious one – in their looks. Brent had been normal looking – like usual old guys were supposed to look. Roger looked like a fucking male model. When Shannon had first introduced them, Robby had figured him to be another Cody – some guy she’d mess around with and dump after she got bored. And for a moment, Robby was afraid that he _would_ turn out to be like Cody – forcing them to eat all that disgusting “healthy” food. But thankfully, whatever opinions Roger had on their diet, he kept to himself.

He _was_ insanely good looking though, and he knew it. He was proud of it. And he actually worked at it. He worked out all the time, even though their apartment was too small for that. He was always doing crunches and situps and pushups whenever he had a free moment. And it showed. He had big beefy arms, he could make his pecs bounce and his abs were absolutely ripped. Robby could count eight of them. His whole body looked like there wasn’t an ounce of fat in it.

That was another thing about Roger – he loved showing off. He was always flexing and admiring himself in the mirror – which made Robby scoff and roll his eyes. He always wore tight clothes to show off his muscles and Robby was sure they must be cutting off circulation somewhere. And he was almost always shirtless around the house. And it was starting to make Robby a little self-conscious. He knew he had nothing to be ashamed of – even though he was young, he was already starting to develop some abs from all the skateboarding. But next to Roger, he practically felt pudgy.

“Put on a shirt, dude.” Robby said one morning when Roger walked in wearing just his embarrassingly low slung jeans.

“What? You don’t like the gun-show?” Roger said, flexing.

Robby rolled his eyes, but Roger caught him sneaking a look anyway. His smirk told Robby that the teasing had just begun.

“Aww… you do love it. C’mere take a closer look.” He said, coming closer. He kept posing, teasing Robby, ignoring how Robby was trying to ignore him. “Do I make you feel bad? Don’t worry, I can show you how to be _this_ awesome.”

“I don’t know.” Robby said, finally looking right at his stomach. “Looks a little flabby to me.”

“You did not just say that to me.” Roger said, feigning offence.

He grabbed Robby’s arms as Robby laughed and put them on his chest and abs.

“Go on – feel that.” He said, “Does that feel like fat to you?”

“Boys. Stop it before you break something.” Shannon shouted from the kitchen.

Sheepishly, they separated. It was probably the first time Shannon was acting like the adult in the relationship.

“Yes, mom.” Robby said.

“Yes, “mom”.” Roger repeated after him.

Shannon swirled around, looking at them with that angry-but-not-really look. “Oh you two will make me old.” She said, before turning back to cooking.

Roger smirked and put a finger on his lips to Robby. Quietly, he sneaked behind her and grabbed her around the waist. He swept her off her feet as she squealed.

“I know how to make you feel young again.” He said, kissing her neck.

That was Robby’s cue to get out of there. He quickly went back to his room before anything really started and shut the door behind him. Thankfully, he heard them going into Mom’s room after a few moments and locking the door. Now he wouldn’t have to worry about avoiding any surfaces in the kitchen. Robby sighed in relief and pressed down on his crotch. Hopefully, Roger hadn’t noticed that he’d popped a boner.

Robby was finally in that phase of his life and he was relieved about that. His hair had started growing in a few months back. He had noticed that his balls had begun to loosen up and he liked playing with that – stretching and fondling them to see how far they’d go. He could feel soft hair growing between his legs – under his balls – and they tickled when he touched them and he liked that as well. And then it had finally happened for him. He’d woken up one night feeling a wetness in his pants. For a moment, he’d thought he’d peed himself – God, wouldn’t that be humiliating? But his dick had felt painfully hard and he knew what it was. It’d taken him a few tries but he’d finally gotten the hang of it. Now he finally knew what the fuss was all about. And he was mostly enjoying the ride.

Mostly. Awkward boners were an unexpected problem. He’d figured he’d have a better handle on it since he knew about this stuff already. But no – even the slightest touch could set him off. And sometimes it just stood up for no reason – even if he was doing something boring like math. It was like it had a mind of its own. And it was especially difficult for Robby once he figured out that both boys and girls gave him that tingly feeling.

And then there was Roger. Robby knew he shouldn’t be having these feelings – but just look at him. It was like he’d stepped out of an underwear ad. And it certainly didn’t help how physical he was. He’d felt ashamed of his crush on a grown man until he’d realized that Roger wasn’t exactly a grown up. He didn’t act like one. He acted more like an older brother would, Robby imagined. Still, he was dating Mom and Robby was determined not to screw this up for her, like he had with Brent.


	7. 13(2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said, this is a long one. Also, since I am splitting it, but didn't write it that way, excuse any awkward editing.

Robby wanted things to work out with Roger. He really did. Especially once he saw where Roger lived.

Mom always said she brought guys over because she didn’t like to leave Robby alone for the night (even though she had done that plenty of times). That’s what she told Roger when he asked why they didn’t hang out at his place more.

“Well, he can come over too.” Roger said. “And stay the night. I got more than enough room and the neighborhood is way safer than this one. I can even pick him up from school when you are busy. I like hanging out with the little guy.”

Robby’s eyes went wide when he saw the place. It was like a palace. Well, not really – but it had two storeys and three bedrooms, each bigger than their whole apartment. The kitchen was huge and clean – not dingy and moldy like theirs. There was this glass house in the backyard that Roger had converted into a home gym. The backyard was big enough to throw the ball around. But the best thing was the pool – big, blue and sparkly with a jacuzzi at the end. Robby could really imagine himself living there and for the first time in his life hoped that Mom would talk to him about moving. It’d also mean he’d get to transfer out of his school which would be a great way to start over. Not many kids at the school talked to him anymore. Not since he’d called April a bitch.

Robby wanted to jump in the pool right away, but Mom had absolutely forbidden it. And for once, Roger had agreed like an adult. It was a hard no on swimming at night from both of them. But Roger saw his disappointment and threw him a crumb.

“I’m working from home tomorrow and you are busy anyway.” He said. “How about I pick Robby up from school and he can spend the day with me.”

Mom agreed and Robby almost didn’t sleep that night in excitement.

* * *

He’d been practically giddy the next day until he actually got the pool and realized that he’d forgotten his swim-shorts at home.

What. A. Moron.Worse, he was wearing his white briefs that day and he knew what happened when you got into water with those. But Roger just patted him on the back and offered to lend him one of his.

They were blue, square-cut trunks that Robby imagined fit Roger like a glove. But they were obviously too big for Robby. The first time he let go of them, they just slid down his legs without resistance. So he pulled them again and pulled at the strings hard before tying the knot as tight as possible. They sagged a little, but atleast they stayed up this time.

_My junk is touching the same place Roger’s has been,_ he realized. The thought made him tingly and he started to get hard again. Nervously, he looked into the mirror to see if it showed – but the trunks were like shorts on him, loose enough to hide anything embarrassing. And for once, Robby felt thankful that he wasn’t one of the “big” guys yet.

Roger was sitting on a chair by the pool when Robby went to him and waited for permission. He’d changed into his swim-shorts as well. He wasn’t planning on swimming, he told Robby, he was just ready to jump in if there was trouble.

“You do know how to swim, right?” He asked. “Can’t have you drowning your first time over. Your mom would never come here again.” 

Robby nodded. He was good at swimming. He knew both normal and backstroke, he could hold his breath for a really long time and he was great at diving.

“Alright, champ. Get in there.”

Robby didn’t need to be told twice. He turned and dove right in. The dive was perfectly executed. He knew that from the way the water had slipped right past his skin without a hint of resistance. He hoped Roger was watching. As he glided underwater effortlessly, he thought about how Roger might be standing up when he resurfaced. He’d be impressed. He’d tell Robby how awesome that had been.

Too late, he realized the shorts had slipped completely off of him. Not even tangled around his feet.

Robby resurfaced, frantically looking around for them, hoping to grab them before Roger noticed anything. But Roger was already laughing and Robby could see the shorts all the way back at the edge of the pool. Before he could even think about swimming towards them, Roger knelt down and fished them out of water.

“Lose something there, champ?” He chuckled, twirling the shorts around his finger.

“Very funny. Give them back.” Robby tried to play it off. He covered his junk with his hands even though he was pretty sure Roger couldn’t see anything underwater.

“Come and get them.” Roger replied, holding them up.

_Is he serious?_ “No! Just give them back.”

“Naw… this is payback for the beer.”

_Shit. He got me._ Robby knew he had no choice. The longer he waited the more he’d be teased.

He turned around and got out of the pool on the other side. He covered himself with his hands and ran around to get to Roger. But as he tried to snatch the shorts, Roger held them high above his head, out of reach.

“C’mon, man.” Robby pleaded. “This isn’t funny.” He jumped up and down trying to reach them, but Roger was just too tall. And too busy laughing.

“Alright, alright. Fine.” He said finally. Then he jerked his head towards the table. “Hey, just put your own undies on.”

Robby looked at the pile of clothes on the table skeptically. Roger must have brought them down when he was in the shower. He wasn’t sure. Despite the embarrassment, he was still a little stiff and he didn’t want Roger to see that. Besides, they were white and…

“Dude, it’s fine.” Roger said kindly. “No one here is gonna make fun of you.”

Robby nodded and got his briefs. He made sure to face away from Roger when he put them on. As he was bent over, he thought he could feel eyes on his backside, but when he turned around, he saw that Roger was considerately looking away. He was thankful for that and he took full advantage of it, getting back into water before Roger could turn back.

Robby swam for what felt like hours, his embarrassment forgotten within minutes of getting back in water. He lost himself in the glorious feeling and even his boner went away after a while. He swam back and forth, muscles aching comfortably, until Roger called to him and told him it was time to get out. This had been an awesome day.

It was only later in the shower that he realized that he might’ve screwed up again. He did something embarrassing that his mom couldn’t or shouldn’t find out about. And guys either freaked out or said something to freak her out and it all went to shit. He was nervous at dinner that night, wondering how he’d ruin things this time.

And then Roger told his mom about him losing his shorts.

Robby was aghast. _Is he crazy? Is he trying to ruin everything?_

His ears burned in humiliation but he couldn’t look away for the fear of how his mom would react. But Shannon just laughed right alongside Roger.

“Oh, I’m sorry that happened, honey.” She said, wiping her tears. “I’ll make sure you pack your shorts the next time.”

“Don’t even worry about it.” Roger said, still chuckling. “We can buy him a pair and he can just leave them here. Then he can come over for swimming any time he wants.”

Robby gave a weak smile, relieved. He hadn’t ruined anything. Or if he had, Roger had just given him a pass on it. He treated the whole thing like a joke. Like it was no big deal. Like it was just a funny thing they could laugh off. Things were going to work out after all.

* * *

The next time he went over was a few days later. And as promised, Roger had already bought a pair of shorts for him. Two pairs, actually. One a plain black brief style speedo and the other printed square-cut trunks. No board shorts though, Robby realized disappointed. That’s what most people wore. But these were better for swimming, Roger told him. Shorts were good for beaches and pool-parties, but Robby liked to actually swim and these would have less drag. And they’d fit better, so Robby wouldn’t have to worry about a losing them again. Robby felt warm that Roger had actually put this much thought into it for his sake, so he thanked him and went inside to try them on.

No good. The speedos were a size too small. They squished his junk uncomfortably and he could see his pubes sticking out of the top. He turned around to look at his backside – even worse. Half of his ass was hanging out and he could see the top of his buttcrack. If he got a boner in these, he’d definitely pop out. He definitely could not go out in these. He tried the trunks next. Same problem – they were also too small. _Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._ He should’ve thought of this. Ofcourse Roger wouldn’t know how to shop for a kid. And how was he supposed to know Robby’s size anyway? It was a nice gesture and it was the thought that counted, but still… Well, the trunks covered more – almost normal – and Robby desperately wanted to swim today. So he went with that.

Roger was getting in water today. He was already in there when Robby got out. Ofcourse he knew how to swim, Robby thought, and ofcourse he was fucking perfect at it. Roger cut through water like a sword and Robby could practically see his back muscles ripple with every stroke. He was wearing trunks too, Robby saw. Blue ones. The same ones he’d given him. Robby adjusted himself quickly before Roger noticed him and got into the water. _Atleast I won’t pop out of these._

Roger splashed water on him after he got in. Robby splashed some right back. It turned into a war which Robby quickly lost, laughing and sputtering. This day was turning out even better than the last one and somehow, the fear of being found out made it all the more exciting. Robby was rock hard in his trunks and he was sure that a single look downwards or an accidental brush would give him away. He tried his hardest to just will it away, but it was no good – not with Roger right there all big and wet and muscular and almost naked. He had a plan all ready – he’d laugh it off, make some joke about teenage hormones or Roger being pretty like a girl. It would be no big deal. Except, he never had to. Roger never seemed to notice, not even when Robby was sure there was no way he could’ve missed it. Not when Robby got out to do cannonballs (though he did try his damndest to keep his back to him). Not when Roger swam underwater between his legs and rose up, physical lifting him and throwing him backwards. Not when Robby foolishly jumped on his back and found himself pressed against it. And not when Robby kept reaching down to adjust himself.

Or if Roger did notice him, he didn’t mention it at all and Robby was grateful for that. He acted like there was nothing wrong at all. In fact Roger did nothing wrong at all – nothing that adults weren’t supposed to do. Nothing that his mom hadn’t done when she’d taken him to the community swimming pool all those years ago. It was just his age, Robby told himself. That’s what was making this weird, but that didn’t stop him from feeling like a freak about it.

They raced end-to-end a couple of times. – which Robby easily lost. Roger taught him to swim better after that.

“You are really good already.” He told him. “But you are making small mistakes and you can be even faster.”

That surprised Robby a little, but Roger knew what he was talking about so he nodded. He let Roger manipulate his posture, pushing his waist lower and thighs upwards (thank God he didn’t have to put his hands on Robby’s crotch for that). When he grabbed him by the side of his butt to hold him in place, Robby was afraid that he’d cum right there. He later improved his backstroke as well, hands on Robby’s back and buttocks, holding him aloft. Robby wasn’t sure how he could’ve missed it then – not with how he was tenting out of water – but Roger was only looking at his face. Robby didn’t actually feel any difference in swimming – he felt like he was doing what he’d always done – but Roger said “Better” and Robby felt proud all the same.

They talked some too, as they stood breathless at the end of the pool after an intense lap.

“So, are you jerking off, yet?” Roger asked.

Robby was mortified. He _had_ noticed, after all.

“It’s just, your mom told me to give you “the talk” if I could.” Roger said, scratching his neck. “But I’m not sure where to start or how to do it.”

Well, that was no less mortifying. But Robby put on his best “casually superior” smile and let him off the hook.

“Yeah, you can chill. I have internet and I know how to use it.” He replied. “I already know all about the birds and the bees.”

Roger looked a little disappointed and Robby felt a little bad. _Maybe he wanted to do a “dad” thing and I took that from him._

“Still.” He insisted. “If you ever have any questions, just know that you can come to me.”

“Kill me now!” Robby rolled his eyes and went for another lap.

Robby almost forgot about his problem until Shannon arrived, telling them they’ve been playing long enough.

“You are going to look like prunes.” She shouted. “And Robby, you’ll get so tanned that people will think you are adopted.”

Robby was unsure for a moment – how to get out while hiding his stiffy. He couldn’t humiliate himself like that in front of his mom. But Roger rescued him there as well. He got out first and ran over to Shannon, grabbing her for a kiss.

“You are getting me wet.” She complained, but kissed him back anyway. Robby didn’t miss the opportunity. He quickly got out and wrapped a towel around his waist while they were distracted and whispering to each-other.

“Robby, did you finish your homework?” Shannon asked. Roger was behind her, hands wrapped around her waist and his chin on her shoulder, still dripping. “I told you no pool time until after you were done.”

Robby shrugged. “I’ll do it later.”

“You’ll do it now.” Shannon said, faking sternness. “Go back inside and don’t come out until you are done.”

That was fair, Robby supposed. He went back inside, ignoring their giggling and shushing.

He was ashamed, he thought, as he stroked his cock furiously in the shower. He shouldn’t be thinking like this. But the shame somehow made his dick even harder. He couldn’t help it. No one could blame him – not when Roger was that good-looking. The memories were so fresh that he could practically feel them. He could practically see Roger’s long black hair dripping water on him, his blue-eyes flashing, his tanned skin glowing in the sun. He could see how his muscles moved and flexed. He could feel his hands on him – touching his back, his chest, his sides. And then he could imagine himself in the pool with Roger – his legs wrapped around the bigger man’s toned waist, one hand under his ass to hold him steady. He could see him lean in for a kiss, lips wet and glistening. He could feel his other hand on his chest, stroking him, moving down, lower, lower… Robby came with a cry and a whimper.

The pleasure receded and all he was left with was the shame. He would figure it out, he promised himself. He won’t let it ruin anything. He obviously couldn’t parade around in those tiny trunks in front of Roger – but rejecting the gift would seem ungrateful. He’d bring over his own shorts from the next time – tell Roger that they felt more comfortable or something. It was just a crush – nothing more – and crushes went away with time. He would act normal around Roger, even if it meant avoiding this awesome place for a bit. And slowly, these feelings would go away. He’d fake it till he made it.

When he came back downstairs after finishing his homework, he found them in the kitchen, getting dinner ready. Roger wasn’t one of the guys who just sat in front of the TV – he helped out. Robby saw her hair looked wet and lanky and realized that she’d been swimming too. He felt happy for her – she deserved to have fun too. But something nagged at him… he didn’t remember seeing Mom bring her bathing suit.

And then it hit him… Oh God, they did it. They did _it._ And probably right in the pool too. He was _NEVER_ going back in that water again. _EVER_.

Well, atleast this helped with his Roger problem. A little.


	8. 13(3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some extreme grooming in this one.

It was one thing to swear to yourself that you’d avoid someone, quite another to actually do it. When you were a kid, you didn’t actually have any control over your schedule. Mom kept making plans, Roger kept inviting them over – even picking him up from school a few times – and Robby felt like he had no chance. What was he supposed to do anyway? What excuse he could come up with? That he was getting bored hanging out at Roger’s? Yeah, right. That he’d rather stay in his dingy apartment and do homework? Like anyone would buy that. That he’d rather hang out with his friends? What friends? The truth…? No – not a chance in hell.

So he kept going and suffered – if you could call that suffering. After all, what other kid could boast of this anyway – hanging out by the pool all day, with an amazing, cool older guy who taught him stuff about music and movies and games and sports and girls. Objectively, life couldn’t be better. Even the tingles he got felt really good. He liked the feeling of butterflies fluttering in his stomach when he was around Roger. If only he wasn’t so scared of screwing this up – for Mom and for himself – this would’ve been perfect. He’d hoped it’d go away in time but it didn’t look like it was going to happen anytime soon.

They didn’t stay over that often – and never two nights in a row. Maybe a day or two a week and usually a weekend. But it was enough that Robby now had a permanent go-bag in his closet – with a change of clothes, a toothbrush, his books and ofcourse, his swim-shorts. Robby had a sneaking suspicion once that they might be moving in with Roger without actually telling him. That one day, he’d wake up and find himself living with a “wife” and a “kid” and totally freak out. But no – that didn’t make sense. It’d only been a few months after all and Shannon hadn’t even exchanged keys. That came first, right? Those were the rules of “FRIENDS” – that old show that Mom loved. Sure, Roger had told them where he hid his spare key outside, so they could let themselves in whenever they wanted, but that wasn’t the same. Right?

They didn’t stay over that often, but it was still enough. Enough that Robby’s feelings weren’t going anywhere. And sometimes, it felt like the universe was conspiring against him.

* * *

Like this time he found the photo-album. He was just looking for something to read on the book-rack and the album was sticking out, so he picked it up without thinking. _Shit._ They were photos of Roger, all of them. Some black and white, some color, each one covering the whole page and each one beautiful. Roger was there, standing in an open, floral-print shirt, his jeans unbuttoned and unzipped, showing off his pubes. He was there at the kitchen counter, drinking coffee in tight, white briefs that accentuated his bulge. He was there in front of the bedroom curtains, his form silhouetted by the morning sun and you could barely see his ass. He was there naked, laughing, hands covering his crotch like he’d been caught in a compromising position. He was there naked again, crouching down and squaring off someone unseen, his legs spread apart, his muscular ass tensed, but his front hidden from the view. Robby felt like he was looking through a dirty magazine - but that wasn't right. Half of this type of stuff you saw in ads all the time - on TV and billboards and normal magazines. It was just seeing Roger like that that was making his heart race. 

“Whatchu looking at?”

Robby jumped, freaked out. “I wasn’t snooping, I promise.”

But Roger just laughed. “Yeah, I do a bit of modelling on the side. Shame to let all this go to waste, right?” He looked down, admiring himself.

Roger's lack of shame had always felt odd to Robby. He knew people shouldn't be ashamed of their bodies - that's what the teachers kept telling them - but the complete lack of any modest here... "Weren't you embarrassed doing this?" Robby asked. "Like, _I_ could never do something like that."

"At first. But then I got over it." Roger shrugged. "Look, I don't want people looking at my body all the time - I'd just live naked if I wanted that - but sometimes... well, sometimes you want people to look at you. To admire you. Makes you feel proud. And if they want to look too, well there is nothing wrong with that."

That made so much sense. He liked it when Roger looked at him too. He always tried extra-hard on his skateboard when he knew Roger was looking. He always swam faster when Roger was around. He loved it when Roger sat beside him, helping him with his homework. And he always flushed with pride when he commented on his growing body. _Roger must like me looking at him too - that's why he is shirtless all the time._ But there were some lines here - you couldn't and shouldn't look or show off anywhere where the underwear goes. Everyone knew that much - but maybe even that was okay _sometimes._

Roger left Robby there without further comment – he didn’t even take that album from him. But Robby was too ashamed and guilty to look any further. Until that night, that was, when he sneaked back down and carried the album back to his room.

* * *

Roger asked one day why Robby didn’t wear the swim-shorts he’d gotten him. It was subtle enough, but he could sense the disappointment behind the words. So he shrugged and decided to wear them that day. Except, Robby couldn’t find the trunks. He couldn’t believe he’d lost them – he hadn’t even touched them since that first time. He did want to make Roger happy, so he swallowed his embarrassment and put the speedos on. They seemed even smaller than before. But Roger would be cool, right?

Roger started laughing the moment Robby stepped out. “Oh man, this is too good.” He grabbed his phone and started taking pictures.

“What are you-? No!” Robby was horrified. He covered himself and turned way. That wasn’t better. He unsuccessfully tried to cover his backside with one hand. “Stop that.”

“Oh this is definitely going on Insta.”

_Shit, why is he doing this? Why did he always have to humiliate him like that? And why does it always make my stomach flutter?_ Robby tried to run back into the house but Roger caught him before he got too far.

“Relax buddy. I’m just messing with you. See?” He waved his phone in front of him. “Already deleted.” Then he looked down at Robby’s skimpy speedos. “You obviously can’t swim in those. Go back and change into your old shorts.”

Robby breathed in relief. Ofcourse, Roger would be cool. He just liked to have his fun, that was all. That's how things were different with Roger. Kids at school would've been merciless and they'd have never let it go. Like the other day, he saw Mark looking at him as he changed after gym class. He could see his mouth slightly open and his eyes fixed on Robby's crotch. _Right. I was smooth the last time he saw me._ Robby turned around and could feel eyes on his butt as he bent down to put on his underwear. That did feel good, to be admired like that (just like Roger said) and Robby felt himself growing harder. He quickly covered himself up before anyone could notice - he knew other kids would start pointing and laughing immediately and then tell the whole school. But Roger wasn't like them. He liked his fun but he wasn't mean - he always let it go quickly and he always made Robby feel better after. 

The next day, Roger took him shopping at the mall. “You should’ve just told me they didn’t fit.” He said. “We would’ve done this ages ago. Listen, you don’t need to be embarrassed with me, okay? You can pick whatever you want. And not just for swimming.”

Robby took him up on the offer. He ended up picking three pairs of shorts – one longer board shorts, another smaller ones and a pair of trunks that Roger said were good for swimming. He also decided to switch out from briefs that day. His mom had always bought his underwear and while he was old enough to shop for himself, he never had any money to do so and he was embarrassed to ask his mom to switch. But Roger got it. And he helped Robby pick out a few pairs of boxers and boxer-briefs. That way, Robby could test them out and see what he liked best.

He wandered into the ladies’ section accidentally and was kind of surprised to see how different it seemed. A pair of lacy undies caught his eye and he reached out to touch them, almost mesmerized. Soft. Silky. Robby wondered how they’d feel against him – under his balls. Like usual, he found himself getting hard again.

“You could get those too, if you like.” Roger said from behind him, leaning down conspirationally. “It’ll be our little secret. And it’ll make your as look fantastic.”

Robby elbowed him without looking, sheepish, but thankful the spell was broken.

“Actually I was thinking about how they’d look on you.”

That earned him a laugh and a playful slap on the butt.

* * *

Another incident happened the next time Robby came over. They’d spent the afternoon having fun in the pool and Roger had sent him to the guest room (Robby still didn’t think of it as his room yet) to finish off the homework. Except, he’d accidentally taken Robby’s bag with him to his own. Robby only realized that when he came out of the shower and saw that he had no clothes to wear. So he wrapped the towel around his waist and went over to Roger’s bedroom. No big deal, right? He knocked and went in after went in after hearing Roger’s voice.

Roger was naked. He had just come out of the shower, clearly and was drying his hair. He couldn’t see Robby because his head was covered. Robby knew he should just walk out right away – or atleast looked away – but he was transfixed. He looked even more amazing than in those pictures.

Roger had his back to him when he came in and Robby got an amazing view of his backside – round and firm and it looked like it was made of stone. He was standing with his legs apart and Robby could see a hint of balls between his legs. The he turned around and Robby saw what he’d always tried – and failed – to imagine. He couldn’t help but compare it to the last grown-up dick he’d seen. Roger had shorter pubes – cleaner, neater, not like the jungle Cody had had. And his cock hung down, long and thick. Probably bigger than Cody’s, even though it wasn’t even hard. The head was covered with skin – not like most of the cocks Robby had seen in showers, but he’d seen a few of those as well. The balls looked big and dangly as well. Robby felt himself get stiff again and thought he must be smaller than Roger was even soft.

“You back early today, Sweathe- Robby!!” Roger quickly covered himself with the towel. Then he laughed. “I thought you were your mom.”

Robby shook off the embarrassment. An accident. It happens.

“I was looking for my bag.”

Roger nodded, looking around. “Oh – there it is.”

Robby fell asleep fantasizing about what he’d seen that day, what it’d look like hard, how it’d feel in his hand. He’d heard (and told) enough up-your-butt jokes to know where it was supposed to go. Would it feel good? He fell asleep trying to imagine that.

But in his dream, he saw Pierre, not Roger. Holding him down. Shoving something hard and painful in him. He woke with a sob, covered in cold sweat. _A nightmare. Just a nightmare. Pierre was long gone and he was never coming back._

Roger and Mom were still awake when he went down to get some water. They were curled on the couch, watching TV. They heard him even though he tried to be quiet and while he tried to play it cool, they must have seen something.

“Honey, you are shaking.” Shannon said, fussing over him. “And you are cold. Are you getting sick?”

He shook his head. He didn’t need to be babied by “Mommy”. “Just a nightmare”, he said.

“Want me to look under your bed?” Roger asked, trying to lighten things.

It should’ve worked. It should’ve made Robby laugh. But for a moment, Robby was afraid of him. Roger was big. And strong. Very strong. If he ever wanted to, he could absolutely wreck Robby. He could hold him down and beat him and shove whatever he wanted in him. Robby shook his head. _No, Roger would never do that._

“It was Pierre.” He said.

He could see his mom tense in anger, but Roger was confused.

“Who’s Pierre?”

“Some asshole I made the mistake of dating in the past.” Shannon said. “He beat Robby up, once.”

_More than once._ Robby thought. _And more than beat._ Roger nodded in understanding and put a comforting hand on Robby’s shoulder.

“You want me to find that guy for you? I could beat him up, if you like?” He asked Robby. “As long as he is not bigger than me. Is he bigger than me?”

Robby laughed, suddenly feeling a lot better. Roger was just joking, he knew, but it still felt good. That was more than his own dad had offered to do. He gratefully gulped down the glass of water his mom brought him. She looked like she wanted to say something, but hesitated. Roger said it first.

“Hey, how about you come sleep with us tonight?” He asked.

“You sure?” Shannon looked happy at the thought.

Roger shrugged. “It’s just one night.”

Robby bristled at that. “I’m not five, okay. I can sleep on my own.” But he didn’t want to. He didn’t want to be alone that night.

“Don’t be a drama-queen. Just come over.” Roger said. “It’ll make your mom feel better.”

_Well, if it is for Mom…_ He fell asleep that night with both of them wrapped around him and he’d never felt safer.

Next morning, Robby woke up feeling really rested. Roger's arm was wrapped protectively around him, holding him close to his chest and he could feel his breaths in hair. it made him feel safe. _Let Gay-Lord try and come for him now. Just let him try._ Robby pushed back a little, trying to go deeper into his embrace when he felt some press against his back.

_Roger,_ he knew. He was hard. And huge. It felt like the thing covered half of his back. It didn’t mean anything, Robby knew. All guys got morning wood. His own was poking out stiffly between his legs. But this could be really awkward. No... more than that, Robby realized with a stab of fear. Brent. It was going to be Brent all over again. How could he be so stupid? How could he forget? He'd done the same thing, crawled into bed and felt him up, gotten him hard and then he was gone the next day. Roger would be too. He sensed when Roger woke up, the tempo of breaths changing. He felt him shift his hips a little and he knew that Roger was aware of his own hard-on. Robby waited for the blow to fall. 

Except, Roger just yawned, kissed the top of Robby's head and got up like nothing was wrong at all. 

* * *

That was the thing about Roger – he always knew the right thing to say and do and Robby could never figure that out. He went into a spiral with every mistake but somehow, Roger always made things okay. It wasn’t even like he was lying to Mom – he told her plenty of stuff. He told her about his modelling and Robby finding the album and she laughed about it. He told her about taking Robby shopping (but not about the skimpy speedos) and she was grateful. He told her about Robby walking in on him and she mockingly told him to be more careful.

There was some intangible like between harmless fun and something more serious, something that always ruined things, and Robby could never figure that out. He felt like he was always crossing it and he had to _know_. He wasn't smart, he knew that. He was never that good at school. But that is why he _needed_ to know this stuff, _needed_ to learn. Smart guys knew this stuff automatically, but Robby had to find out for himself. Luckily, Shannon wasn't one of those moms who hovered and put locks on everything.

So he looked through the internet and found out what he could. He never could look through the long, boring, news stuff, but videos were better. But not by much. Watching videos of people crying about their abuse made him feel contemptuous. Like, let it go already. It happened ages ago - why are you crying about it now? If you were too terrified to say and do anything when it was happening, then aren't you the pussy? Atleast _he_ had screamed and fought back with Pierre and he wasn't sitting around crying about it. 

And Roger wasn't doing anything wrong, he knew that now. He never made him feel terrified or helpless or like he couldn't say anything. He never forced him into anything. Never touched him in a way that made Robby uncomfortable - well, except when they were playing around, but Robby had already seen a lot of videos of guys messing around with pranks and stuff to know that was okay. It was his own stupid feelings that were screwed up here and Roger was nice enough to give him a pass on that. 

Somehow, Roger knew the line between what was okay and what would freak people out – and Robby could never figure that out completely. 

* * *

He sort of got an answer a few weeks later.

Robby let himself into the big house like he had done a dozen times before. And this time, he found Roger in the kitchen. Shirtless. Jeans unbuttoned and zippers down. He had his arms stretched upwards like he was yawning. Robby noticed that he wasn’t wearing any underwear. He could make out the pubes and the curve of his butt.

“Hey, Robby. Were you supposed to come over today?” Roger asked, unfazed. He wasn't embarrassed this time. He just casually buttoned and zipped himself up like nothing was amiss.

“Mom said she was gonna tell you.” Robby replied, trying not to sound weird. Roger looked confused for a moment and checked his phone.

“Yeah, guess I missed the message.” He said. “Oh, right. Robby, this is Joe. Joe, Robby.”

That was the first time Robby noticed the “Joe” in the room – a sandy-haired young man who had been there all along. Robby was confused. Why was Roger half-naked with another guy?

“What’s going on here?” He asked, angrier than he’d meant to be. “Are you cheating on my mom?”

They both laughed.

Turned out, Joe was an aspiring new photographer and Roger was doing some modeling for him. Nothing weird about it. It was just work. Roger wasn’t ashamed of his body, not after he’d worked so hard for it, and Joe was an artist. They were supposed to do a sexy, nude photoshoot, but that obviously wasn’t happening today with Robby around. Robby felt guilty and offered to get out of their hair, but Roger just waved him off. Instead, they decided to just hang around and have a few beers.

“You know, kid, you are pretty good looking.” Joe said, after he’d had a few. “Ever thought of getting before the camera?”

Robby flushed at the compliment. Nobody had called him good-looking before like that. Sure, people had pinched his cheeks and called him cute, but this was different. A serious compliment that actually meant something. Not like guys as school who called him “pretty-boy”.

But still, the idea of dropping trou in front of a stranger…

“No!” Joe objected. “That’s grown up stuff for Roj here. We’ll do more cute stuff with you.”

It started out innocently enough. Joe told him how to pose and make faces. He had him at the kitchen counter eating cereal. On the couch studying. Falling asleep. Jumping around. After a while, Roger got in on it – horsing around with Robby. Ruffling his hair. Hugging him from behind while Robby sat on his lap.

Things got more and more uncomfortable for Robby from there on. Joe had them take their shirts off and flex in different poses. It was supposed to be cute and funny – like a kid trying to mimic his dad. He had Roger carry Robby under his arm. Then in a headlock. Then deadlifting him. _There is nothing wrong here,_ Robby told himself. He'd seen plenty of photos like this before and he had been in pool with Roger before. Still, the two of them shirtless together and Roger touching him all over... well, alteast his shorts didn't give anything away.

They moved to the pool next for some sporty stuff. Joe took pictures of Robby diving in, swimming underwater, peeking over the edge of the pool, doing a cannonball. That one had come out really well, Robby had to admit. He’d caught that perfect moment when Robby hit the surface, water rising around him like a flower, his eyes squeezed and his face comically squished.

Things got really bad once Roger joined him. There was no way the camera missed the bulge in his shorts. Sure Joe was taking pictures from angles that avoided their crotches – it was more “tasteful” that way, Robby had learned – but he was clicking away like a dozen times per second and they were moving all over the place. But Roger was all serious and acted like nothing was wrong. He saw no problem grabbing Robby all over the place – in and out of pool. He held Robby flat on the water, pretending to teach him how to swim and his palm was right under Robby’s groin, actually touching his boner. He gave Robby a piggyback ride, carried him over his shoulders, pretended to throw him in water. All normal, fun stuff, but Robby knew something was going wrong. That he was messing up somehow.

The final straw was Joe telling them to show their butts.

“You two have matching tan-lines, did you know that?”

“Really?” Roger pulled down the side of his trunks looking himself over.

Robby didn’t need to – he’d noticed it days ago. He was getting really tanned from all the swimming in the sun, but under his shorts, he was still milky pale. The contrast only got starker with weeks. He thought his ass really looked sexy like that, but he had no intention of showing it off to Joe. But Joe apparently had no intention of waiting, because he casually reached over pulled down Robby’s shorts. Just the back, the front caught his dick and wouldn’t come down, but there he was anyway, in front of two grown men, ass bare to the sun.

“Dude!” Robby yelled, pulling them back up. “Could you not be such a pedophile?”

The silence that followed told him he’d fucked up again. He looked at Roger, trying to get a hint on what to say next, but got nothing. _Laugh,_ he thought, _laugh it off like you do with everything._ Roger said nothing.

“I should sort this out.” Joe said quietly, before heading inside.

“Roger, I…” Robby started.

“Get changed, Robby.” Roger said, coldly. _He’s mad at me_ , Robby realized. _I said something really fucked up and he’s mad at me._ And Roger never got mad. At anyone. No matter how many times Robby had messed up before, no matter what he’d said or done or been, Roger had always let it slide with a laugh. And now Robby had made the nicest person he’d ever met mad.

Roger wasn’t mad, he told Robby when he came to his room later, he was just disappointed.

“I just don’t get why you’d say something like that.”

_To make him stop,_ Robby thought."He was making me uncomfortable."

"Sometimes it's good to be a little uncomfortable." Roger explained. "If you only do things that are comfortable, you'll never try new things and you'll never be good at stuff. Learning skateboarding was hard right? You fell off a bunch of times and hurt yourself?" Robby nodded. "But you kept at it. You pushed through the discomfort and now you are awesome at it."

Robby was already feeling ashamed now, but Roger wasn't done.

"And if you weren't having fun anymore, you could've just said that. You didn't have to call him _that._ "

“Isn’t that what it means?” Robby asked. “Guys who do that stuff with kids.”

Roger sighed. “You know, you act so grown-up all the time that I sometimes forget that you are just a kid. Listen, Robby, pedophiles are guys who can’t get laid to save their lives. So they go after the easiest preys - kids who don’t know any better. Does Joe seem like that to you? Do I?”

Robby thought about it. It made sense. He’d seen and read about it, after all. He knew what kind of men to be careful about. Pasty white dudes hanging around playgrounds looking at toddlers. Leering bald old priests. Creepy men with vans hanging outside schools offering candy. Joe didn’t seem like them at all. And Roger definitely wasn’t like that. He shook his head.

“And you are a tough kid.” Roger continued. “No one can make you do stuff you don’t want to, right?”

Robby nodded, feeling more confident.

“Listen Robby, saying something like that isn’t just mean, it can actually ruin someone’s life. People lose jobs over stuff like that. They go to jail for it.”

Guilt flooded him. How could he have been so stupid? Especially after going through the exact same thing?

“I-I’m sorry.” He blubbered. “I didn’t realize… I should’ve known…”

“Hey, take it easy.” Roger calmed him down. “What are you talking about?”

Robby took a deep breath and looked at him. Dare he? He didn’t know how Roger would react.

“I messed around with a boy from school, once.” He said in a rush. “It was nothing, just jerking off. But then he told his mom and she told everyone that I was a creep. And now everyone at school hates me.”

Robby waited for… he didn’t know what. Anger? Disgust? But all he got was a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“That wasn’t fair to you. It shouldn’t have happened.” Robby looked up surprised. Did Roger actually understand? Was he really on Robby's side? “Look, if I could do anything about that, I would. But that is why you have to be better, okay? You can’t go around talking about people like that.”

Robby nodded and apologized again. And then he thought of something else.

“Please don’t tell my mom. A-about Mark and what I said today.” He begged. “You can give me whatever punishment you like.” _Even if it’s spanking. I’ll take it like a man this time._

“I’m not gonna punish you. And I won’t tell your mom either.” Roger laughed. “Look, I’m not trying to be your dad, okay? I’m just trying to be your friend and help you however I can. Bros, amiright?” He held up his fist.

Robby smiled, relieved and returned the fist-bump.

“And you really can come for me for anything.” Roger continued. “I won’t laugh at you or judge you for it or tell your mom.”

Robby considered it. He’d been so afraid all this time of freaking people out. And yet, he had just told Roger about Mark and he’d understood that.

“How do you know about what stuff to say?” He asked. “I mean, how do you know what’s okay and what’s not? You told mom a bunch of stuff about me and I was sure she was going to freak out, but she didn’t. And you didn’t tell her all of it.” He didn’t specify what, hoping Roger would understand anyway.

Roger seemed to give it a great deal a thought before answering.

“Well, it’s kinda like this – you know how it’s gross to think about your mom doing sex-stuff, right?” He waited for Robby to nod. “Well, it’s kind of the same for adults. They are grossed out by the thought of their kids doing sex-stuff. And they don’t know how to handle it. So they freak out. They end up doing or saying something that messes things up. They don’t mean to, but they do. But that’s not on you, okay? It’s just better to make sure they don’t find out about it. The rest of it, you just learn as you grow up”

That made so much sense. Robby had never thought about it like that – from an adult’s perspective. But didn’t that mean… that Robby wasn’t the problem? That he hadn’t messed up after all – that the grown-ups had? Could Roger really be right? He decided to test him. To trust him.

“I messed around with this guy Cody once.” He confessed. “It was someone Mom was dating and I jerked him off one afternoon.”

“Really? Wow, cool.” Roger almost sounded impressed. As if Robby had just told one of the guys at school that he’d hooked up with a girl. That was not the reaction he was expecting.

“But then, Mom broke up with him because of it.” Robby finished. He wasn’t sure what he should expect here, how Roger’s logic applied here. Mom never knew the whole truth, he was sure of that and Cody hadn’t freaked out.

“Wait… Cody was that hippie guy, right?” Robby nodded. Roger laughed. “Dude, that was so not your fault. Your mom told me all about him. She broke up with him because he wanted you guys to live with him in a nudist commune.”

Robby was taken aback. He never knew. But still, it didn’t mean it wasn’t his fault for sure…

“It’s place where you’d have to see your mom naked everyday.” Roger explained.

“Ewwughhh…” Robby shuddered.

“But Mom said…” Wait, what had she said exactly? That Cody was a creep? He was if he wanted to live in a place like that with _Mom_. She’d asked if he had touched Robby – but wasn’t that a natural question to ask if a creep has been around your son? “Ohh…”

It was falling into place now. Roger was right. Mom was creeped out at the idea of seeing him naked, just like he was creeped out at the idea of seeing her. But that had nothing to do with what he’d done. Their relationship had just come to a natural end, like he’d always known it would. And it hadn’t been his fault.

“Have you really been carrying that around for all these years?” Roger asked. “That’s why you gotta talk to me about this stuff, kid.”

Robby felt lighter. Better. Like he could finally breathe.

“You won’t get grossed out? Or tell mom?” He needed to be sure.

“Cross my heart, buddy.” Roger held up his fist again. “That’s part of the bro-code.”

* * *

_You lied,_ Robby stared at Roger accusingly, _you promised me and you lied. Why?_ He had been so happy the rest of the day. The guilt he had held on to all this time finally going away. He had apologized to Joe, genuinely. And for once he had felt like his screw-up wasn’t going to ruin everything. But then he had come down to find Mom looking through the pictures. His pictures. The ones from the afternoon, all printed out and blown up.

“Oh, this one’s so good.” Shannon gushed, holding one up. It was Robby looking over the edge of the pool, his arms crossed on the ledge. His hair shone in the sun and his eyes seem to sparkle. “Robby, look at this. You look so handsome.”

The knot in Robby’s stomach loosened as Shannon kept gushing. “Aww.. so cute”. “You two look great in that one”. “Oh, this one’s definitely a keeper”. Soon, Robby was smiling and looking through them with her. They all looked innocent. Even the ones of him with Roger. Like where he was hugging Robby from behind. Or where he had him on his shoulders. You couldn’t tell from the pictures that Robby was hard as rock in them. Maybe they were really all innocent. Maybe it was just Robby making crap up in his head like he had done with Cody.

Roger hadn’t lied after all. He’d promised that he wouldn’t tell Shannon anything that would freak her out and he hadn’t – she wasn’t freaking out. Not in a bad way, atleast.

“Is that all of them?” She asked. Robby wondered. There had to be thousands with the way Joe had been clicking away, right?

“More or less.” Roger replied. “You know how photographers are. They take a thousand pics, but only save the best.”

“Joe _is_ good.” Shannon said. That surprised Robby.

“Mom, you know him?”

She smiled coyly, but it was Roger who replied. “He did a shoot for your mom a few weeks back.”

“Which Robby is NEVER going to see.” She added.

“Joe thinks he could actually get Robby a job at this.” Roger went on. “And if it goes well, maybe even a career.”

“You hear that?” Shannon turned to him. “You could end up being a famous model. Maybe even a movie star. That would be awesome, right?”

Robby didn’t think so. He knew he had been a dick to the guy, but Joe _had_ made him feel weird. He knew he wouldn’t want to spend even more time with him.

“Naah…” Robby tried to sound casual. “I’ll pass.”

“C’mon Robby, this could be a great opportunity for you.”

“I said no, okay?” He replied, a little too loudly. _Shit._

“Is something wrong?” Shannon asked, concerned now, looking between him and Roger. “Did something happen?”

_Shit_. How to handle this? What should he say? He knew that the truth was not an option. This would be one of those things Roger had told him about – the ones you keep from your moms. But what excuse could he give?

“The guys at school already hassle me.” He blurted out. “They call me pretty-boy and say I look like a girl. If they find out about this, I’ll never hear the end of it.”

“Who cares what they think?” Shannon said. “Honey, if this works out…”

Roger came to his rescue.

“It won’t work out like that. Shannon.” He said. “It only works if you are comfortable in front of the camera and you can’t force it. If Robby is nervous, we shouldn’t force it on him.”

Shannon looked at the two of them, frustrated and then gave up. Roger winked at Robby and Robby had never been more grateful. It wasn't exactly true, he knew. He hadn't really been that comfortable, but the pictures turned out good anyway. And Roger did say it could've gotten better with time - and Robby was sure if he'd said that to Mom, she'd have forced him to go ahead with it. But he didn't - he put Robby's comfort first. He could really trust Roger now. He had thought he trusted him already, but now he knew that he was letting his fear and imagination hold him back. Roger had his back.


	9. 13(4)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright people. The fun starts here.

Things evolved over the next few weeks and the more Robby thought about it, the happier he felt. He even told Roger about Brent and Roger had gotten that as well. That wasn’t Robby’s fault either, he told him. Brent was trying to be his dad and not be his dad at the same time and he couldn’t handle that. So when Robby had done what he had, Brent had just freaked out. But that wasn’t Robby’s fault. And Robby didn’t have to worry about that with Roger. Roger wasn’t his dad, he didn't want to be his dad. He was just... whoever Robby needed him to be.

Robby wondered if he should tell Roger how he felt. Roger wouldn’t laugh, he knew. He had promised. But would any good come of it? Roger would be nice, but that wouldn’t make those feelings go away. And it’s not like Roger would ever be interested in him. Why would he be? He was a great, grown-up guy who could get any girl (or guy) he wanted. What did Robby have that would make him interested? And even if he was interested by some miracle, he wouldn’t actually do anything about it. He wouldn’t cheat on Mom – he was too nice for that. He wasn’t Cody.

“Did Cody cheat on you mom?” Roger said, settling into the jacuzzi. “I didn’t know that.”

Robby was confused. _I told him about it, right? Did he forget?_

“That wasn’t cheating, that was just messing around.” He laughed.

“How’s that different?”

Roger gave it some thought. “It’s like, with you and Mark. He did some stuff with you, but he didn’t want to date you, right? He didn’t want to hold your hand or take you to dinner or whatever it is you kids do nowadays. It’s only cheating if you want to date the other person, if you are going to leave your girlfriend for them. But Cody wasn’t going to dump your mom and start dating you.”

That... didn't sound right. The logic made sense, but Robby had a nagging feeling something was wrong with it. That's not how it worked with people, right? He'd seen that a lot of times.

"Yeah, people are messed up like that. They have all these dumb rules about how everyone should be and what they should do - and when you don't fit into that, they punish you for it. You know about gay stuff, right?" Robby nodded. "Well, like 50 years ago it was illegal to have sex with another guy. They'd put you in prison for it. It took them a long time to see how messed up that was - and it made a lot of people miserable. What you did wasn't actually bad, it just felt bad because you were scared of what people would say. Most people are just too scared of that to just do what they want. They just give in and do what's expected of them."

That... sounded right. Mark was dating Missy now, after all. They still didn’t talk to each-other, but he’d seen them around in the halls together. But still… the thing with Cody had been wrong somehow. He had felt it. And if it wasn’t his fault, then it must be Cody’s right? So if he didn’t cheat, what did he do wrong?

“If I had to guess, I think it’d be that he didn’t do anything for you. You were too young to enjoy sex, right?” Robby nodded. “Well, that’s it then. It felt wrong because he was having all the fun and making you do all the work. Ofcourse that would suck.”

That must be it. Sure he had enjoyed learning something new, but it wasn’t the same. Messing around should be fun for everyone, Roger said and he knew about that stuff. He was glad that he had started talking to Roger about this stuff. It was easier to figure out when you had help. He wondered it Roger had ever messed around with other guys. If he might do it again – unless he was too grown up for that.

“Hey, check this out.” Roger got Robby out of his head and switched a flip. Bubbles burst up under Robby’s butt, tickling his thighs and balls on their way up. Robby jumped and laughed. That felt awesome.

* * *

That was another thing that was changing. Robby was getting more comfortable around Roger. Less self-conscious. It did help that he was starting to get better control over his erections. It never happened when Mom was around doing gooey-conoodly stuff with Roger. And a lot of times, thinking about that made hanging out with Roger easier even when mom wasn’t around. Even so, he was usually stiff as a rod and horny as hell when they were alone together. It just didn’t bother him like it used to. He knew Roger knew what was going on under there, but simply ignored out of respect for Robby. And Robby was thankful for that.

Not that Roger had any problem embarrassing him in any other ways. He loved to tease Robby all the time – just not in a mean way. This one time, as he was getting ready to jump in the pool, he felt his shorts being jerked down to his ankles. His dick sprang out and slapped against him. He could hear Roger laughing behind him. _Did he just pants me?_ Robby thought. _He wants me to act like a little kid. To make me shriek and yelp and run around hiding myself. Well, I’m not playing his game._

He turned around shamelessly, not even bothering to cover himself. His small dick was pointing right at Roger’s face. “See anything you like?” He asked, smugly.

Roger looked him up and down, as if considering him. “No. Can’t see anything at all.”

Robby didn’t get it for a moment and then flushed when he realized what Roger meant. He kicked his shorts right at his face and regretted it immediately. _Dumb move, Keene. Now he has them and he won’t let you have them back until he has humiliated you a lot more._ But Roger just threw them right back and Robby put them on quickly.

It felt like Roger was growing more comfortable around him too – as little sense as that made. He’d never exactly been shy, but there was something intangible happening now. Robby had “accidentally” walked in on him changing a couple of times. But he didn’t freak or tell Robby to get out – he just kept going on like nothing was amiss. He walked in on Robby once, while Robby was in the middle of jerking off. Robby had scrambled to cover himself, expecting humiliation, but Roger just told him that he was going out with his mom that night. Roger had always liked slapping him on the butt – playfully, not like Pierre – but nowadays, he started pulling down his shorts exposing his pale ass. Roger already spent most of the day shirtless – before Mom got back, that was – but nowadays, he was spending his time a lot more in boxers. Even briefs, sometimes. Robby could really see his bulge in those and it always made him hot and bothered.

* * *

Robby didn’t know what came over him that day. Maybe it was waiting for Mom to get back to their apartment, but knowing that she was hours away. Maybe he was bored of the book he was supposed to be reading for school. Or maybe he just wanted to pay Roger back for all the teasing. Roger was at the kitchen counter, working on his laptop. He was shirtless, as usual, but atleast he was wearing his jeans today. But no underwear – Robby could see the top of his butt peeking out.

Robby threw a Cheeto at him. No response. He threw another. That got him something. “Quit it. I’m working.”

Robby got up and tip-toed behind him. Reaching out, he pinched his sides. Hard. Roger yelped and practically jumped out of the chair.

"Son of a - "

Robby roared with laughter. _First shots fired. Point one: me._

He quickly turned around and grabbed Robby in a headlock, but Robby was ready for that. He slapped the back of his hand against Roger’s crotch. The grunt and the loosening of the grip told him that he’d found his mark. Robby got himself free and danced away, laughing. _Point two: me too._

“You are gonna pay for that.” Roger said, also laughing and massaging his sore balls.

He was chasing Robby around the couch - first one way, then the other. _I could do this all day. You'll never catch me like - shit._ He reached out across the couch to grab Robby and he yanked him over the back. _He got me,_ Robby thought as he felt himself being pinned to the couch and Roger jumped on top of him. _I won a few battles but lost the war. And now it's time to pay the price._ He hiked Robby’s up to his armpits and started digging his fingers into him, tickling him mercilessly. Robby squirmed, pushed against Roger, trying to escape, but all he accomplished was sliding his shorts halfway down his butt. Roger didn’t let up. His fingers dug all over, in his armpits, under his ribs, in his side, until Robby was laughing so hard that tears streaked down his cheeks.

They laid there like that after Roger was done, panting and out of breath. His evil smile told Robby he wasn't done extracting the toll. Then Roger blew a raspberry on his abs. _That’s crossing a line._

“I’m not three.” Robby said indignantly.

Roger looked up at him and smiled. “No, you are not. You are big boy now, right?” His hand reached down and grabbed Robby’s crotch, massaging it gently.

Robby’s smile died. He hadn't even realized he was hard this time - he hadn't been before. He wouldn't have started this if he had been. But even if he had, he’d have figured Roger would ignore it as always. This was the first time Roger actually acknowledged it. No, it was more than that – more than merely noticing his boner. Roger kept stroking him over his shorts. He leaned in and put his mouth on Robby’s chest, soft wet kisses on his pecs, on his nipples and lower.

Robby stayed frozen for a bit, waiting for the punchline. Waiting for Roger to jump up and say “gotcha” – to laugh this away like he did with everything. When it didn’t look like he was going to stop, Robby pushed himself up.

“Ha, ha. Very funny.” He tried to play it off.

“Doesn’t it feel good?” Roger asked, confused, giving Robby another little squeeze.

_It does. So good. But…_ “You are with my Mom.”

“And I’ll stay with her.” Roger replied. “I explained this, right? We are just messing around.”

Messing around. Right. That’s what this was. It didn’t mean anything. It was like with Cody and Mark. Except, this time Robby got to feel good too. Nothing more. But still…

"Something wrong?" Roger asked, still stroking him softly. "I thought you'd like this."

_Something wrong?_ Robby could think of a thousand different things. But everytime he reached for an objection, he realized he already knew what Roger's reply would be.

_But if Mom finds out she'll be hurt - She doesn't need to find out._

_But isn't it better not to do something that would upset her in the first place? - Do you only do things your mom would like? You are not a mama's boy. You won't have any fun that way._

_Fun, yes, but it's also feels uncomfortable somehow. - Sometimes it's good to be a little uncomfortable when you are trying new things._

_But, everyone says this kind of thing is messed up - It's people who are messed up with their stupid rules. If it feels good, what's so wrong with it?_

_But, it could still get you in trouble - only if you tell someone. And I know you won't. I trust you._

Roger trusted him, Robby realized with his heart soaring. Roger trusted him enough to share this with him and he... trusted Roger too. Trusted him to make him feel good and not just on the outside. Trusted him not to be like others. Maybe that was just it, his history with others making him scared - but Roger was not them and Robby wasn't going to let fear hold him back like a little boy.

A soft tickle to his side brought him back. Roger was looking up at him, softly kissing his belly-button. "Does it feel good? Do you want me to stop?"

"Y-yes. I-I mean, no. I mean..." Robby nodded hesitantly. His voice sounded tight in his chest. It felt so good, Roger's hand pressing his crotch. He'd dreamed about this - so no reason to be nervous, right?

Roger pulled off Robby’s shorts and boxers in one go, leaving him naked from the waist down. Well, chest down, with how his t-shirt was still rucked-up. He put his hand under his butt and hiked his hips up for a closer inspection. Robby felt self-conscious, suddenly. _He has never looked at me like that before - never down there._ The gaze made him even harder and he tried to close his legs. But Roger pried them apart gently, rubbing the insides of his thighs in comforting, soothing circles. It made him arch his back up, pushing his crotch towards Roger.

“Your balls are so small.” He said, taking them in his hand and rolling them around. “And tight. Don’t worry, they’ll grow bigger.” Robby spurted a bit of precum onto his stomach.

“Still not much hair.” Roger ran his fingers through his pubes. “You know, once it really starts coming in, you should trim them. Ladies love a well-groomed guy.”

“Is it bigger than before?” Roger asked, grasping his dick. Robby was oozing precum now and Roger touched his cockhead with his thumb, rubbing and spreading the wetness around. Then he gathered some with his fingers and applied it to the rest of it. His hand felt so big wrapped around Robby’s small cock. It covered the whole thing and then some. “How big are you?”

Robby groaned and shook his head. He’d never measured himself – he’d never thought to.

“We’ll figure it out later.” Roger said, putting his lips back on Robby’s torso, giving him soft licks and moving lower.

_We’re just messing around,_ Robby told himself again. _No big deal._ The thought made him feel better. More into this. And he didn’t want this to stop. It felt so good. Better than he had ever imagined. Roger’s calloused hands felt so different on his skin than his own smooth ones. It was a completely new sensation.

Roger’s lips were finally down, below his belly. He looked up at Robby and smirked. Then he sat up a little, putting Robby’s legs over his shoulders. Then he went back down and swallowed Robby whole in one go. Robby made an embarrassing whimper like sound and bucked his hips up. His toes were curling, he realized and his knees were bending, trying to wrap around Roger, to draw him closer. The wet heat enveloping him felt incredible. Roger had his balls in his mouth too, rolling them around with his tongue. Robby felt a strong suction as if Roger was trying to vacuum his balls through his dick. He tried to thrust himself up, but Roger’s strong hands on his hips held him in place.

_A blowjob,_ Robby realized between short, stuck breaths. _I’m getting my first blowjob._ None of the other boys at school had ever had one, he was sure. No matter how they bragged. And Roger was awesome at it. Not that Robby had anything to compare it to, but Roger was awesome at everything.He moaned, grabbing Roger's hair, trying to push him down and push himself deeper even though there was no more 'deeper' to go. He felt Roger chuckle around his dick and the vibrations made him shudder.

He didn’t last long. Sooner than he wanted, he could feel the telltale tightening in his stomach. He tried to warn Roger but all that came out was gibberish. With a sob, Robby shot his load right into Roger’s mouth. It was the best orgasm he’d had in his short experience. Robby didn’t how many times he jerked or how long it lasted. And even after it was over, he was left trembling and shaking. He looked at Roger, a little guilty about not warning him in time, wondering if he’d be mad.

Roger just laughed, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. “That was pretty impressive for your age.”

Now that it was over, Robby could feel the pleasure receding and shame filling its place. He could feel a flush creeping up his chest. _If Mom ever finds out…_ Roger flicked a finger right at his dickhead.

“Oww… what was that for?”

“To get you out of your head.” Roger replied, flicking him again. “Don’t go spiraling on me, okay. Nothing’s gonna change and I won’t tell your mom. I promise.”

Robby felt relieved. He couldn’t stop smiling as Roger got off of him. He got up too, to get his clothes and Roger slapped his butt, telling him to go clean up and let him finish working.

Roger kept his promise. Nothing was different that night. Robby had been quiet at first, nervous, but Roger and Mom were laughing and joking like always and soon, he found himself joining in.


	10. 13(5)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup - more messed up stuff. Hope no one is missing that.

They messed around more and more after that – once Robby was sure that this wasn’t gonna go wrong.They always started off easy at first - like two guys horsing around - and things gradually got more and more intimate. Robby started feeling a flutter of excitement everytime they made plans for him to go over.

The next time Robby went over for the pool time, Roger grabbed him and pulled his shorts down.

“Your ass is too white. It needs a tan.” He said, running his hands over it. “Swim like that for a bit.”

"We are outside!" Robby whispered, afraid that his voice might carry over to the streets. "It's weird."

"You didn't have a problem the last time - when you showed off your stiff little cock." Roger replied and Robby flushed at the memory. _What was I thinking?_ "Don't worry - No one is around and no one's gonna come around. I've done this a thousand times and it feels awesome." He lifted Robby by the waist and threw him in the pool.

Robby was scared for a while. For a while it felt like the whole world could see him, like he was swimming for an audience and they were all pointing and jeering. But the walls around the house were high and they’d never been interrupted before. He felt his embarrassment fade away and after a few laps, he realized that it actually felt great. The way the water swirled between his legs and around his dick - Roger was right. _He always is._

Roger jumped in after a while too and it wasn't until he was pressed up against his back that Robby realized he was naked as well. And hard. He’d never actually seen Roger hard before, he realized. He couldn’t now either, not with the water making it look wavy and unclear. But he could feel the size against him. He reached down and grabbed it – and it felt like his hand barely covered half of it. He stroked it in awe, with a dumbfounded look on his face.

"You are not freaking out on me, are you, buddy?" Roger asked, lifting his chin up.

Robby shook his head. "Just - you are a lot bigger than me. Down there, I mean."

"You'll grow." He reassured him. "For now, just have fun with it. That's what this is all about, right?"

_Yes, for both of them._ Robby thought. Roger had blown him the last time, but he hadn't done anything in return. Like with Cody or Mark - except, this time it was the other way around. Robby didn't want to be like them.

“I wanna make you cum this time.” Robby said with determination. “You didn’t the last time and we should both enjoy messing around, right?”

Roger looked so proud of him that Robby thought his chest would burst.

“You wanna try something cool?”

Roger put his hands under Robby and lifted him up in water. Robby got the hint and wrapped his legs around his waist and his arms around his neck. Roger positioned his cock between their bodies and pulled Robby in close – tight. Robby could feel their cocks rubbing together and realized how small he was in comparison – Roger started below him and ended above. _He's so big. And Strong. Bet he could do this outside the water too - carry me around and play with me like I'm a doll._

Roger pulled him in even closer as he went in for a kiss. After a peck, Robby could feel his tongue on his lips, demanding entry. He opened his mouth and Roger went in, moving Robby up and down in water against him. Robby wasn’t sure what he should be doing – he’d only ever kissed Mark and that had been nothing like this.

“What’s wrong?” Roger asked, breaking away.

“I don’t know how to kiss.” Robby confessed. “Or what to do.”

Roger smiled at that. “You know, most guys don’t even want to do anything. They just want to sit back and let someone else do the work.” He said. “Just go with your gut. Do what feels right and you are gonna be good at this.”

Roger went back to kissing him and this time, Robby tried to imitate him by moving his tongue as well. Roger moved them around in water, every step rubbing them together. Robby got the idea and moved himself as well, bouncing up and down against him as well as he could from that awkward position.

Roger was hard as steel against him. His whole body was hard and smooth like marble, but his dick seemed even harder. _He could stab me with that thing,_ he thought. And he was moaning now – small, embarrassing mewls that made Roger grip him tighter. He knew he wasn’t going to last long like this and he didn’t. Soon enough, he felt himself spurting underwater.

_I should do something,_ Robby thought _. I can’t just hang here like a ragoll._ Tentatively, he unwrapped his hands from around Roger’s neck, afraid of falling off. But Roger’s hands under him and the water kept him in place. He moved his hands between them, stroking and scratching Roger’s chest. Roger groaned when he pinched his nipple and Robby knew he was doing it right. He reached down between them, grabbing Roger’s dick and his own in one hand. He rubbed it up and down with one hand, even though it didn’t seem big enough, while using the other to explore rest of Roger. After what seemed like a long time of moving about, Roger was cumming too, groaning loudly.

Robby felt a bit sorry about cumming in the pool, but Roger told him not to worry about it. “I told you you were going to be great at this.”

They showered together later and Robby was mesmerized by rivulets of water flowing down Roger’s body. They looked like rivers flowing through mountains and valleys, mapping out every cut of the muscle. Robby could feel himself get hard again. Roger saw him and laughed.

“Man, I miss being your age.” He said.

“Why?” That didn’t make sense. “You get to be so… you.”

“Yeah, but I don’t get to get-off as often.” He looked down, showing Robby his flaccid dick. “See? When you grow up, it can take hours to get hard again. You can be ready to go in a few minutes.”

Robby hadn’t known that. _Roger could teach me so much._

“But I don’t last long.” He complained. “I know I’m supposed to last longer.”

“You just need practice.” Roger replied. “And I’ll make sure to give you plenty of it.”

Roger pulled Robby closer and ran a soap-slicked hand down his back. Robby shivered at the feeling, growing harder, until he dipped in the valley between his cheeks and a finger brushed against his hole.

_No, not that. Never that._

“I think I’m good for today.” He said, trying to sound casual. His hard-on was already flagging. Roger looked oddly at him for a moment, but thankfully let it go.

* * *

Robby didn’t see Roger for the next couple of days and hoped he wouldn’t try that again the next time. Because then, Robby would have to tell him about Pierre. All about him. Robby knew that he could trust Roger, but he still didn’t want to talk about this. Somehow, he felt like he’d be letting him down.

No such luck. Roger asked him as soon as he went over.

“You looked a little freaked out the last time, buddy. Did I do something wrong?”

“No… It’s just…” He tried to sound casual. “When you touched me down there – on my butthole, I mean – I thought you were gonna stick you finger up and that would’ve hurt.”

“I’d never hurt you, Robby.” Roger replied. “And it feels pretty good, you know?”

“No, it hurts.” Robby insisted. Roger might know a lot of stuff about other things but Robby knew about this. “I know it hurts because… ” He took the leap. “Because Pierre did it to me. He spanked me – hard – like a thousand times and then he shoved his fingers in me and it hurt like hell.” He was breathing hard and… crying? Why was he crying? It had happened to so long ago?

“Shh… it’s okay, it’s okay.” Roger pulled him in his lap and rubbed comforting circles on his back. He didn’t make fun of Robby for crying, even though Robby was too big for that. Shakily, Robby reasserted control over his emotions. Roger kept comforting him until he was done.

“Listen, it’s like your balls, okay?” Roger explained. “If you hit them hard, they hurt like hell. But you treat them right and they feel amazing. Pierre was trying to hurt you, alright, but I’m not.”

_No, how did he not get this._ “But it was just one finger. And you are _huge_. You _can’t_ fit it there. Can’t I just blow you?”

“I wasn’t gonna put my cock in you.” Roger said, surprised. “Is that what you thought?”

That surprised Robby too. Isn’t that where it was supposed to go between guys?

“Maybe someday.” Roger replied. “We can work our way up to that. But right now, it's all about what feels good to you. And this will. Trust me. You do trust me, don’t you?”

Robby nodded, unsure. He trusted Roger, he did. But Roger was human too. He could be wrong. But he hadn’t been wrong so far, so….

Robby let Roger pull him on his lap and kiss him. Roger took off his shirt and then his own and went back to kissing him. Then he got up, effortlessly taking Robby up with him. Robby wrapped his legs around as Roger started kissing his jaw and neck. He carried Robby upstairs like that, hands massaging his butt through the jeans and Robby found himself getting harder by the second. _I knew it, I knew he was strong like this. You can just feel the power radiating form his muscles._ It made him feel safe, being held like that, like nothing could hurt him. Once in the bedroom (Robby’s bedroom), he dropped Robby on the bed and pulled off his shoes and socks. Then unzipped Robby’s jeans and pulled them off as well, along with his underwear. 

Robby felt vulnerable like this, fully naked and exposed in front of Roger in his jeans, being looked at hungrily. He could feel Roger’s eyes roaming over him and resisted the urge to cover himself. Roger could do anything to him, he realized. Anything he wanted. He could spread Robby’s legs and shove himself inside and Robby could fight and scream to no avail. The thought made his erection flag. But Roger kept his jeans on and told Robby to turn over.

He could sense Roger moving behind him. His whole body tensed with fear as the bigger guy loomed over him. He felt a puff of breath against the back of his neck before Roger kissed him there. Then he moved lower and lower – on the shoulder-blades, on his back, on his spine, on top of the curve of his butt, - and Robby felt himself relaxing with each kiss. By the time he planted two on his cheeks – one for each – Robby was feeling quite at ease. He didn’t even care when Roger parted his cheeks to take a good look at his asshole.

“You got a really cute butt, you know that?” Roger said. Robby had heard that before. He felt a puff of air right there and twitched – it tickled. Roger laughed above him and blew on him a few more times. _Please let this be all,_ he thought, but he knew it wouldn't be. There were going to be fingers at the very least and maybe it wouldn't hurt like Pierre, but it'd still hurt a little. He trusted Roger but he also knew what he knew. _Maybe it'll be like skateboarding - you get a little hurt when you fall down but you still get back up._

Then he repositioned Robby. He spread his legs apart and lied down between them. He put them on his shoulders, wrapping his big arms around Robby’s thighs and putting his hands back on his ass and spreading the cheeks apart. _Here it comes,_ Robby thought, afraid and clenching again. _It’s okay, you can handle a bit of pain._

Instead, he felt something warm and wet glide over his asshole. Robby perked up, not really registering the feeling. There it was again. _Is Roger kissing me down there? No… he is licking me._ Tongue darting out in broad, wet swipes.

“It’s called rimming.” Roger told him, when he came up for air. “Just focus on how it feels, alright?”

It felt… good? No, great. No, actually… whoa. Was it getting better with each lick? It _was._ The wetter Roger made him the better it felt. He wiggled his tongue against the hole and it made Robby’s cock jump painfully. _Shit._ He’d gotten soft from fear, but now that he was all hard again, it was squished uncomfortably against the mattress. Roger reached down under him and rearranged that as well. His cock was now snug against the mattress and his balls were between his legs, right below Roger’s chin.

This definitely wasn’t normal. It couldn’t be. No one should be able to make someone feel this good. Roger was doing all sorts of things down there, Robby realized. Sucking his balls. Swiping his tongue between his legs. Soft bites between the cheeks. Tongue wiggling against the hole, almost pushing in. And licking… so much licking. He kept changing it up so Robby couldn’t know what to expect and he made him quiver with each move.

What was happening to him? He was moaning, loudly. Almost like he was crying. He couldn’t help these sounds coming out of him. Like those girls on TV when they were acting out having sex – was this what they were pretending to feel? He spread his legs apart wider, inviting Roger closer. He pushed his ass back in Roger’s face and then started humping the bed. The dual sensation was driving him crazy. The warm, soft mattress rubbing against his dick and the wet tongue “rimming” him… the pleasure was almost painful.

“More… please… more…” More what? More tongue? He had no idea what he was asking for. But Roger knew, apparently. He felt the blunt tip of a finger against him.

Robby clenched again, preparing for pain, but there was none. Roger rubbed his finger on him, slowly circling and massaging his pucker until Robby unclenched. Then he pushed it in. It didn’t… hurt? There was pressure and Robby found himself involuntarily clenching – almost spasming – but it didn’t hurt.

Roger waited, finger unmoving inside him up to a knuckle. “Try to relax, okay?”.

As hard as it was, Robby forced himself to ease up. Only then Roger started up again. He put his face back in there, tongue licking the rim right beside his finger. He fondled Robby’s balls with the other four, while Robby rutted against the mattress. His finger dove in deeper – almost completely in now – pressing against the walls of his channel, crooking this way and that and making Robby clench a couple of times. _It’s pretty amazing,_ Robby thought _. He could get used to – Ohhhh…._

Robby gasped and moaned. Roger found something… _inside him_. Some place that sent a jolt of pleasure all through Robby’s body. It made him arch up and push his ass back farther than he thought possible _._ Roger chuckled. “There it is.” He pressed down on it again – hard.

_Too much, too much, too much._ Robby came with a yell. He lay there after he was done, shaking and sobbing with pleasure. _What’s wrong with me today?_ Roger lied down beside him, hand still on Robby’s ass, middle finger gently stroking his hole.

“See? That wasn’t so bad, was it?”

_Not so bad? Not so BAD? I’m gonna kill Pierre for making me too scared for this._

“Does everybody know how to do this?” Robby whispered.

“Not really.” Roger replied. “Most people are grossed out by the idea and won’t even try it. So be careful who you ask about it, okay?”

Robby nodded.

“Okay, your turn.” Roger said, standing up and pushing his jeans to his knees.

Robby wasn’t sure what to do. _Does he want me to the “rimming” thing? Should I get behind him?_

“Just jerk me off for today.”

“Okay.” Robby said, kneeling in front of him on bed. It was the first time he saw Roger hard up close. His cock was really big – Robby could fit both his hands on it. He gave it a few tentative strokes. The skin on top of the dickhead made lubrication unnecessary, he discovered. He pulled the skin back, as far back as it’d go and saw a drop of precum leak out. He looked up at Roger to see if this was okay, but Roger had his eyes closed, breaths coming in hard, so it must be. He started stroking in earnest.

Not enough. It didn’t seem enough. Not after how Roger had made him feel. He was making Roger feel good, he knew that, but just not as good. Roger was still standing up straight and Robby knew he couldn’t have done the same when Roger was doing _that_ to him. He needed to do more.

He leaned forward and kissed the top. He heard Roger’s breath catch at that. Emboldened, he stuck his tongue out and licked the cockhead. Then again, this time, swirling the precum around. He dug around under the foreskin with his tongue and Roger seemed to like that. He felt Roger’s hand on the back of his head, pushing forward, and got the idea. He swallowed the cock, taking it in as deep as it’d go. Roger sucked in his breath and pushed forward.

It was too big to take in completely. Robby got about half of it in before it hit the back of his throat, making him gag. Thankfully, Roger just held his head and didn’t try to push in any further. Robby put his hand around the base – the part that wasn’t in his mouth – and jerked it. With his other hand, he fondled Roger’s balls. He went on like this for a while, taking it out to breathe every now and then. He accidentally scraped his teeth against it once and Roger hissed at him to be careful. He took it out to just lick and suck at the head every once in a while and kept changing hands as they got tired. He kept it up for he didn’t know how long. But Roger’s breathing was getting harder. His chest was heaving and his abs kept getting taut.

Then he felt the balls tighten up. Roger suddenly pulled him off his cock and Robby felt it jerk in his hand. The first shot landed right on his forehead, right on the bridge of his nose, making him squeeze his eyes shut. The next one on his cheeks. Then on his neck. Then his hair. Then Robby lost track as one came after the other, painting his face and his chest. By the time Roger was done, Robby felt like he was covered all over. He knew he should be feeling disgusted, but he felt proud somehow to have made Roger come this hard, even with the feeling of cum rolling down his nose and cheek. Especially when Roger grabbed his jaw, making him look up and smeared it on his lips.

“I knew you were gonna be great at this.” He said. “You look fucking amazing like that.”

* * *

It wasn’t good enough, he thought. And it wasn’t fair. Roger did things to him that left him shaking and trembling in pleasure. Even hours later, he could feel his knees go weak just thinking about them. He did his best and Roger always told him how good he was, but he never him shudder and moan like Roger did. He wanted to be better. So he asked Roger to help him be better. And Roger taught him.

_You need to learn how to take a cock deeper in your mouth. It’ll be tough and it’ll take a lot of practice. It’s called a gag reflex and it feels like you are choking – but if you work at it, you can take in more._

So Robby did. He learned how to breathe through his nose and open his jaw as wide as possible. He learned to keep his teeth away and to hollow out his cheeks to create suction. Soon enough, he was almost taking in three-fourths of Roger’s cock.

Roger _was_ big, he learned. Bigger than average. They measured themselves once and Robby found out that he was eight and half inches. Robby almost felt ashamed of his four inches until Roger assured him that he’d grow bigger.

_It’s not just about the cock, okay. Or the ass. In fact, your hands are actually your best tools. Use them. Move around, Switch things up. Always keep them on their toes._

He learned that too. Grabbing Roger’s hair when they kissed. Scratching his back when he had his arms around him. Stroking his chest, pinching his nipples, moving his hands almost worshipingly down his abs. He rubbed his thighs when he blew him. He fondled his balls, rubbed between his legs, massaged his ass. He stroked his fingers over his asshole, even pushing in a couple of times. But Roger hadn’t liked the last one for some reason. Maybe it wasn’t for everyone.

Roger gave him a tube of lube one day and Robby beamed with happiness. He hadn’t had the courage to buy it for himself yet, so he had stolen a bottle of lotion from his mom’s bathroom. There was so much crap in there, that she’d never noticed.

“It’s not just for your dick, okay? You can use it on your ass too. Loosen it up with your own finger. You’re gonna need to be a lot looser if you ever want to take my cock. So, you know,… homework.”

But that didn’t feel good at all. He tried it a few times, he really did. But he always found himself clenching hard whenever he tried to push his fingers inside. And the amount of lube he ended up using made a mess on his bed. He was almost too ashamed to tell Roger about his failure but Roger laughed that off.

_It’s all in the hips. And not just thrusting. You need to keep them loose and moving all the time. Like you are dancing. Move side to side. Up and down. Clench your butt._

That one was fun to practice. They did it upside down, Roger reclining on the couch while Robby knelt over him, sucking his cock. Robby wiggled his ass in his face as Roger spread his cheeks to lick him open. He worked in two fingers this time, scissoring Robby open while simultaneously stroking his cock. Robby did as he was instructed. He moved his ass around, did kind of a shimmy and twirl thing that made Roger laugh and his dick harden. He kept clenching and unclenching around Roger’s fingers, which Roger said would feel great around his cock one day. He actually asked Roger to spank him, which he did – softly – and he could feel his butt jiggle with every slap. He even kept it up after he came. He told Roger to keep going and Roger played with his softening cock and his hole while Robby sucked him off. Roger came just as Robby was getting hard again, his cum shooting all over his face (Robby had learned to swallow, but Roger said he liked to see his face splattered with cum. Proof of how hot Robby made him, he said.). After that, Roger quickly coaxed a second orgasm from him. 

_Sex is more than about touching each-other. You don’t always need to touch me to make me feel good. It’s also about how you look, how you act, what you wear, where we do it, what kinds of sounds you make. Sometimes, jerking off thinking about that can be better than just someone jerking you off._

That one had unlimited potential and Robby thought he could let his imagination go wild.

He blew Roger off in the car when he picked him up from school. Just unzipped his pants, took his cock out and sucked him off.

He put on those skimpy speedos again, now even smaller on him, and innocently asked Roger to apply sunscreen on his back. He laid down face downwards on the pool chair and shifted and squirmed as Roger eventually made his way down to his ass and pulled them off. Then he moaned a little too loudly when Roger spread his cheeks and applied sunscreen where the sun-don’t-shine.

Roger got this new camera one day and asked Robby to model for him. For a moment, Robby was concerned this meant Joe would be coming back – but no, this was just between them. They started off with Robby changing his clothes a few times. Then he had to drop one item of clothing after another. There were a couple of him in just his t-shirt, his ass peeking out from underneath. Then in different underwear. Then naked, in different places. Then jerking off. Then spreading his ass, showing off his hole. Then with his lips around Roger’s cock. It shoot ended with the same thing as always – Robby covered in cum and looking wrecked. Robby thought it looked kinda nasty – like he was disgusting, somehow, but Roger said it was the prettiest thing ever.

He watched Roger work out, running his hands over straining muscles, licking sweat off his chest. Putting his hands up his shorts and fondling him as he did his pullups. Then he rubbed himself all over his sweaty before painting Roger’s chest and abs with his cum.

_You do need to work on your stamina. And that’s about control. I know it feels like you should get to the good part fast, but trust me, the more you wait, the better it gets. Try this the next time you jerk off- just as you are about to cum, stop. Then when the feeling goes away, start again. Do it as many times as you can._

So Robby tried. And he discovered that if he gripped the base of his dick very tightly just before cumming, he could stop the orgasm in its tracks. He could do it two or three times before it got too much.

But doing that with Roger - or rather, having Roger do it to him was absolute torture. He sat between Roger's legs, leaning back against his chest as Roger softly kissed his neck from behind. One had was on his cock, stroking him very, very slowly and it stopped every time Robby bucked into it. The other was on his butt, between the cheeks, two fingers wet with lube and spit and pushing in and out, only occasionally touching that place inside him. Robby was moaning and squirming, head thrown back in ecstasy, hands on Roger's thighs trying to hold himself steady. He rubbed his back against Roger - against his dick between them - and then reached back to stroke. Roger kept him doing that - kept him like this, wriggling like a worm on a hook for what felt like hours. This time, Roger came first, painting his back in splashes. Within five seconds of that, he got Robby off too, painting his front.

"Good boy." Roger said, spreading it all around his abs. "You are doing so well. You are a natural at this. Like you were made for it."


	11. 13(6)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot longer this one. And full of smut.

Robby got to put the stuff he had learned to test one weekend. It happened pretty unexpectedly. Shannon found an all-expenses paid coupon to a weekend at spa while she was “not-snooping” through Roger’s closet. And it expired in two weeks.

“Yeah, I won that in an office thing last year.” Roger shrugged. “They are not that fun. It’s just for one person and you just end drinking by the pool all day anyway. I can do that at home.”

“B-but… it’s all-expenses paid. Someone is _paying_ you to relax.” Shannon was aghast. “Seems like such a _waste._ ”

“You can go if you like.”

Shannon hesitated. Or atleast, made a good show of it. She’d never left Robby alone for the whole weekend before. ( _Yeah, right!_ ). And who knew what kind of trouble the boys got into without adult supervision. But Robby saw that she clearly wanted to go, so he put on his “teen-face” and told her to.

“I don’t care. I’ll look after Roger if you really wanna go.”

He’d meant it as a joke – a kid-taking-care-of-adult kind of way – and he flushed when he realized the unintended entendre.

So Shannon dropped Robby off at Roger’s early Saturday morning and headed out. She’d be gone for two days, she said, returning on Monday. Robby wondered why Roger simply didn’t go with and buy an extra – ticket? Did you buy tickets to spas? He was certainly rich enough to afford it. But he’d said he didn’t like the spa stuff and Robby supposed that was more of a girl-thing anyway. So maybe it was just that simple. Roger certainly wouldn’t _want_ to spend a weekend with a dumb kid, not when there was a better option available.

* * *

Roger had plans for him this weekend. He was going to see how many times he could get Robby off. But first, they were going to start with a game to see how well Robby could control himself. The rules were simple. Robby had to lie down and let Roger do what he wanted to him. But he couldn’t touch himself – _anywhere_. His hands must be palms down on the bed at all times. And while Roger would play with him, he wasn’t going to touch his cock – not until Robby begged. And not just any begging, he would have to say the exact words – “please sir, touch my cock and let me come.” If he couldn’t do that – if he ended up touching himself or begging, then… well, then Roger would win and he’d know that Robby was a horny little boy after all.

The challenge lit a fire inside Robby. He’d win this, he was determined to win this.

He almost broke down within fifteen minutes, but something in him kept him going. Keeping his hands down turned out to be impossible, no matter how much he gripped and twisted the sheets. He grabbed the headboard and thought he had lost for a moment – but Roger said it didn’t count. The point was not to touch _himself_ with them _._ And Robby figured he could use the loopholes. He grabbed Roger’s head and tried to push him towards his dick. He grabbed him by the shoulders and tried to pull him in for a kiss – or pull himself up against him. He squirmed and shifted, searching for contact. He bucked his hips, trying to get his dick to touch anything but air. He even tried to turn over and rub himself on the mattress.

But Roger was ahead of him every step of the. Robby wasn’t strong enough to actually make him do anything. He expertly dodged Robby’s every move and pinned him to the bed by his hips anytime he tried anything particularly clever. He kept him there like that, not moving, but blowing air on Robby’s cock, making it weep ( _not touching, so it doesn’t count_ ). He kissed and licked and sucked him all over except his cock until Robby’s toes curled. Then he hiked his ass up and buried his face in Robby’s crack. Robby was almost upside down as Roger sat back on his haunches, legs flailing over his shoulders. He could feel Roger lick him open, tongue pushing, demanding entry as a precum rolled down “up” his chest.

Robby was a whimpering mess after half an hour, blubbering out a litany of “ _pleasepleaseplease_ ” and “ _moremoremore_ ”. He almost broke once – “ _please sir, please touch my…_ ”, but Roger looked at him smirking, asking “touch what, Robby?” and Robby found it in himself to say “Fuck you.” Roger laughed and went back to torturing him.

In the end, Robby came with just fingers inside him, pressing down on his prostrate, his cock completely untouched. It was intense, too intense. He found himself sobbing afterwards, crying into Roger’s chest as he held him on his lap, his hand finally stroking Robby’s softening cock comfortingly. Roger was impressed – really impressed. And not just in “indulging the kid” kind of way.

“You totally win, dude.” He said. “I don’t think I could’ve done that at your age.”

* * *

The rest of the day was no less tortuous. Robby was going to stay naked all day – all weekend actually. And he wasn’t allowed to shower or wipe himself. He felt dirty and disgusting, but he stayed covered in his own cum until it dried and flaked off. And Roger was true to his word – he was pushing him to the limits. He made him climax again and again. Robby stopped counting after the seventh time, when Roger sucked him off in the pool, holding him above the water with his legs wrapped around Roger’s neck. Robby felt raw and overstimulated. It stopped being fun but Roger just wouldn’t stop.

_It’s because he hasn’t cum,_ Robby realized. _He’ll lose interest once he does._ But Roger deliberately kept Robby away from his cock all day, telling him it was more fun for him this way. Robby wondered if Roger was planning on fucking him that night. They were almost up to three fingers now. That was the only thing he could think of that they hadn’t done and it did seem like something Roger might be saving himself for.

“No, you are still too small.” Roger replied. “Trust me, it’ll hurt.”

Robby found himself unexpectedly disappointed. He knew it was coming and wanted to get the fucking over with. Roger gave him a mischievous smile.

“Don’t worry, you’ll be fucking a lot sooner than you think.”

But still, he had to do something about Roger. He tried telling him he had had enough, but Roger just grabbed him and coaxed him back to hardness. “Doesn’t look like you’ve had enough” he said as he wrenched another orgasm out of him. Robby wasn’t even shooting anymore. He was barely coming at all, in fact – only a few drops dribbling out the last time. And the orgasms were still intense, but they felt more uncomfortable and unsatisfying.

Robby thought of something finally – something that would get Roger off his back and get him some payback. He dropped a challenge of his own.

“I wanna play the game from the morning again.” He said. “Except this time, you don’t get your cock touched until _you_ beg.”

Roger laughed. “That won’t work. I’m not as sensitive as I used to be. Not like you. You can try that for hours until you are tired and nobody would win.”

Robby thought about it. “Okay, then. How about I don’t _let_ you cum until you beg?”

“And how are you gonna stop me from just jerking off?”

“B-but, that’s breaking the rules…”

“No – the rules are I need to beg you before I cum. So if I just do it without begging, I win.”

Robby felt disappointed. He’d thought it was such a good idea, but clearly he hadn’t thought it through. But Roger looked like he was thinking something.

“Alright. Challenge accepted. Let’s see what you got.”

Roger figured a way out – he let Robby tie him up. He got a bunch of scarves and belts and told Robby to use one on top of the other. That way, it’d be tight enough that he wouldn’t be able to move, but not so tight that it’d cut off circulation. He also told Robby to use an eye-mask as a blindfold – to give him a competitive advantage, he said.

Robby looked at him like that for a while, unmoving. Roger was tied up to the bed, spread-eagled and blindfolded. This was the first time Robby felt like _he_ was in control, like _he_ could do anything to Roger, instead of the other way around. He looked amazing like that, muscles taut, every cut and definition visible, his cock huge, but still flaccid, resting against his stomach.

“You plan on boring me into begging?” Roger asked. Even like this he had all the power. _Well, not for long._

Robby started off with the usual stuff, kissing him first and then nipping and licking his way down the muscular body. He used all the tricks Roger had taught him – and the ones he’d used on him – paying attention to the nipples, looking for spots to make him squirm. Roger was breathing deeply and steadily, sweating a little, but still far from how Robby wanted him.

He didn’t have to play by the same rules though. He could touch Roger’s cock without losing. Roger chuckled as Robby got there, as if he was sure of his victory. _Keep them on their toes,_ he remembered and he kept moving around. Until he felt bored and started sucking Roger off in earnest.

“You keep that up and you are gonna lose pretty soon.” Roger said, tightly. Robby ignored him and kept up his ministrations. _Time to show you what I got._

Soon enough, he felt the telltale tensing of muscles. _Here it comes._ He gripped the cock tight around the base, pressing his thumb down hard on the underside – right above the balls. It jerked wildly, like an animal trying to get free, but Robby held on until it completely calmed down. It gave a few, tired throbs and Robby saw a drop of cum at the tip, fearing for a moment he’d lost. But it stayed down when he let it go – and it stayed hard.

“Where the fuck did you learn that?” Roger asked, breathlessly.

Robby chuckled. _I’m gonna win this._

He started over again. He did things differently this time – he did more. He put his face between the spread legs, rooting around with his tongue until he found “that” part. He sat backwards on his chest, pushing his ass further and further until Roger tried to stick his tongue out and lick him, but Robby stayed out of reach. He was pooling precum all over his abs and Robby spread it around before taking him in his mouth again. Roger was breathing much harder now. Robby even heard him moan a few times and he thrust his hips up into Robby’s mouth. It didn’t take long this time before he was tensing up again and Robby used the same trick to deny his release.

“You little fucker. You are gonna pay for that.”

His threats were hollow, Robby knew. By the third time around, he was moaning wantonly. He was sweating all over and Robby licked the salt off his nipples. He was bucking his hips, thrusting upwards when Robby denied him contact. He got close again – so close – but once again, wasn’t allowed to finish.

“C’mon.” He yelled in frustration. “Finish it already.”

“Not till you say the magic words.”

“Dream on.”

Robby had another idea. He’d only seen it hinted at on TV, but he thought he could figure out the specifics. “Back in a bit.” He whispered and ran out of the room.

“Wha-? Hey, no. Wait.” He heard Roger yell behind him. Then in the kitchen he heard Roger yell again. “This isn’t funny, dude. Come back here at once. ROBBY!!” Laughing to himself, he made his way back to the room.

“Would you chill?” He said when he got back. “I just got a little tired, so I thought I’d get a snack.” _Oh, he has no idea what’s coming._

Roger hissed as the first spoonful of ice-cream hit his chest, right over the nipple. Then he moaned when Robby slurped it off. “You little shit.”

“Uh-uh – no talking with your mouth full.” Robby said as he stuck a spoonful in there. Then he put his dick in there as well. He was hard again, enjoying this game and still a little sore. But it didn’t bother him as much since he was in charge this time. He had been too afraid of the cold to put the ice-cream on himself, but the warm and cold sensations inside Roger’s mouth drove him crazy.

Robby did it again and again, putting spoonfuls all over Roger’s body and licking it off. _Let him feel sticky and icky for a change._ Then he did the same to his leaking dick. Roger whimpered. He actually whimpered. Like he had made Robby do so many times. He had him now, Robby knew. He was moaning. He was sweating and shivering at the same time. He was bucking his hips up hard, almost throwing Robby off each-time. It won’t be long, Robby thought.

“FUCK!!!” Roger yelled as Robby denied him a fourth time. “Alright. Fine. You win. Let me finish already.”

“Uh-nuh. You gotta say the magic words.”

Roger sighed. “Oh god of sex, will you please let me cum?”

“Alright.” Robby replied. He turned around, straddling his waist. He knew they couldn’t have “proper” sex yet, but this was something he’d thought of a while back. He sat on Roger’s cock and adjusted it so that it was nestled between his cheeks. He clenched as hard as he could and started moving up and down. Soon enough, Roger was thrusting upwards as well, almost bouncing Robby on top of him. Robby furiously tugged at himself, thinking of it as a race and wanting to finish before Roger. He won, actually cumming a few drops over Roger’s abs. Soon after, Roger exploded behind him, covering his butt and back in his cum.

That was the end of it for that day. Robby still wasn’t allowed to shower, although Roger did (“Hey! Ice-cream is different.”), but atleast he let him wash off his sticky cock. And he still had to stay naked, but Roger stayed that way with him, only putting on the jeans to answer the door when pizza came. He slept in Roger’s bed that night. Roger cuddled him, still playing with him with his hand between his legs, but atleast he didn’t go after Robby’s sore cock again.

* * *

The next morning, Roger was gone from the bed when Robby woke up. That wasn’t surprising in itself – grown-ups did wake up early after all – but Robby was surprised at how late he’d slept in. Or rather, how late Roger had let him sleep in. He was hard again – as was usual in the mornings – and he almost went to find some clothes to cover himself, but then he remembered what Roger had told him and went downstairs just like that.

“Good morning, Robby.” Roger greeted him from the kitchen counter where he was making breakfast.

“’Morning.” Robby, replied, still trying to rub the sleep out of his eyes.

“Robby, this is Asher.” Roger said, waving towards the dining-table. “Asher, Robby.”

“Hey Robby.” A voice said casually.

_Shit._ Robby panicked. He covered himself and tried to run. But Roger grabbed his arm and held him there.

“The fuck, man. Let me go.” He shouted, trying to hide himself behind Roger, but he wouldn’t let him.

“Dude ease up. It’s cool – we are all guys here. Asher doesn’t mind.”

Asher didn’t seem to mind at all. He gave Robby the barest of glances before going back to his cereal.

“Who the fuck is that?” Robby asked angrily. _Not cool. Totally not cool to let me humiliate myself like this._

“That’s my cousin, Asher.” Roger said. “He’s gonna spend the day with us.”

“Just let me put something on, okay?” Robby begged.

“Dude, we had a deal. No clothes today.” Roger sounded disappointed. “We are gonna have fun all day.”

_Was that still happening? How?_ “B-but…” He waved towards Asher.

“It’s fine. Asher’s cool with it. Right Ash?”

“Hey, I’m Asher.” He finally got off the table and offered Robby a handshake.

_No shit, Sherlock,_ Robby thought, as he awkwardly shook his hand. _Roger just said your name like twenty times. Are you slow or what?_

Asher was a teenager. Sixteen, Robby would’ve guessed. Or maybe seventeen. And he was goddamn good-looking too. Short-cropped blonde hair that were a little darker on the sides. Innocent baby-blue eyes. Pouty lips. No sign of acne that plagued teens his age. And he was built like a football player. Or maybe a wrestler. Broad chest, tapering down to a narrow waist. His legs looked like tree-trunks in those tight jeans. He was about a head taller than Robby, though still short in front of Roger. _Good genes must run in the family,_ Robby thought.

“I need to pee.” Robby said, excusing himself and practically running back upstairs.

_I can’t go back down there like this,_ he thought, sitting on the bed. But Roger had said no clothes and he didn’t want to disobey him. Maybe he could hide in here until Asher went away?

Roger came in and Robby jumped, covering himself again.

“You got some mouth on you, did anyone ever tell you that?” Roger said, without a hint of anger. Then he walked over and gently pried his hands apart. “We need to do something about this problem of yours.”

“What problem?” Robby asked, looking down confused.

“You being so self-conscious all the time. There is no reason to be ashamed of your body.”

He knew that already. But this wasn’t about that. “So I should run naked in the streets?”

“No. But you don’t need to run and hide every time.” Roger explained. “Especially not around guys your own age.”

_Who the fuck here is my own age? Asher is atleast three years older. Can you count to three?_ Robby shrugged.

Roger shook his head. “Hey, how about you take a shower and get cleaned up, okay? That’ll make you feel better. Then come down afterwards for some breakfasts. No clothes, though.”

_Was he serious?_ “What about Asher? Who the hell is that guy?”

“I told you – he’s my cousin and he’s cool.” Robby was still perplexed. “He used to hangout here all the time when he was younger. Like you do. But then, high-school happened and he got a girlfriend and he doesn’t come around as much anymore. I just thought you might like hanging out with someone closer to your age.”

“B-but…” Robby was still confused. “I thought we were gonna spend the day together. Y’know, mess around.”

“We will.” Roger assured him. “Asher can join in. We used to mess around all the time. He’s good at it, just like you.”

Robby still felt weird about this. Guys messed around, right? No one said it had to be just two at a time. And Roger was right – he did need more friends his own age. Maybe making friends with a high-schooler would be just the thing he needed. Asher looked cool enough, atleast. And yet…

What was this feeling? The idea of Roger messing around with someone before him hurt a little. Was it jealousy? That didn’t make sense. Roger was dating his mom and that didn’t make a difference. It was probably the thought that this made him less special somehow. Like if there were others Roger did stuff with, then he’d get bored of Robby easily. Surely there were others who were better at it – especially someone like Asher who was way more good-looking than Robby.

No, he was being silly. Roger had already been with Asher and he still spent time with Robby. That must mean something, right? Still, the idea of messing around with Asher in the mix made him uncomfortable. What if Roger doesn’t pay attention to him? What if Asher is an ass and makes fun of him? What if the two of them gang up on him? Or what if they just ignore him and mess around with each-other?

He couldn’t go down like this, he thought. But he couldn’t stay up either. He was getting hungry. And if he waited too long, Roger would just come up and get him. He knew how that would go – Roger would roll over all his objections and carry him down if he had to, ass hanging bare over his shoulder. But maybe there was something he could do? Roger said no clothes, but he didn’t say anything about towels right? Robby felt good about that after he stepped out of the shower. _Yes, towels didn’t count._

Apparently they did. No sooner than he was back in kitchen that Asher snatched it from his waist.

“Roger said no clothes.” He laughed as Robby covered himself again.

“Something funny?” Robby asked, angrily.

“Nah – just thinking – how I used to be just like you.” Asher replied. “Scared little kid, worried someone will see my pee-pee.”

_Fuck you._ “Easy for you to say with all your clothes on.” Robby’s eyes flashed in challenge.

Asher smirked. Without breaking eye-contact, he bent down and took off his sneakers. Then his socks. He lifted his t-shirt over his head, revealing muscular chest and a perfect six-pack. Still smiling, he pulled off his jeans next, showing off a pair of tight Calvins that showed off his bulge. He stood there like that for a moment, letting Robby stare transfixed at this crotch and then those came off too. He cock hanged loose and flaccid between his legs, the neatly trimmed patch above it darker than his head. He was bigger than Robby, he noticed ( _ofcourse_ ), but definitely smaller than Roger. Asher spread his arms and twirled around letting Robby have a good look.

“See something you like?” He asked.

Robby decided he hated him then. Hated his stupid handsome face, his pouty lips, his toned body, his dumb, perfect cock and his… round bubble butt. Roger has probably already fucked him, Robby realized. That ass looked like it could take it. He has fucked him and that’s why he called him over, to do it again. He was getting bored of Robby not being able to take it and called over someone else.

Asher couldn’t see Roger walking in behind him but Robby did. He looked annoyed. He walked right up to his cousin and put a hand on his butt. Asher yelped and reached behind to grab it. He’d kinda jumped and was now standing on tip-toes.

“I told you to be nice to Robby.” Roger whispered in his ear.

“I was nice, I swear.” Asher said. And then yelped again as Roger did something with his hand. “I was just showing him that he didn’t need to be shy.”

Did Roger just shove his fingers up Asher’s butt? No – he wouldn’t do that. He wasn’t Pierre. He was always so careful with Robby. For a moment, he felt sorry for Asher. But then he saw that Asher was laughing too and that his cock was hardening and figured he must be wrong. It obviously didn’t hurt.

“Okay.” Roger took off his hand and gave Asher a little pat. “Play nice, you two. Get to know each-other. I got some work to finish.”

They stood there awkwardly for a bit after Roger left, both naked and not knowing what to say.

“Wanna go for a swim?” Asher asked.

“Sure.” Robby shrugged.

* * *

Robby decided he liked Asher a little better after talking to him a bit. They played together in the pool for a bit and Asher grabbed Robby a couple of times underwater, which Robby didn’t like, but hey, this was exactly the kind of thing Roger would do. Then they just lounged at the edge and Asher told him all about himself. He answered all of Robby’s questions without a hint of embarrassment.

Yes, he did like girls, but no, he didn’t have a girlfriend right now. He was seeing someone but she’d broken up with him a few days ago. Yeah, he had slept with her a few times and that had been great, but then she started talking about commitment rings and stuff and he just didn’t want to be tied down. And then, when Roger had called him over to meet his awesome new friend ( _“He said awesome?” “Yes, he did.”_ ), Asher had thought what the hell.

Yes, he did wrestle and yes, he did work out a lot, thank-you for noticing. He was on the wrestling team at his school. No, Roger didn’t teach him that. Roger was always more of a skateboarder, but Asher could never stay upright to save his life. Robby skateboarded too? Cool. Maybe he could teach him a few tricks and Asher could show him a few wrestling moves.

Haha… sure he guessed he was popular. Yeah, he went to a lot of parties. Hmm… inviting a thirteen-year old to a high-school party? With all booze and the girls? Maybe. Not sure. He’d have to ask Roger.

No, he wasn’t always popular. In fact, when he was Robby’s age, he was kind of an outcast. No, he wasn’t a loner – atleast he hadn’t been – it was just a humiliating incident at school. He had popped a boner during wrestling practice, which wasn’t unusual – it happened to every one atleast once. But the guy he was up against had been a jackass and he’d rubbed his leg on his crotch until Asher creamed his jocks. They’d called him “creamer” after that. No, he hadn’t really recovered from it. He’d just shifted schools when he got to high-school and started anew.

No, it didn’t still happen. Sure he liked it when someone rubbed up against his butt, but Roger had taught him how to control it better.

Well, yes, Roger did just kinda shoved his fingers up him. Not really though – he’d pressed up against his pucker, but Asher had clenched and nothing had gone in. Yes, it had hurt a bit, but the good kind of hurt. He actually liked it when Roger was a little rough with him. Made him feel like a tough guy, being able to take it.

Well, rough means… you know? Rough. He liked it when Roger kind of “played mean”. Called him names. Slapped him around. Fucked him hard. This one time, he’d invited few of his friends over and they’d taken turns with him. He’d felt so humiliated that he had cried, but then Roger had comforted him and he’d learned to like it.

Yes, Roger had fucked him in the butt. A lot of times. First time? Hmm… maybe when he was twelve. Yes, it had hurt bad the first time, but Roger had apologized and been more careful after that. No, ofcourse he wouldn’t do something like that on purpose. It had been an accident. And it’d started feeling so good after a while. He was prepping Robby slowly? That was good. He must really care for him. Asher was a little jealous, actually.

Well, Roger mostly just fucked him. And he liked that. Robby did what? Wow, dude, that’s amazing. Asher would’ve never thought of something like that. No wonder Roger called him awesome.

No, he didn’t know of any other guys, but there must have been. Roger must have learned all this stuff from someone. Pretty sure there would’ve been guys at his school and college. No, Asher didn’t mess around with any other guys – not after what had happened with wrestling. His reputation wouldn’t survive another hit. It’s so easy for people to get the wrong idea that you can only have this kind of fun with someone you trust.

They talked like that for what felt like hours and Robby started feeling more comfortable around the guy. They had a lot in common, he thought. He’d stopped hiding himself a while back and now he could even see Asher’s appeal. He was even feeling better about Roger. There was no need to be insecure at all – Roger clearly liked him if he was telling everyone how awesome he was and doing so much to make sure he wouldn’t get hurt. After a while, Roger called them in for lunch.

* * *

The thing was, Robby didn’t know how it was supposed to work with three guys around. Should he focus on Roger? Would it be rude to not focus on Asher? Where would what go in this situation? Roger was obviously going to fuck Asher, but what should he be doing? Let Asher do stuff to him? The thought made him uncomfortable – he’d just met the guy after all.

Asher didn’t seem to have the same problem. He acted like… he was horny? Sure, but more than that. Like he could barely control himself. Robby found himself feeling a bit embarrassed for the guy. He’d been horny around Roger plenty of times, but he’d never acted like _that. Except when you wore those speedos and asked him to put sunscreen on you,_ Robby remembered with a flush of humiliation. 

_Slutty_. That was the word Robby was looking for. Asher was acting slutty. And he looked like such a big, tough guy that it didn’t seem to suit him. Atleast Robby had had the excuse of looking like a girl. It was completely different from how cool and “normal” he’d been at the pool. Robby wondered if he’d get like that too and the thought made him uncomfortable.

Asher played footsie with him under the table during lunch. After a while, he just grabbed Robby’s foot and put it on his crotch, moaning loudly. But Roger didn’t seem to notice. Later Roger turned on the TV and they decided to watch that for a while. Asher seemed antsy. He kept stroked his cock fully hard. He kept shifting in his seat letting out soft gasps as he pinched his nipple. But Roger never looked away from the news once – even though it was some boring stuff about the weather. He started talking to Roger, asking if his "cuz" has been working out more and if they could do it together sometime. And there was this sick wrestling move a guy pulled on him called a banana-split where he was pinned down, legs spread with his crotch almost shoving in his own face. He had been sure that one of the guys would just walk over, rip his singlet and fuck him right there in front of the class. Roger just ignored him. Robby wondered what Roger had planned in his mind and when the games would actually start.

_This is the game,_ Robby realized with a start. A game of who breaks first like they’d played yesterday. Which Robby had won, both times. And Asher was losing, badly. _Well, I can play too,_ Robby thought and looked away.

After getting nothing from Roger, he turned towards Robby. He told Robby how pretty he was. He complimented him on his developing muscles. Offered to work out with him some time – “You’ll be bigger than me in no time and look how ripped I am.” He admired Robby’s cock – he’d seen plenty of cut ones, but none as beautiful as Robby’s. He himself was uncut, just like Roger. Had Robby noticed that? He was stroking his dick inches away from Robby’s face.

But Robby had figured out the game and he didn’t react beyond grunting in acknowledgment and keeping his eyes focused on the TV. Of the corner of his eye, he saw that Roger was smiling softly. Their eyes met and he gave him a wink, telling Robby that he was doing the right thing.

With a huff of frustration, Asher gave up. He jumped on top of Roger and straddled his thighs. He started kissing him and rubbing himself against him. “C’mon cuz, gimme something.”

“You never could last, could you?” Roger laughed. Robby finally looked over, unsure where he stood in this game now. He could see Roger spreading and massaging Asher’s cheeks over his lap - the puckered hole in between winking at him.

They went on like that for a while until Roger lifted his hips and shucked down his jeans to his thighs. He turned Asher around on his lap so that he was facing Robby now. Roger’s own cock nestled rose up from between Asher’s legs so that they almost seemed side by side. Roger stroked them together with one hand, played with his nipples with another and kissed his neck with his mouth.

Asher was moaning, loudly and moving up and down. Robby could feel himself getting angry at him again. _Did he have to act like that? He was taking up all of Roger’s attention._

“Get in on this, Robby.” Roger said, winking at him again. He shook Asher’s cock to draw Robby’s attention downwards and then pressed his thumb against the base. _Oh…_ Robby knew what to do next.

Roger pushed his hands between Asher’s legs and pushed him upwards until he was kneeling and Robby knelt against the couch until Asher’s dick was at eye level. After examining it a bit with his hands, Robby swallowed it whole. Asher was smaller than Roger, which meant that gradually, Robby was able to take it all inside. Which left his hands free to do other stuff – like stroke Roger. Asher moaned louder and louder as he thrust into Robby’s mouth while grabbing the back of his head. He was moving his hips around and Robby realized that he’d learned the same lessons from Roger.

“Finger me, please.” Asher begged.

“Not yet.” Roger replied. His hand was between the cheeks, rubbing against the pucker, but not pushing in yet.

Soon, Asher went tense and still and it took Robby a moment to realize what was about to happen. He quickly brought up his hand and squeezed the cock tight between his thumb and index finger. Asher whined - a high sound that even Robby would’ve been embarrassed to make – and his dick jerked in Robby’s mouth a couple of times but nothing came out.

Robby pulled off, looking up for approval and saw Roger looking at him proudly.

“I told you he was something.” He whispered in Asher’s ear.

Asher’s thighs quivered for a moment before giving away and he fell back into Roger’s lap.

“Ready for ass-fucking?” Roger asked, looking at Robby. “I told you you’ll be doing it sooner than expected.”

Was that why Roger had brought this guy over? To start Robby off easy? Robby looked back down at Asher – he _was_ smaller than Roger, so he _could_ fit. But he still looked pretty big and Robby had wanted his first time with someone he trusted – with Roger. Roger must have seen his look of trepidation because he chuckled again.

“No dude, I’m saving that for myself.” He reached out and grabbed a handful of Robby’s cheeks. “Today, you get this.” He jerked his head towards Asher.

_So I get to fuck Asher? But… I don’t know how._

He wasn’t the only one skeptical. Asher’s eyes flew open and he looked back at Roger. “What? No way.”

Roger threw him off his lap so he fell sideways on the couch, face down. Just as quickly Roger had his left arm wrapped around his waist, dragging him back closer, making him push his ass out. Robby looked down at it and Roger used his right hand to spread the cheeks.

“Take a good look, Robby.” He said. “This is what a well-fucked ass looks like. Ash just loves taking it up here.”

For a moment, Robby felt uncomfortable. This “mean” side of Roger was new to him. But then he remembered – Asher liked it when Roger treated him like that.

“Yeah, from guys who are bigger and stronger than me.” Asher replied. “I’m not gonna play bitch to some kid.” He craned his neck backwards to look down at Robby. “I mean, just look at him. He’s so small that I probably won’t even feel it.”

Robby felt his anger bubble up. He didn’t like being treated as a child and he didn’t like being reminded of his size. He slapped the ass in front of him, hard. Asher yelped.

“Did you feel that… bitch?” Robby growled, landing a slap on the other cheek.

Then he hesitated, remembering his own experience. He looked at Roger for approval and Roger nodded at him. Asher groaned and pushed his ass further back, clearly eager for more.

_Well, if that is how it’s done…_ Robby started spanking him in earnest, while Roger held him in place. Asher let out short gasping breaths with each slap. Robby was careful though. He didn’t want to be like Pierre. He never hit as hard as the first one. Hard enough to sting for a second, but not enough to actually hurt. It should just feel warm after. Roger had told him that a few days ago, but figuring out the right force was tough. He relied on the sounds Asher was making to decide.

Once his hand started getting tired he stopped. He grabbed the red cheeks in front of him and spread them, exposing the puckered entrance. He looked at Roger for permission and once he got it, dove in face first.

He’d never rimmed anyone before, not properly. Rooting around like a pig for truffles under Roger didn’t count. He wasn’t sure he’d be able to do it properly. So he just did what he could remember from his time with Roger. He licked and sucked. He nibbled at it. He blew on it. He wiggled his tongue and felt the opening unfurl around it. He must have been doing something right, because Asher moaned louder and he couldn’t stop wiggling and squirming, smearing Robby’s own spit on his face. He found that annoying, so he gave a couple of slaps to make him stop. That only made it worse.

“Oh shit.” Asher groaned. “You taught him that? You told him about… Ahhhunghhhh….”

Robby felt Roger’s hand on his shoulder and smiled. He brought his hand up, rubbing his index finger against the furl and pushed inside. The ring of muscle gave him barely any resistance at all as he slipped inside. _Warm. Moist. Almost silky soft._ He pushed in a second one and it went in pretty easy as well. Belatedly he realized he had no idea what to do next. He pressed his fingers against the walls experimentally.

“Look for a little bump or a nub. You’ll know when you feel it.” Roger instructed. “And stretch him up a bit too - make him nice and loose.”

Robby got to work. It took a bit of digging, but his nail pressed into something and Asher cried out. So he pressed down again and again. He slipped in another finger – and then another – and spread them apart as far as they’d go.

“Jesus Christ.” Roger said in wonderment. “He’s practically fisting you, Ash. You think he can get his whole hand in there?”

Asher shook his head vigorously. “No. No more please. I need the real thing.”

“You heard him.”

Robby took his hand out and Roger pushed Asher down until his ass was at level with his crotch. Robby was about to use spit when Roger grasped him with a lubed up hand. He let go after getting Robby properly wet and wiped his hand on Asher’s ass. Robby spread the cheek with one hand and tried to guide himself to the hole with the other. He missed the first time, hitting something else entirely. He tried again and he thought he’d found it, but when he pushed, his dick slipped and went under.

“Here, you spread his cheeks and I’ll guide you in.” Roger offered. Robby did as he was told and felt Roger guide him to the entrance, the rim clenching a little on his tip. “Now push in hard in one jerk.”

He did and both he and Asher groaned in unison. Robby could feel the silky muscles inside spasming around him. He waited for Asher to adjust.

“Don’t worry, you are not big enough to hurt him.” Roger said. “Trust me, he has taken bigger with less prep. And he needs it to be hard, don’t you Ash?”

Robby saw him shaking and nodding and went for it. By the way Asher was moaning with each thrust and pushing himself backwards, Robby figured that he was doing pretty good. He remembered Roger’s lessons and used his hands, pulling Asher’s hair, pinching his side, twisting his nipples, before finally reaching under and stroking his cock. Asher gasped and whimpered with every new move.

“You fucker… unghhh…. Teaching him stuff like that…” Asher moaned.

He was dominating the bigger boy, Robby realized. Asher was bigger and stronger and yet, completely at his mercy. It was a heady feeling, this rush of power. He didn’t know what came over him as he thrust even harder.

“You feel that now, you slut?” He wheezed, slapping Asher again. “You feel this little boy wrecking your ass, huh? Not so small now, is it? Not if it can make you moan and whine like a bitch in heat.” He didn’t know where half those words had come from. He’d never even heard them in his own head.

But Roger chuckled and Asher groaned out “Go fuck yourself.”

That gave Robby an idea. He stopped, which made Asher whine. He moved his hips slowly and deliberately, but started jerking his hand faster.

“Move. Please, move.” Asher whined as he pushed his ass back. “Roj, make him move. Please.” But Roger was looking at Robby in curiosity and interest and didn’t say anything. Robby’s hand was almost a blur and soon he felt Asher tense up like before. This time, he pinched the top instead.

He had thought of this once before while jerking Roger off. He’d noticed that he had foreskin that almost came all the way to the top and every time he pulled it upwards, it closed over the head. He had wondered what would happen if you somehow kept it closed right when someone came. Would it all just go back in?

He had his answer now and he leaned downwards to take a look at his handiwork – the top of Asher’s dick looked ballooned up, skin taut and stretched under Robby’s fingers. Robby cupped his palm under it and slowly released his fingers. Cum flowed out like from a faucet right into Robby’s hands. He noticed that both Asher and Roger were looking down as well.

“You _did not_ teach him that.” It was a statement.

“No, I didn’t.” Roger was awed as well. “Told you, kid’s really something.”

Robby beamed with pride, but his work wasn’t done. He’d slipped out of Asher when he’d bent over, but that worked just fine. Some of the liquid had already overflown his palm, but he was careful not to spill more. He scooped some up with two fingers and shoved then inside Asher. Then he did it again with three fingers. A few more of those and most of it was inside Asher. Robby smeared the rest between his cheeks.

“I call this “Go Fuck Yourself”.” He said, smirking.

Asher kept looking at him in shock, mouth hanging open, but Roger started laughing. And kept laughing. Robby basked in that as he pushed himself back in. This time, he got in one try. He grabbed Asher by the hips and started thrusting in forcefully. Asher responded by moving his ass well, clenching and unclenching. Soon enough, Robby emptied his balls inside him, painting his walls and mixing his cum with Asher’s.

Robby almost pulled out, leaving just his dickhead in, and reveled in the feeling of Asher trying to suck him back in. Then he pulled out completely and saw the hole spasm. A bit of cum leaked out and he used his finger to push it back in. His own dick looked slick and shiny,

Roger patted his shoulder. Then he moved Asher by his hips until his ass was pointed at Roger’s cock. He thrust in in one smooth motion that belied years of practice and Asher keened and sobbed from overstimulation.

“You can go clean that up in you like.” He said, looking at Robby’s dick. “You’ve earned that and more. I’m not done with this bitch yet.” He slapped Asher’s ass.

Robby had another idea at that. He grabbed Asher by the hair and turned his face towards him. It was tear-streaked and his soft lips were trembling. His eyes looked up to Robby in fear and anticipation.

“You heard him.” Robby said, wagging his dick in front of his lips. “Clean it up.”

Roger chuckled again and Asher surged forward to swallow Robby’s cock. _He sucks better than Roger,_ Robby realized. He had been softening, but Asher’s talented tongue made him hard almost instantly. He grabbed him by the ears and started thrusting again. Behind Asher, Robby saw Roger grab his hip and slam hard. He reached down with another hand and started stroking Asher to hardness again.

“Hey Robby, guess what?” Roger said. “This is called spit-roasting.”

Robby nodded. Roger looked amazing like that, muscles glistening with sweat. He saw a drop roll down his forehead and fall onto Asher’s back where sweat was already pooling. Asher’s ass looked big from this angle, bigger since it was being split apart by Roger. Robby could see Roger’s muscles ripple with every thrust and wondered if it would be like that when he finally fucked him. Each stab made Asher squeal, which sent vibrations up Robby’s dick all the way down to his toes. Asher came again, Robby could tell from the way his butt clenched and quivered and the high keening sound from deep in his chest. The tremors from that sent Robby over the edge as well and he emptied his second load down Asher’s throat. Roger stopped as well, looking at his hand covered in Asher’s cum and for a moment Robby thought he had come too. But it didn’t look like it. He just wiped his hand on Asher’s thigh. Robby pulled out of his mouth with a plop.

“Shame to waste more.” He said to himself. Then he leaned forward. “Ash, you got what I told you to?”

Asher nodded. “In my bag.” He croaked out. “By the door.”

“Robby, could you get that?” Robby nodded and ran over to bring the bag back. He ruffled through it on his way back but couldn’t see anything special. But Roger took it out right away. It was a round, black, conical egg kind of thing with some sort of handle at the bottom which Roger held with two fingers. When Roger handed it to him, Robby felt like it was made of some kind of velvet rubber. It was about the size of his palm.

“Put some lube on that while I finish this slut.” He said, jerking his head towards the table.

Robby found a bottle of lube there and did as he was told. By the time he handed it back, Roger was unloading inside Asher. Asher looked like he was falling down, finally done, but Roger held him up with one arm around his waist. Once he pulled out, he immediately pushed that black thing inside Asher, finally letting him collapse.

Later, all three of them relaxed on the couch. Roger was sitting and Asher was lying front down with his face in Roger’s lap, slowly licking his soft cock. Robby was sitting on Asher’s back and every now and then he felt Roger reach over and fondle him. But he was engrossed with examining the butt-plug peeking out from between the plump cheeks.

“It’ll keep the cum in.” Roger had said. “Cum from all three of us. Ha – “Go fuck yourself”. That was inspired. And then, when he want to use this ass again, we can just pull it out and push in. No prep necessary. I was going ask you if you wanted to use it, but after the way you studded this bitch, that just feels wrong.”

Robby turned the thing with his fingers – pulled and pushed a little. Every now and then, it made Asher gasp.

“Hey Robby.” Asher said lazily. “You can come to one of my parties anytime.”

* * *

Later that night, after Asher left, limping, Roger pulled Robby into his lap and slowly started stroking him and kissing his neck.

“You know, you were amazing this weekend.” He whispered in his ear. “Way beyond my wildest expectations. The things you could think of… wow. Just wow.”

Robby basked in the praise, but he still felt a pit in his stomach.

“I think you deserve a reward for being this awesome.”

There it was. _What reward? You already made me cum like a thousand times. Any more and my cock will fall off._

“I’m thinking of taking up skateboarding again.” Roger continued. “Maybe that’s something else we can do together. I was thinking of building a half-pipe in the backyard. I have enough room. What do you think, huh? Is that something you’d like to do with me?”

Robby turned to look at him, eyes wide as saucers and mouth hanging open. That. Sounded. Awesome.


	12. 13(7)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final installment of 13 series. Finally. And it all comes crashing down.

The half-pipe took a week to build. It lasted two days. And it was torn down in an afternoon. Robby despaired at seeing a week’s worth of hard-work go into the trash, but it wasn’t like he was in any position to object.

It had to go, Shannon insisted. That thing broke her son’s arm. As long as it was there, Robby couldn’t go over.

Roger looked so guilty, but Robby didn’t get what the big deal was. It was just a small fracture and the doctor said it’d be healed in few weeks. Roger insisted on paying the medical bills, but that didn’t make Shannon any less angry at him. Sometimes Robby didn’t get his mom. It wasn’t Roger’s fault. He was the one who fell.

“You are just a kid, Robby.” Shannon insisted. “He should’ve known better.”

“It was no one’s fault, okay. Do you know how many times I’ve fallen down already? This was just bad luck.”

Still, Shannon persisted in her anger – for a few days. Between Robby defending him and Roger apologetically waiting on them, it didn’t last long.

In truth, Robby really didn’t think it was so bad. Once the pain and the discomfort subsided, he found out that there were advantages to having a broken arm. People treated you nicer at school. Teachers gave you a break from homework since it was your right arm. You got a break from all your chores. And everyone at home waited on you hand and foot.

One glaring drawback, ofcourse, was that Robby couldn’t jerk off anymore. And for a teenage boy, that could’ve been hell, if not for Roger. Roger took care of that, like he took care of everything.

“Ofcourse, bud. You know I got your back.” Roger was lying down between his legs, lazily sucking him sucking him off. He was slowly fingering Robby open and crooked them inside him, pressing that spot that left Robby a mess.

Robby gasped and bucked, pushing himself deeper inside Roger.

“Hey, guess what?” Roger said, smiling. “I’m already three fingers in. Soon, you’ll be ready for the real thing.”

Robby stomach clenched, fluttering with nervousness. _Soon, yes soon_. He’d wanted it for a while. Or he thought it did. But after seeing how it’d made Asher – all desperate and needy – he wasn’t so sure anymore.

* * *

“He’s cheating on me. I know it. I know he is.” Shannon paced around the apartment, nervous, angry, rambling. “He’s never in mood for sex any more, but he always stinks of it. He’s always taking showers. He is always suggesting weird kinks to me and I know he didn’t think of those himself. He has a folder on his computer and he won’t let me see what’s inside. And I know it’s not porn, because I found that already. And today, I found a hickey on him and I know I didn’t give it to him. He’s definitely cheating on me.”

Robby felt cold and numb all over. He could feel sweat building up on his forehead and rolling down the back of his ear. His throat was dry and stayed that way no matter how many times he swallowed. He tried to speak, but no words would come out.

“Well?” Shannon swirled towards him.

_Well what? Why is she asking me? She doesn’t know does she?_

“What do you think?” She said, oblivious to Robby’s obvious guilt. “I’m not going crazy, am I? I have all this proof. It has to mean _something_.”

“I-I d-don’t know.” Robby choked out.

“Ofcourse not. You are just a kid.” She sighed. “But I do. I know the signs. And I’m not going to be one of those women who ignore it.”

Robby swallowed and finally found the courage to speak. He couldn’t let Mom mess this up.

“Don’t do anything rash, okay?” He said thickly, “Roger is a good guy. He’s not like Pierre. Or Cody.”

“Cody…? What? Cody didn’t cheat on me.”

_That’s right, distract her. Make her focus on her old bad relationships so she sees how good she has it now._

“No – he was just a creep who asked you to move to a naked place.”

“Robby, what the hell are you talking about? I broke up with him because he said something weird about you. Something you did or should do – I don’t remember.” She shook her head. “Don’t distract me, okay. I need to figure this out.”

_What?... no. But Roger said… NO!_

“Don’t freak out, okay.” He had an idea. “It was just a hickey, right? Maybe he was just messing around with someone.”

“Yes, that’s what cheating means.” Shannon snapped.

_No, no, it’s not the same. Roger said so._ “They are different., right?”

“Don’t play dumb, Robby.” She was getting exasperated. “You watch the shows. You read the books, You are smart enough to understand that if someone is doing anything sexual with someone else behind their partner’s back, they are cheating.”

_No, there is nuance. Roger had explained it so well._ “But Roger said…”

She turned on him again. “What did Roger say?”

“Th-that if you are just messing around and not leaving them it’s not cheating.” No, that wasn’t right. He’d explained it better.

“I KNEW it.” Shannon yelled. “Oh, that bastard!”

_What? What did she know?_

“Wait, when did he tell you that?” She looked at him suspiciously. “Do you know anything about this? Did you see someone?” Robby shook his head. “Don’t lie to me! Tell me, did some girl come over?”

“No! Never! I swear.” That much was true, atleast. “It was just guy talk.”

The answer seemed to satisfy her. “Listen, Robby, anyone who says stuff like that IS planning on cheating. They are just making crap up to justify their bad behavior. You should never believe their lies.”

_No. That’s not true. It can’t be. Because Roger said, he said…_

_Roger lied. He lied about Cody and he lied about messing around and who knows what else._

_He wouldn’t. He’s a great guy and he cares about me. He wouldn’t lie about stuff like that._

“Men are pigs.” She was still oblivious? How could she not see the guilt written all over Robby’s face. “They are pigs who’ll do anything to get off. Don’t you turn out like that, honey.”

_But I already am. Can’t you see that? I like sex. I like what he does to me and he likes what I do to him…_

_Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit._

_Roger did cheat on Mom… with me. Which means I cheated too. I am breaking Mom’s heart and she doesn’t even know._

_No, it’s not my fault, it’s Roger’s. He lied to me. He said it’s okay. He made it sound like…_

_But you knew. You always knew. Don’t hide behind Roger. You believed him because you wanted to – because you couldn’t wait to get in his pants. You were so desperate to get off that you lied to yourself._

“But he seems so nice.” Robby said, lamely.

“Guys are weak.” She said in contempt. “It’s the girl’s fault, really. They throw themselves at men, seduce them and men are just too weak to resist. I bet it’s that skank, June.”

“June?” He’d never heard that name before.

“Some slut he works with.” Shannon supplied. “Short hair, big boobs, you sure you haven’t seen her around?” Robby shook his head. “Well, she was always after Roger. She’s always wearing those tiny little dresses. She’s always laughing around him and touching him. She is shoving her boobs in his face. I mean, like, have some class, please. That’s how it works, you know. They parade around with their tits out, practically humping everything near them. They send all these signals and they’re like dog-whistles. And men just run after them, wagging their tails.”

Robby gulped. _No, no, I didn’t meant to._

_Yes you did. You did everything your mom says and more. You were always laughing around him, touching his big muscles. You pranced around him in those skimpy undies. You practically shoved your hard dick in his face every single day. You even ran bare-ass naked in front of him. What was he supposed to think?_

_I didn’t know. I didn’t know that…_

_You knew. You knew where it was headed because you’ve been there before. And you did it anyway._

_But Roger said that wasn’t my fault._

_Roger lied._

“I’m gonna tear that skank a new one.” Shannon rambled on.

_Say something. This is getting out of hand. Say something before it gets worse._

_No, no I can’t. She’ll hate me. She’ll hate me forever._

_Then fix it. That’s your only hope now. Figure something out._

“Mom, don’t do anything stupid, okay?” Robby pleaded. “Things are good now, so let’s not ruin it.”

_You’ve ruined it already._

“You think I should just stay with a guy who cheats on me?” Shannon was incredulous.

“You don’t actually know he is cheating. You just have suspicions, okay? Don’t throw it all away for that.” _Yes, she doesn’t actually know anything. I can fix this._

“Honey, you don’t understand…”

“No, mom, listen. You always say you want a good man to take care of us. Well, Roger does take care of us. So just – give him a chance, alright?”

It wasn’t fair. He wasn’t being fair to her. But this could fix everything. If Shannon would just let this one go, then things could go back to normal.

“So I should just pretend everything is normal and let him cheat on me?”

Robby had no answer for that at first. _Think. Think. Think._

“Maybe just hint that you know what he is doing.” _Yes, this could work._ “He’ll just stop and things would go back to normal.”

_Yes, this could work. Roger loved Mom too and he cared about him. He’d get the hint and they’d stop messi… cheating._

Shannon mulled it over. “It could work.” She got her phone out and typed something in.

“What are you doing?” Robby asked, nervous.

“Just sent him a text. “I know what you did. You better have an explanation.””

_No, no, no. That was wrong. That was more than hinting. That made it sound like she already knew._

_It’s okay. It’ll be okay. Roger is a smart guy. And apparently, a good liar. He’ll figure it out. He’ll say something to calm Mom down and she’d forgive him and…_

_And I’ll behave. I swear if this works out, I’ll never do anything bad again. Please God, just let it work out._

Shannon was staring at her phone in shock. “He _blocked_ me. That asshole just _blocked_ me.” She turned to Robby. “Well, you need any more proof?”

_Crap._

* * *

Shannon lost her job two days later. It had been a good one too, an assistant position in an accounting firm. Roger had gotten her that job – a position had opened and he’d recommended her.

And now… someone accused her of stealing and it was gone just like that.

“It’s that bitch, I’m telling you. She has it out for me. First my man and now…”

Robby wasn’t so sure. _“Stuff like that can ruin someone’s life”._ He remembered the words but couldn’t remember where he had heard them. But for some reason, they sent a chill down his spine.

Roger would get her job back, Robby was sure of that. They might have broken up, but he wasn’t mean. He wasn’t vindictive. Robby was sure if Mom would just ask…

“That asshole doesn’t even have the balls to face me.” Shannon scorned. “He just had our stuff in box in the yard when I went to pick it up, did you know that? Well, I’m not gonna beg to _him_ for anything. I have more dignity than that.”

She might, but Robby didn’t. No one with dignity would’ve ever done what he did. This was his mess and he had to do what it took to fix it.

He decided to go over to Roger’s after school the next day. Mom would be out looking for a new job and she wouldn’t miss him for a few hours. He’d talk to Roger, explain everything and that would fix it all.

He thought about things a lot that night. And the next day on his way over. 

Roger had lied, but that was okay for now, he decided. He’d lied to make Robby feel better and that was a good thing. Adults – people – did that sort of thing all the time, that didn’t make them bad people.

_But he said a lot of things to make you feel better. And did a lot more. How do you know they weren’t lies too?_

It didn’t matter. He’d figure that out later. He’d talk to Roger, honestly and man to man – no more stupid kid shit. They’ll talk it out and they’ll fix it.

_Is that why you are going? Or are you looking for something else?_

_No, not that. I’m not doing that kind of stuff anymore._

He HAD been embarrassed of his crush. He HAD been ashamed of it. But Roger had made him feel better about it, less ashamed. But that was a lie too. It had to be if Mom talked like that about skanks and sluts shoving their boobs in men’s faces. Sure, Roger had messed up too – grown-ups were supposed to tell him when he was doing something wrong, right? But he was just being nice and Robby still didn’t know when and where he had crossed the line.

Mortified, he went through his memories, each one making his ears burn and face turn red with shame.

He should’ve refused when Roger offered to teach him the grind. That was a clear invitation, right? Roger had to put his hands on his hips and legs and if you let someone do that, it’s like telling them that you want them to touch you more.

He should’ve been less of a creep when Roger was around him shirtless. He should’ve acted more in control instead of sneaking looks. That’s what sluts did, right? Drooled over men to show their interest? Like when he had found those photos. Or when he had walked in on Roger a bunch of times, ogling his naked body – he’d done that on purpose too, salivating and taking it all in. He’d liked looking at him, but he should’ve acted like he didn’t.

And he had liked when Roger looked at him. He had always enjoyed it when Roger sat by the pool, watching him swim. He had wanted Roger to notice him, to comment on how well he swam, on his growing body.

And the messing… playing around… God he’d acted like a five-year old. All the squealing and the squirming, practically rubbing himself against Roger. He had provoked it, every time. He’d liked it. He’d liked having Roger’s hands on him, he’d liked the feeling of resting comfortingly against his chest and it wasn’t just the crush. It’d felt comfortable. But he should’ve known what kind of message that was going to send. He should’ve known not to make comments that would provoke that kind of reaction.

It had been the whole pool thing – he was sure that’s where he crossed the line of no return. He had run around in front of Roger, bare-ass naked, butt bouncing with every step. He had worn those tight shorts and speedos that hid nothing and pretended like they did anyway. He had asked Roger to put his hands on him, to “teach” him how to swim even though he already knew. He had practically shoved his hard-on in his face, every day. What else was Roger supposed to think about that?

He had pretended it was all about learning and trying new things, but who as he kidding? He had liked the attention. He’d needed it. He’d been desperate for it.

He had liked it when Roger complimented his looks and he had enjoyed showing off his body to the camera. _The pictures… Shit. All those pictures. The ones of me in speedos. The ones of me practically humping Roger with my hard-on right in front of Joe. But those were deleted, Roger said – but maybe Roger lied about that too. And then there were others – of him jerking off, him spreading his cheeks and showing off his hole, of him sucking Roger off and covered in cum._ Roger would never deliberately show them off, but if Mom ever found out… If anyone saw them… the shame, the humiliation….

He’d been such a… _whore._ Spreading his legs and moaning and bucking. And the things he had done – with Roger, with Asher, _to_ Asher. He’d felt so proud in the moment, so smart for learning properly and figuring a lot of stuff out by himself. But now…

Robby almost threw up then. The shame of the memory made his stomach clench and his chest heave and he spent a while like that on the side of the road, retching. But then he gathered himself and wiped his eyes.

He would fix this and once he did, he’d never have sex again. He’d do anything to make it right. He’d beg Roger, he’d reason with him and plead with him and if that didn’t work, he’d use threats. Roger had said stuff like that could be misunderstood and Robby could use that to his advantage – but he hoped it wouldn’t come to that.

And once it was done, it’d behave. He’d tell Roger that they can’t do that stuff anymore and he’d avoid being alone in room with him forever. He’d stay out for hours after school, go to the skatepark or the library and he won’t tempt Roger again. He should’ve done that from the start.

And if that didn’t work, he’d… he’d… go stay with Johnny. Johnny didn’t want him around, he knew that, but surely he wouldn’t begrudge a place on the couch if he stayed out of the way. Right?

* * *

Roger did let him in, thankfully. He said Robby shouldn’t be there, but he let him in anyway.

“I just want to talk.”

Roger was quiet for a while and Robby was unsure there to start.

“I thought we had a deal.” Roger said, sounding disappointed. “How could you tell your mom about that?”

“I didn’t.” Robby replied. _I knew this was just a misunderstanding. This can be fixed._

“Then how did she find out?”

“She didn’t. She doesn’t know.” Robby explained. “She thinks… she knows that you are cheating on he-… I mean, having sex with someone else behind her back… but she doesn’t know it’s with me. She thinks it’s someone else, some girl from work. That’s all, I swear.”

“Oh…” Roger looked relieved. Really relieved. He got up and paced around, clearly thinking of what Robby had said. “Oh.. that’s good. That’s really good.” He laughed, “Thanks for telling me dude.”

Robby smiled. _Good. This is working._ “So can things go back to normal now? Can you and mom get back together?”

Roger looked at him, considering the proposal. The he shook his head. “Seems risky. Not worth it.”

The casual indifference with which he said that threw Robby. _Maybe he doesn’t understand._

“It’ll work.” He had a plan all figured out and Roger would see it was a good one. “You can tell Mom that you did cheat on her – but with some other girl. And it only happened once. She’ll buy that. You can apologize to her and she’ll forgive you. She thinks it’s the girl’s fault anyway for throwing herself at you. Then you can go back to dating and you can tell people at work that Mom didn’t steal anything and everything can go back to normal.”

Roger chuckled at something Robby said, but considered the plan anyway. It was a good plan – Robby knew that. Mom would feel better for being right and getting an apology. Roger would feel better after being forgiven. And no one would find out the truth about Robby. Mom would have no reason to hate him. He’d have to live with the guilt of what he’d done, but maybe that was just the right punishment for him.

Roger shook his head.

“Won’t work.” He said. “She already suspects something. She’ll keep a closer eye on me. Random checks. Snooping around. I can’t live with that and we won’t be able to mess around anymore.”

_No – he misunderstood._ Robby was feeling frustrated. _Roger thinks I’m here for myself, but I’m not. Not this time. I’m trying to make this right._

“We won’t do that stuff anymore.” He explained, flushing. “I’ll – I’ll behave, I promise. I’ll stay away from you. As much as I can. I won’t tempt you. I’ll act normal. Stuff like before will _never_ happen again, I swear.”

He didn’t like the way Roger was looking at him. The way a small smile played on his lips. It felt like he knew something, some secret about Robby that Robby himself didn’t know.

“You can’t promise that, kid.” Roger said, gently. “You are a needy little slut and you can’t help being a tease.”

Robby was taken aback. _Why? You knew this already._ But to be called that to face… by Roger… who was always so nice…

“I-I’ll stop that… I swear… I’m sorry and -”

“Robby, stop that.” Roger said firmly. “It’s over between me and your mom, okay? You have to accept it.”

It WAS over. Robby could feel the finality in Roger’s voice. He’d been so desperate, so eager to fix something that he hadn’t seen the truth. There was no ignoring it now. And once he saw that, Robby felt something else rise in him.

“You said you’ll be there for me. Always. You said you had my back.” Robby said, accusingly. He was growing angry now. That lie had hurt the worst. “You said nothing would change.”

“Life is change, kid.” Roger shrugged. “About time you learned that.”

Robby was fuming. He could feel his lip trembling. He hadn’t wanted it to come to this, but Roger left him no choice. And the anger made it easier. _He lied to me. He hurt me. I should do the same._

“I will tell Mom the truth.” He said, as boldly as possible. He couldn’t let Roger sense that he was bluffing. “If you don’t take her back, I’ll tell her everything. I’ll tell everybody.”

He thought he saw a fear in Roger’s eyes and he felt a flash of satisfaction at that. _Got him._ But he must have imagined it, because they were back to being empty again. Roger was again looking at him in that cold and calculating way like he had never done before.

“And who’ll believe you?”

Robby was speechless.

“Look, people know me, okay? That I’m a nice guy. They wouldn’t believe I would do that. And you…” Roger sighed. “Well, you are kind of messed up already. They’ll think you are making up lies to get attention. Or they’ll think that you are a little perv. Like they did with Mark, remember?”

_No, he wouldn’t… he couldn’t…_ “You said you won’t tell anyone about that.”

“I don’t have to.” Roger shrugged. “Everybody knows already.”

Robby shook away his fear. _Don’t let him get to you._ The good thing about no one liking you was that you didn’t have to care anymore.

“I don’t care. I’ll tell them anyway.” He insisted.

“Think this through kid. You really wanna do that to your mom? To yourself?” Roger reasoned. “She’s gonna hate you and then she won’t have anyone left.”

_Doesn’t matter, I deserve it… but she doesn’t._

“And even if they do believe you, you think they’ll blame me for it?” Roger continued. “I mean, since we are talking about telling stuff, you kind of have a history of going after your mom’s boyfriends.”

“No – I…”

“Yeah, you do.” Roger insisted. “You told me all about it, remember? You crawled into bed with Brent. You peeped on Cody and you jerked him off. Even Pierre…”

_No, not him. I never thought about him that way…_

“That didn’t work out the way you expected, did it? You mocked him, you made fun of his masculinity with your jokes. You were hoping he’d show you how much of a man he was, right? But that backfired. You think it was a coincidence he decided to touch you down there? He was giving you what you wanted – just not in the way you wanted it…”

_No I didn’t. I didn’t want that. Not back then. You taught me to like it, to want it. But not before. I didn’t. I didn’t…. Did I?_

“You did the same thing with me.” Roger went on. “All that prancing around with hard little cock. You were practically humping my leg from day one. Just like you did with others. Who do you think people are gonna blame for that?”

_But you said… you explained it…_ “You said it wasn’t my fault. None of it was.”

“I was trying to make you feel better.” Roger shrugged. “That’s all I ever did – try to make you feel good.”

Robby could feel his head swimming. His vision got blurry. He felt like he was going to faint. _You knew all this already… But he lied to me. I was trying to be better this time. I was. I was trying not to mess it up. If he hadn’t lied, if he hadn’t said it wasn’t my fault… I wouldn’t have…_ Faintly, he could hear Roger continue.

“Look, I didn’t lie to you technically. It wasn’t your fault – you are just messed up inside and you can’t help it. Maybe something happened when you were smaller – that’s how these things work, you know? You won’t remember it but it makes you want all kinds of sick stuff. Maybe your dad did something to you…”

_NO! That’s disgusting. Dad would never…_

“Or maybe you tried something with him.” Roger shrugged. “Maybe that’s why he left. Who knows? You can’t help who you are. The best you can do is hide it from people and hope no one sees it. They will see it sooner or later, but that’s the best you can do, okay?”

_No, I’m not like that. I can’t be. I don’t want to be. He’s lying again._

“You’re a liar.” Robby screamed. He attacked him, wildly swinging his fists, not caring about the cast, not caring about his broken arm. “You lie… you lying piece of shit… everything… everything… YOU LIAR!!!”

Roger gripped his hands tightly and held him against his chest. Robby screamed. He struggled to break free. He kicked and he tried to bite. But Roger held him like that, unmoving, until all the fight left him and Robby was left sobbing in exhaustion.

“Hey, it’s not all bad, okay?” Roger whispered in his ear. “I can’t be with your mom anymore but nothing has to change between us. I can still be your friend. I can be here for you, if you like.”

_Was he serious? After everything he just said to me?_ Robby could feel his hand moving down his back. It dipped under his waistband and went lower, right between his cheeks.

“We still have unfinished business, remember?” Roger said softly. “And I always made you feel so good. Always. I know you want to feel like that again.”

His arm loosened around Robby’s chest and he seized the chance to push him away.

“Like I’d ever let an asshole like you fuck me!” Robby screamed.

He turned around and ran out of the door, tears streaming down his cheeks. He ran and ran and kept running until couldn’t run anymore. And then he ran more. He ignored the pain in his chest. He ignored his heart beating in his ears. He ignored that he could barely see where he was going. He ignored the clawing in his throat. He didn’t know how long he ran or where he ended up. He just collapsed on the grass out of exhaustion.


	13. 14-15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty sure you knew this one was coming.

“No way.” Cruz said. “Kid looks like a narc.”

“No way.” Trey replied. “Look at him. He looks like a punk.”

“That’s what I mean, bro. He’s too punk. He’s trying too hard. Gotta be a narc.”

“That right, Robby?” Trey smirked at him. “You a narc?”

“No.” Robby replied tightly. He could feel anger rising in him again. He was always getting angry nowadays – at his mom, at Johnny, at his shitty life, at the world – at himself.

“Hmm…” Cruz held up his hand at Trey. “We’ll see. You got a place, kid? A narc would never take us home.”

Robby shrugged. If they wanted to come over – so what?

“Okay, lead the way little man.” Trey said.

He knew Mom wouldn’t be home for hours. She was always out, “looking for jobs” and didn’t come home until late at night, always too happy to have not found one and smelling of alcohol. Recently it was like she wasn’t even trying anymore.

* * *

Things had been hard for Shannon since her breakup with Roger. Work tough to come by and even tougher to hold on to. _Can’t blame her,_ Robby thought. She’d finally found a good job, something she actually enjoyed and then she’d lost it. He couldn’t expect her to go back to waitressing or bartending and be happy with it. She was always getting frustrated and quitting. Robby wanted her to try harder, stick with things a bit, but he couldn’t say anything.

Not when he knew that was his fault too. He didn’t know how he knew, but he knew. She’d lost that job right after breaking up with Roger and that could not be a coincidence. And since he was the reason for that breakup…

_Things like that can ruin people’s lives_ , those words still sent a chill down his spine.

He wished his mom was around more. If she wasn’t working, would it kill her to spend more time with him? But she didn’t want to and Robby couldn’t blame her for that. _Sooner or later, they’ll see it_.

Mom didn’t “see” it – not yet. Moms were often deliberately blind to stuff like that. But she could sense it, Robby was sure of that. She knew, on some level, that he was screwed-up somehow, that their messed up lives were that way because of him, but she just didn’t want to face it. _That’s_ why she didn’t want to spend any time with Robby.

He still found himself getting angry at her from time to time, even though he had no real reason to.

Johnny was the one he should be mad at. He’d decided that on his fourteenth birthday after waiting all day for a call. He didn’t believe that Johnny had actually done anything to him… he wouldn’t… he couldn’t… Roger was just trying to get inside his head. But Johnny had still left them. Even if Robby had done something to make him leave, he had still left. He should’ve stayed, he should’ve tried to fix things, to fix Robby. If he had, maybe Robby wouldn’t have turned out this messed up. He owed them that much atleast, right? Even if he couldn’t, he should’ve atleast tried.

Johnny had shown up two weeks later, that month’s support check late again and Robby had let him have it. Until that day, Robby had atleast tried to be nice to his father before – tried to talk about things that might get his attention – but not this time. Johnny had said something about being there when they needed him and the dam had broken.

Robby had called him a loser. A deadbeat. A sorry excuse for a man. He had dug deep for every bad thing Shannon had ever said about the guy and rubbed his face in it. It had hurt him. He had tried to hide it, to keep his face blank, but Robby saw it in his eyes and he was glad of it. It had felt… good. Cathartic. Like he had let out all the poison festering inside of him.

It didn’t last long. The poison had come back again and with it, the guilt, but he had stubbornly pushed that down. He wouldn’t feel sorry, not about this. The only thing Johnny ever gave them was some money every month and even that he couldn’t do on time.

Money had always been a problem and it was even worse now. They had enough… but not enough. Between child-support from Johnny, whatever jobs Mom held on to for a while and something extra Robby brought back from doing odd jobs in the neighborhood, they could manage the rent and bills and food. But it barely left anything for anymore.

Robby knew he had to step it up – after all, it was his fault that every relationship Mom had ever had went to shit. He had cost her her chance at a normal, steady life. Roger had been her last chance. The guys she brought back now were either total sleazebags or middle-aged losers with tans-lines on their ring fingers. Neither the type to settle down and give Shannon the life she wanted. So Robby had to do whatever he could to make things a little better.

And he had tried, honest. He had looked for a more regular job. He had even gone to his estranged, step-grandfather. But no one would hire a fourteen year-old, not for long and certainly not for how much he needed.

That was what led him to Trey and Cruz in the end.

He had first seen them hanging around school. They were seniors – or would’ve been had they not dropped out at some point in the past. They still came around a lot to hang with people who could’ve been their friends. They didn’t even look at Robby. Why would they? He just a lowly freshman.

The skatepark was where he talked to them first. Well, “talked” was an overstatement. He had pulled off this really cool trick he had been trying and Trey had looked at him with respect and said “awesome”. After that, they acknowledged each-other with a ‘sup every time their paths crossed. This was the first time they spoke more than a word to each-other.

Those two were always up to… something. Drugs, obviously, but more. They were always the last ones to leave the park and Robby knew what that meant – he hated going back to an empty apartment too. They were always running some kind of scam – cash exchanging hands for no apparent reason. That was the most important thing. They were always handling a lot of cash and Robby needed that.

People would tell him it wasn’t a smart choice, but hey, since when was he that smart anyway. They would tell him he was ruining his future but, what future? He’d already ruined any chance he had had. It wasn’t like anyone could afford to send him to college and he wasn’t good enough at studies or sports to get a scholarship. His only natural talents would’ve gotten him a job as a porn-star or maybe a hooker and that was…. No. Just no. He already knew he was going to end up working blue-collar, just like his dad and right now, even prison sounded better than being like _him._

So, he had gathered his courage, walked up to them and told them he wanted in. He wanted to make some money and he was up for anything. They’d laughed in his face the first time, but it looked like they were taking him seriously now.

* * *

“Nice digs, bro.” Trey said, looking around his apartment.

Robby scoffed. He shuddered to think where Trey must live if he thought this was a nice place.

“This your mom?” Cruz asked, picking up a framed picture. “Man, she’s hot. Total milf.”

Robby snatched it from him, annoyed, and put it back face down.

They acted like they owned the place. Or like they were looking to buy it. They looked through the kitchen cabinets, peeked into the bedrooms, found the remote and turned on the TV before settling down on the couch. Robby had always hated guys like that. It annoyed him to no end. He wanted to tell them to get their feet off the table. _You need them. Just put up with it._

“Got any booze in this dump?” Trey asked.

They did. Robby knew his mom hid the more expensive liquor in her closet, but she always kept a six-pack in the fridge for any guys who might stay over. Robby had never had the courage to try it yet. He had been curious a couple of times, but he was always too worried about her noticing them gone. And with these guys… but the way they were acting, they might open the fridge at any time and take it anyway. Better to just give it to them, right?

He handed them a can each and was about to sit back down when he saw them watching him with matching looks.

“What? Out already?” Trey asked.

“Nah.. man. He’s a goody two-shoes.” Cruz said with contempt. “Right? Narc?”

Robby huffed. He could make excuses, he thought. He could brag that he’d had some already. Or say that his mom would notice it gone. But none of that was going to work with them. If he wanted their trust, he’d have to do this.

Robby hated his first beer. He didn’t want them to know it was his first, so he swallowed it in gulps instead of sips like he wanted to. And then he choked it down when it tried to come back up. They were watching him, he knew. Testing, waiting for him to prove them right. He didn’t and the next few chugs went down easier. He finished his can faster than them and casually got up to get another. When they started ignoring him and talking to each-other, he knew he had proven himself.

Robby nursed his second beer slowly. It didn’t feel so bad now but he knew he'd had his first one too fast and he was feeling the effects now. His head was swimming a little, his vision kept getting blurry if he forgot to focus and his guests’ voices kept fading in and out. He looked at the clock and realized that it had only been twenty minutes. _What are they talking about now? Something about girls and asses?_

Trey was slapping him. “Hey, buddy. You with us?”

Robby shook himself awake. Yes. Yes, he was. Trey jerked his head at the TV. “What’s the code?”

_Code? Oh._ Shannon had put on the parental locks but she had never been particularly careful about it and Robby had figured that out within a week.

“1-2-3-4.”, he said.

They laughed and Robby chuckled with them. Almost immediately, loud moans and grunts filled the air.

Robby focused his eyes on the blinking light at the bottom of the TV. It helped him feel better. More… in-control. The rythmic movements on the screen and the sounds in the background helped him focus a little. So this was what drunk felt like? It wasn’t bad. It wasn’t good either. It felt like… nothing. Numb. Like everything faded away. Like the whole world was on mute. And that was… good? He didn’t have to think so much about his life. And he liked not thinking about it. Maybe.

He focused on the TV next. _Huh?... Right. Porn._ Not that good porn, actually. Robby tilted his head and focused a bit more. Wrong. They were doing it all wrong. The girl sucking cock was just sucking it.

_C’mon, you need to do more. Grab his ass. Fondle his balls. Don’t just pinch your own nipples, do something._

The guy was no better, just grabbing her hair and forcing her to swallow. The girl kept moaning around the cock loudly, but really?

_Seriously, man? You think she actually likes it? How is this supposed to be good for her? The least you could do is reach down and touch her. And the sounds – so obviously fake. That is NOT what real fun sounds like._

Robby turned to see if his companions were actually enjoying this crap. Trey seemed to. His eyes were fixed on the TV and he was palming himself through the jeans. He looked pretty big from what Robby could see. Cruz was… not there. Huh? Had he left? How long ago?

“Beer run.” Trey supplied, without looking away when Robby asked. “Don’t want your mom hassling us for drinking her beer.”

That was nice. Maybe this guys were nice after all. _And ahead of me,_ Robby realized. They were done with their two cans already while Robby wasn’t even halfway through the second one. He couldn’t fall behind. He’d lose their respect and that was important for… some reason. He took another gulp.

He was getting used to this. He was coming down a little. Sobering up? No, it was more like his body was adjusting to being drunk. It was easier to focus now. He could actually see what was going on around him. He could hear Trey talk and understood what he was saying. And he could get out full sentences, albeit a little slurred. By the time Cruz came back with two six-packs, Robby was more or less feeling like himself again.

This time, he found himself joining it. He laughed when they did. He threw in a few “yeahs” and “totallys” and “that’s hots” when it felt appropriate. They seemed to like that… like him. They raised their beers once, saying “To Robby!” and he smiled at that. This was going well. This is how you got along with people. This is how you made…

…Friends? No, that wasn’t right. He hadn’t brought them over to make friends, he’d brought them over to… talk about work. They didn’t want to do that, he realized. They wanted to drink his beer, have a good time and go away. No – that can’t happen. If he was going to get in trouble for this, he might as well get something out of this.

Robby shook his head, trying to clear his mind.

“You assholes wanna talk about work?” He got the whole thing out without slurring once.

“Man, don’t be a buzzkill.” Trey replied. “We are having a good time here.”

“Well, good times don’t pay the bills.” Robby felt clever for saying that.

Trey laughed, but Cruz said, “I’m telling you, dude’s a narc. It’s all work, work, work. He’s wearing a wire, I know it.”

“I’m not wearing a wire.” Robby said indignantly.

“Prove it.” Cruz challenged.

_Prove it? How? Oh, right._ He had seen this on TV. Robby stood up and lifted his shirt, turning around in a full circle. There was nothing to see but bare skin.

“See?”

“Proves nothing.” Cruz scoffed. “They make those things small now. Like really tiny. You could hide in anywhere.”

“Man, you always get paranoid when you get high.” Trey laughed. Cruz was high? How could he tell? “Robby, shut this bitch up.”

_Huh?_ “What?”

“Man, just show him you ain’t wearing anything.”

_Show him how? Didn’t I just do that? That wasn’t enough?_

“How?” He asked.

That seemed to stump them for a while. He thought they were going to drop it now, especially when Trey went back to looking at the TV and palming himself. Then he turned back to Robby.

“Just take off your clothes.” He said casually. “You can’t be wearing a wire if you ain’t wearing nothing.”

Robby heard Cruz snigger and his blood went cold. He felt himself sober up immediately. _Again. It was happening again._ He had gotten drunk this time and that was the mistake. He must have said something or done something to show these guys who he was. He had messed up again and… and…

… And what? What had he messed up? There was nothing left to screw up in the first place. The worst that could happen would be that they won’t let him in on their scams. That wouldn’t be too bad – it wasn’t like he was in anyway. You can’t lose what you don’t have.

_If mom finds out…_ So what? These guys weren’t her boyfriends. She didn’t even know them. Worst that could happen there was she’d stop liking Robby and it wasn’t like she liked him much anyway.

_If people find out… others at school…_ Let them. Not like he had any friends to lose. Let them gossip about him. Let them laugh behind his back. Let them call him names. He had stopped caring about that crap ages ago.

They were looking at his expectantly, waiting for him to say something. Do something. Robby shrugged and whipped off his shirt.

They both sat up now, looking at him with interest. They were laughing quietly, clearly enjoying themselves. _Sure, enjoy the show, assholes._ Robby stumbled back to the chair and took off his shoes and socks next. Then he unzipped his shorts and let them fall to the floor. He stood there in his ratty boxer briefs for a moment. Then he hooked his thumbs in his waistband and pulled them down in one smooth motion. He grabbed his soft cock, stretching it a little, trying to make it look a little bigger. Then he spread his arms and turned around once, letting them both have a good look.

“See? No wire.” He said, as they both laughed.

He stood there like that, arms spread, letting them humiliate him. _I won’t let it bother me. It doesn’t matter anymore._ They did not disappoint. The catcalls came in one after the other.

“Man, that’s some real plump booty.”

“You been holding out on us man.”

“Would you look that?”

“Look at his little cock. My girl’s clit is bigger than that.”

“Did it just move? Think he likes it?”

“Nah… man, don’t wanna see that. Show me that ass one more time.”

“Knew he was a pretty little bitch the moment I saw him.”

Robby took it all without betraying any embarrassment. He was used to it by now. But he had to draw the line somewhere. So when Cruz got up and grabbed his ass, he decided enough was enough. He pushed him back into the couch.

“I don’t need this shit, okay?” He said, angrily. “If you guys don’t wanna let me into your crew, then fine. You can just get the fuck out of here.”

He bent down to pick up his underwear when Trey stopped him.

“Listen, dude, you wanna run with our crew, you need to learn how to take a joke.” He said seriously. “But more than that, you need to follow orders. Do like I tell you. And you need to prove you can do that. You do that and you are in.”

Robby looked at him for a moment, trying to see if he was messing with him some more. Trey looked serious, like he meant it. And Robby had always been good at following orders. He always listened and he learned and he obeyed. He could work hard when he needed to, he knew that. Not that it had gotten him anywhere. _Well, whatever._

“What do you want me to do?” He said, nodding.

Trey smirked. “Get on your knees and suck him off.” He jerked his head towards Cruz.

He’d expected something like that. That’s how it always worked for him. Roger had been right – this is who he was and eventually, everybody saw it. Brent, Cody, Pierre, Mark, Mark’s mom, Roger, Joe – even his dad. They were either too disgusted to be around him after that or they took advantage of that for themselves. Or both. Why should these guys be any different?

He knelt down between Cruz’s legs, ignoring his surprised laugh, “Oh shit. He’s really doing it!”. Odd thing to say. _You knew I would, that’s why you asked in the first place._ He unzipped the shorts and pulled down the faded boxers underneath, tucking the waistband under the balls. _Huh, hairy._ Somehow that didn’t surprise him. His cock was lying sideways, still flaccid, but a little swelled up. The pinkish-red color looked strange over the pale skin and he could see a vein running up the side.

Robby gave it a tentative swipe with his tongue, making Cruz moan. Then he studied it a little, trying to figure out how to handle this.

_This isn’t right._

Robby frowned at the strange thought. What did that have to do with anything? And since when had that mattered? Things with Roger had felt right. Felt good. But they had been so wrong, so what the hell did he know? And this wasn’t about him feeling good anyway. He just had to get this done to impress them. To earn their trust. It was like a job interview and it’d be over once it was over.

_Would it?_

If he handled it right. That was the trick here – handling it right. If he did a bad job of it, it’d go on for hours and they’d end up rejecting him anyway. But if he did too good of a job, he’d be doing it every day, like with Roger and he did not want that. He had to be just good enough, but that was easier said than done. He had to make them think that he knew what he was doing, but he didn’t want to make a thing of it. Act casual. Act bored.

Cruz grabbed his hair and pulled his face towards him. “Waiting for an invitation?”

Robby shrugged. “It’ll be better if you take your clothes off too.”

“Shit. You done this before, huh?” Cruz asked, incredulous. “You a fag?”

“Not a fag.” Robby deadpanned, answering the second question. “ _You_ waiting for an invitation?

Cruz stood up and shed his clothes lightening fast. Robby looked behind him and saw Trey looking at him in amusement and stroking himself through his jeans. He thought about how exactly he should play this.

Things with Roger had been… intimate. Discovering each-others’ bodies had felt new and exciting. He’d really cared for Roger and it’d felt like Roger cared for him back. ( _He did. He must have. Why else would he make me feel so good?_ ). But that wasn’t going to fly here. These guys weren’t looking for intimacy – just to get off.

So kissing was obviously out of the question. And he’d have to be careful where he put his tongue. No rimming or fingering. But using his hands should be fine. Somehow, he knew that he was walking a very thin line – if he made things too “faggy”, their enjoyment would turn to disgust and it’d be over just like that. They would be fine as long as they thought they were using him, but even a hint of a deeper connection was unacceptable.

The cock in his face was still just half-mast as Robby licked at it a few times. It twitched a bit and leaked some precum and Robby licked that off too. Then he swallowed it whole in one go, hollowing out his cheeks and sucking hard.

Cruz fell back with a “Fuck!” but Robby grabbed his hips to keep him in his mouth. He swirled his tongue around it and felt it get bigger and bigger until it was poking the back of his throat. Remembering what he had learned he relaxed his throat muscles and let it go deeper.

_Roger was a bastard, but atleast he taught me some life skills. Atleast the time with him wasn’t wasted._ Robby laughed at the thought and heard Cruz moan. _Right, vibrations._ He growled from deep in his chest to reproduce that effect. He’d thought he might be out of practice but it was like riding a bike – the lessons came to him almost naturally. He scratched Cruz’s chest and rubbed his legs, he fondled his balls and rubbed his perineum. He grabbed his ass, massaged it and used it to thrust the guy deeper in his mouth.

“Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!” Cruz moaned. “Dude, Trey, you won’t.. ahhhh… you won’t believe the things he is doing. Manghhhhh…. shit… he’s done it before. I swear.”

He could feel Trey’s eyes on him, but continued his work.

“Yeah, dude.” Trey almost whispered. “Look at him wiggle that ass around. Someone already made him his bitch.”

_Crap._ He hadn’t meant to do that. It’d just been muscle memory – some lesson ingrained deep in him. And his cock was hanging half hard between his legs. He hoped they wouldn’t notice – it’d give them the idea that he was into it.

No such luck. Trey reached down between his legs and grabbed him.

“Looks like the dude likes it.” He said. “Think you are right Cruz. He is a fag.”

Robby didn’t say anything, he just sucked harder. _Finish it quickly. Make him come. He’ll lose interest after that and then do the other one._

Trey slapped his ass. Robby jumped a little, afraid, but it wasn’t that hard. It just stung a little and then felt warm. _Just like Roger said._ He did it a few more times, watching him bounce and jiggle.

“Man, the kid’s got an ass better than half the bitches I’ve been with.” Trey said.

“He’s got a mouth better than _any_ of the bitches I’ve been with.” Cruz replied.

“What’s that? Like two, including you mom?”

“Hey, fuck yo-unghhhhh.” Cruz thrust deeper into him.

“Yo’, think anybody’s tapped that ass yet?” Trey asked after a bit.

_Shit,_ Robby thought numbly. _This is how it’s gonna happen._

It was pretty ridiculous if you thought about it – the idea that he’d still think of himself in terms of being a virgin. Before, with Roger, he’d imagined it’d be something special. Tender and loving, growing intense by the minute. Roger would pepper him with soft kisses while prepping him slowly. He’d take him to the edge and make him wait a while for the real thing. He’d push in gently, letting him adjust. He’d move slowly at first, pushing against that thing inside him and then faster and faster until he made Robby splatter himself and filled him up inside. In his fantasy, they always came together.

What a dumb fantasy…

This was reality and this is how it was _really_ going to happen – with him being used like a blow-up doll. But if he handled it right, he might just avoid the pain.

Trey’s hand was already between his cheeks, exploring. He felt a finger probe against his hole and clenched hard, not letting it in. Trey massaged his ring a bit and tried again, to no avail.

“Tight. Too tight.” He said. “Don’t think anybody’s been here before.”

“Nah… don’t buy it.” Cruz replied. “Slut like him must have had someone in him before.”

Seemed like they finally realized that they could actually ask Robby about it. Trey grabbed his hair and pulled him off Cruz’ cock. “Which is it? You been fucked before or not?”

Robby shook his head vigorously. “Just fingers.”

“Guess it’s your lucky day then.”

He’d figured as much. Still, he didn’t want any pain. He knew the trick was to act like he knew what he was doing. He pushed Trey’s hand off his hair and stood straight up.

“If we’re gonna do this, we do it my way, got it?” He said as boldly as possible. “I’m not gonna let you hurt me.”

He must’ve looked ridiculous, he thought. Naked, cock half-hard hanging between his legs, lips shining with spit, hair messed up from being grabbed – and yet there he was, giving orders to a fully clothed man half a head taller than him. Trey must have seen it too, because he grabbed him by the jaw.

“You telling me what to do, bitch?”

“With this, yeah. You clearly don’t know shit about what you are doing.” He kept his face expressionless, betraying no fear. “Look, either you do what I say and all three of us can get off – or you guys can get the fuck out of here and _nobody_ gets off. Your choice.”

For a moment, it looked like Trey was going to call his bluff. That he’d just throw Robby down and push inside, making him scream. But Cruz rescued him.

“Listen to him, man.” He said, stroking his wet cock. “He knows what he is doing.”

“Alright little man. How do we do this?”

Robby didn’t betray his relief. _How the hell did I manage that?_ His heart was still pounding and he was sure they could hear it. He felt like he was trembling on the inside and somehow he’d managed to keep it there.

“Right. We’ll need lube. Lots of it and I got that.” His mind raced through the list. “And condoms… you got any?” Trey nodded. “And you gotta be okay with putting your fingers up my ass – and you gotta be patient. You make one wrong move, you make one push without me telling you to and it ends then and there. Got it?”

He didn’t know where all this confidence was coming from, but it clearly had an impact.

“Sure.” Trey replied. “I mean, got it.”

“Okay.” Robby breathed. “We are gonna take it slow now. And… I think I need to be more drunk for this.”

That was a good idea. Not just for himself – he knew these guys wouldn’t pass up a chance to drink even more. Robby took another swig of his now lukewarm beer and went inside to get the supplies.

They put the stuff they needed on the table and sat back to drink and talk some more. Robby took the chance to hammer the details into their heads. These guys did not look like they’d have any control when they were in the middle of it.

“You have to go slow. Like real slow. I mean it. Stop if you feel any resistance. Wait if I tell you to. And if I tell you to pull out, you better do it fast or I swear I’ll bite off whoever is in my mouth at the time.” He took a moment to look at Cruz’s scared face with some satisfaction. “Start with one finger. And don’t just push it in like you tried before. Rub around it a little until you feel it loosen up. And move around a little inside until you find something. You’ll know it when you find it. It’ll loosen me up a little – then use second one to spread it apart. Then do the same with the third. Then you can try your dick. And go slow with that too. I’ll tell you when – if – to go faster. And for fuck’s sake, use a crapload of lube.”

“Whoa…” Trey said. “That’s like… a lot.”

But Robby wasn’t done. He had to make sure of one last thing. “It still might not work. It might still hurt. If that happens, despite you doing everything exactly as I tell you, then I’ll still get you off. And it’ll still feel great, trust me. But if you fuck up… that’s the end of it.”

They nodded and Robby felt a little better. He still couldn’t be sure but it looked like they got it. And that they’d listen. Good. He could do it. He just needed to be drunker.

“How do you know all this stuff?” Cruz asked, still amazed. “Like, did you take a class or something?”

“Or something.” Robby replied. He won’t talk about Roger – not with these guys. He got to work on getting drunk instead.

* * *

Robby finished his second beer and started on the third. He’d turned on the porn again – another good idea. Let them get all primed and ready to burst. They won’t last long that way. _Or they could just finish like that._ He looked at them. _Unlikely._

Trey had taken off his clothes too and the three of them were naked together. Robby saw with relief that he wasn’t as big as he’d appeared through the jeans. He’d heard stuff about black guys and their cocks, but atleast Trey looked average. Like he could fit. Cruz was bigger – Robby saw, now that he was fully hard – and he was grateful that he wouldn’t have to take that. Cruz seemed more interested in his mouth. They were both bigger than him, but he knew he’d grown too and would likely catch up soon.

They were being patient with him, which was surprising. He’d been worried that they might snap at any time or atleast tell him to hurry up. They still might, Robby realized and took another swig. But for now, they were content with watching porn, making comments and lazily stroking themselves.

“Man, if my girl gave me orders like you do, I’d dump her ass.” Cruz said to Robby in between.

“If you actually learn to listen to her orders, you might not be in another guy’s apartment begging for a blowjob.”

Trey laughed himself silly at that.

He wasn’t all bad, Robby thought. Between the two of them he seemed to like Robby better. And his body was hotter. Cruz didn’t have much definition – he looked kinda soft. Trey was pretty cut. He had a skateboarder’s body – lean and defined and little bit muscular. Especially the abs. His cock wasn’t half-bad either – lean and dark like him and slightly curved upwards. The white precum dripping on his dark abs made for quite a contrast.

Robby’s head was swimming again. He noticed he was blinking a lot. And his body felt numb. _Okay. Ready as I’ll ever be._

He stood up and stumbled over to Trey, kneeling between his legs and pulling his hand off his cock. He slurped the balls and swiped along the length a few times before taking him deep.

“Holy shit, man. You were right.” Trey groaned. “Man, the mouth on this thing.”

_That’s right. Cum like this. Cum down my throat and leave my ass alone. Cruz doesn’t care._

Cruz did care a bit, because he felt a hand grabbing his behind. It fondled him a bit. It reached between his legs. It slapped him a couple of times. But it never reached between his cheeks.Robby sucked deeper and harder, using all the tricks he’d been taught. And it was working – Trey was moaning louder, thrusting his hips upwards. _Good. More. Closer. Almost there…_ Then he pulled Robby off his cock by his hair.

“You’re a sneaky bitch, aren’t you?” He said, looking into Robby’s dazed eyes. “Sorry bud, you ain’t getting off without an assfucking.”

Robby shrugged and got up.

Cruz was standing behind him, fondling him, so he pushed him on the couch beside Trey. Then he laid down on top of them both – he put his hips on Trey’s lap, adjust himself so their cocks were touching and put his face in Cruz’s. He reached over to the table to grab the lube and handed it to Trey.

“Start with a finger like I told you.” He said, spreading his legs a little and pushing his ass upwards. And then he went back to lazily sucking off Cruz.

He had to take it slow now, he knew. Trey was obviously not going to let him off the hook and he wasn’t going to let him in without enough prep – so that was going to be a while. Which meant, Cruz couldn’t come quickly either. He didn’t want either of them to be ready for round two by the time he finished with the second. So he had to make Cruz last. Luckily, he knew a trick for that too.

Didn’t mean he couldn’t prime Trey up, he thought as he thrust and moved his hips, rubbing his cock against Trey’s.

He felt Trey’s hands spread his cheeks, exposing his hole to sight and a dollop of spit land in his crack. Trey used his fingers to spread it around, rubbing around the puckered opening and for a moment, Robby was worried he might just push in. Luckily, he remembered his instructions and poured some lube on it before trying. It took some work and some massaging before he loosened enough to let it in upto a knuckle. He still ended up spasming around it and Trey waited for him to relax again before going deeper.

_Okay, it’s working for now._ Trey finally found that thing that made Robby moan around Cruz’s cock. He used it to loosen him up some more and soon Robby could feel a second finger, demanding entrance.

Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. Trey was taking it slow and he did stop every time he felt Robby spasm. There was pressure, but no pain. Not so far. Three fingers in and Robby figured he was ready.

He got off of them and told them to stand on the opposite ends of the couch and while he knelt in the middle. Spitroasting – that’s what Roger had called it when they’d done it to Asher. _Turnabout’s a fair play,_ he could hear Asher smirk. _Payback’s a bitch and now, so are you._

But Asher had liked it. Wanted it. Asked for it. Roger had said so. _Roger lied._ No – Asher had said it too. And he’d have no reason to lie about that.

And Robby didn’t want it. Not like he had. It felt good enough, but it was nothing like Roger, who could get Robby off with just his fingers and leave him a quivering mess. He wasn’t desperate for it, not like Asher had been. But maybe he _would_ end up like Asher after all – all slutty and needy. He had said that it had hurt the first time and that he’d _learned_ to like it.

_Oh God, please don’t hurt,_ Robby begged. _Please, just work._ He could feel Trey’s cock-head press against him while he held Cruz in his hand. The latex felt weird against him. Despite what he’d said, he didn’t really want to bite anyone’s cock off and he wanted his mouth to be free to tell Trey to stop. And Cruz seemed to be fine with that.

He felt the head starting to breach and forced himself to relax, despite wanting to clench. It pushed in, deeper, until it went past the ring of muscle. Trey took it slow, pausing for him to loosen each time before moving in deeper. It took an eternity, but finally he was all in.

_All right._ Robby let out the breath he didn’t realize he was holding. _Time to get to work. Time to finish them asap._

Trey still went slow at first, before speeding up gradually until he was slamming into him balls slapping against his thighs. He’s not gonna stop now, Robby realized, neither of them is. He’d cast his spell of confidence and they’d listened to him for a while, but now it was broken. He was back to being the slut, the thing for them to use. But the spell had done its job. It was uncomfortable, but Robby was staying loose and it didn’t hurt. The occasional, accidental jab against his nub ended up making him hard as well.

Sure enough, the two of them went back to who they were. Cruz grabbed his hair, forcing himself deeper, even though his pubes were already tickling Robby’s nose. Trey slapped his ass and thighs and gripped his hips hard enough to bruise. He felt someone pour beer on his back and his ass and he didn’t know which one did that. He just felt it stream down between his cheeks and down his thighs. He heard them call him slut, bitch, whore…talk about wrecking his hole.

Neither one touched his cock.

But they didn’t last long. Robby was using all the tricks.

Cruz came first, pulling out right at the end and spraying his cum on Robby’s face. _Roger liked to do that too._

Trey came after a while with a deep groan as Robby clenched around him.

They pushed him to the floor after.

“That was pretty awesome.” Trey said, pulling off his spunk filled condom and tossing it aside. “Now finish yourself off.”

Robby sighed and quickly finished himself off, painting his abs with his own come this time.

“So?” He asked, bored. “Am I in?”

Trey laughed. “Yeah. Sure.”

* * *

Robby’s head pounded as he woke up. He had passed out on the couch, still naked, still filthy. He groaned, turning his head to the side. Still dark outside. Still night. Good.

_Shit. Mom._

He jumped up and regretted it immediately.

_Fuck, that hurts. His ass hurts. Why?_ He froze in place, waiting for the pain to pass. _It’s okay, it’s okay, it’s just sore. Just relax._

That wasn’t easy. It only hurt when he clenched but the pain made him clench and spasm. He reached behind himself and slowly rubbed around the pucker until things settled down. He gave a sigh of relief.

_What happened?_ It had been okay last night. It hadn’t felt that great, but it hadn’t hurt either. Why did it hurt now?Fuzzily, he remembered something about what Roger had said. Something about the alcohol numbing the pain in the moment, but you feeling it the day after. _Right._

He looked around. Beer cans were all around him. And the place reeked of sex and booze. He’d have to clean this up before… _Right. Shit. Mom._

It was late, right? Had she come back already? Did Trey and Cruz leave before she did? Had she seen him like this, naked, passed out, covered in cum? Did she see that and just walk out – like Johnny had – never to be seen again?

He grabbed his phone to check the time and saw the message - “Sleeping over at a friend’s tonight. Order dinner. – Mom.”

_Small mercies._ He still had to clean the place up. And himself.

The smell would be the toughest to get rid of, he knew. So he opened the windows to air the place out. He emptied an entire can of air-freshner, especially spraying the cushions before turning them over. He limped around, straightening up and collecting trash. Soon enough, the place was looking clean, except for the smell.

And then he saw it. A condom. As spunk-filled used condom lying on the floor by the couch. He’d already picked up the one that Trey had tossed behind him. Which meant this was a second one. Which meant…

His stomach churned.

_Those assholes. Those fucking assholes._ One of them had fucked him again. He had fucked him after he had passed out. He had fucked him and he had not gone easy. That’s why it hurt.

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._ How could he have been so stupid? He should’ve made sure they left before falling asleep. They were thieves – criminals. And he had invited them to their home. He looked around – _well atleast they didn’t steal anything._

He felt sick. His stomach twisted in on itself. He somehow finished cleaning up and went into the shower, scrubbing himself as hard as possible.

_Well, what did you expect? You pass out face down, ass in air, sloppy used hole winking at them… who wouldn’t use it? You are lucky that you weren’t awake for it_. _Lucky that they atleast used a condom._

_Did they?_

_Sure, the second time, but was there a third? A fourth? Was it just the two of them? They could’ve called some friends over and Robby would never know._

He soaped up his finger and slowly pushed inside himself, digging around, looking to find something. Anything. Any evidence of someone having been there. It came out clean. _Well there is no blood, atleast._

He sighed in relief and scrubbed himself harder until his skin felt and raw and sore as his used backside.

He looked at himself in the mirror before putting his clothes on. His ass was red, but he knew it’d be back to normal by the next day. There were some bruises on his hips, but they’d fade soon enough. The pain in him – well it wasn’t as bad as it had been with Pierre. It’d be fine in a day or two as well. All in all, very little physical evidence of the night and it’d be gone soon too.

_It’s okay. You are fine,_ he told himself as he got in bed, resisting the urge to jump in the shower and scrub some more. They were using him anyway – so what if they used him one more time after he passed out? Not like he remembered any of it. And if he doesn’t know it, then it’s like it didn’t happen. He learned a lesson here. He’d be more careful from now on.

And he got what he wanted out of this – a chance to make some money. So it was all worth it.

He fell asleep sobbing anyway.

* * *

Shannon wasn’t fooled for a second.

“Did you throw a party last night?” She asked when he came into the kitchen. “Invite some friends over?”

Robby wasn’t sure how to answer, so he just shook his head. Shanon rolled right over him.

“The air-freshner isn’t fooling anyone. I can smell the couch cushions and see that they are turned over. The beer in fridge is not the same brand I buy. And I know that you didn’t finish the whole thing by yourself. So…?”

He just stood there, wordless, hanging his head in shame.

“Honey, I’m not mad. It’s okay, really.” She said, smiling. “In fact, I’m glad you are making some friends again. It’s fine to mess up sometimes. Just make sure you don’t end up a drunk like your dad.”

_Would dad let two guys he met that day fuck him from both ends for money?_ Somehow, he doubted that.

* * *

Things with Trey and Cruz turned out well enough. Robby never asked about that night and they never said anything. And they really did bring him into their line of work – equal partners and everything.

They still used him from time to time. They both had girlfriends (no – just girls they hooked up with), but they wouldn’t put out until they bought them something or took them out to dinner. Robby was cheaper.

He once asked them why they didn’t just suck each-other off.

“Can you imagine that ugly mug on my dick?” Trey laughed. “Nah, man, you got the mouth for it. And the ass.”

But it wasn’t that often. Just occasionally. Those guys were completely straight after all. Trey usually went for his ass and Cruz for his mouth, but they did flip around a couple of times. And Robby found that he could take Cruz too. Maybe it was because his ass was bigger now, but he thought he could even take Roger. And he was liking it better. He wasn’t like Asher yet – moaning and begging for it with his legs spread, but it did get more pleasant.

Still, he wasn’t a big fan of it – of how they treated him during it – but it was only sometimes and the money was good and there were no problems. (He still woke up shaking and sweating sometimes. He didn’t know why, but he was sure it wasn’t because of them.)

There was more to their partnership than that, though. They kind of respected him. Or more like they appreciated what he could do for them – beyond just letting them fuck him. Robby had few illusions about them being friends, but it did feel nice to be appreciated for something other than _that._

They quickly made him their front man for the scams. No one could resist that pretty face, they said, and Robby discovered that that was true. He found that he was fine with scamming people. A fool and his money are soon parted, he’d read somewhere – so they might as well part it to him. Everyone in his life had lied to him to get their way – so why shouldn’t he do the same?

Drugs were fine too – if there was a market for it, then why not be the supplier. And since they couldn’t come to school anymore, Robby was able to get that market share for them.

Stealing… that made him uncomfortable. That felt like crossing a line, doing something wrong to someone who had done nothing wrong.

When they got him a job at the country club – that swanky place by the beach where all the rich people hanged out – he was truly grateful. Their line of work was fine, but for some reason, Robby liked honest work and the money was actually good here. But then, they told him their real plan and he got that sick feeling again. Bad enough to actually object. The guy who’d hired Robby seemed nice and he trusted him, so this felt like more than a scam – it felt like a betrayal.

“You got another option, bro.” Cruz suggested. “All those pent-up rich assholes and desperate housewives in that place? Bet your ass would be worth a lot in there.”

“Holy shit, man, you are right.” Trey agreed. “The kind of stuff he can do – that’s worth some real money. More than we can make from selling stolen shit. That’s some good, honest work, right.”

_No. Not like that._ He may be made for this but he didn’t want to be. And he wouldn’t give in to it. Never.

So he had overcome his scruples and done the job. After all, these assholes were so rich that they probably didn’t even miss that stuff. These guys were all like Roger – they just took what they wanted from the world. From him. Why shouldn’t he take something back?

Even so, it was a relief when the manager confronted him and told him he was fired.


	14. 15-16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay - We are catching up to the present in this chapter.

Mr. LaRusso made no sense to him at all. It was like there was something wrong with him – something different from the rest of the world. He didn’t act like Robby expected him to. He didn’t say or do stuff Robby thought he should. There had to be something wrong with him… Or maybe there was something _right_ with him and it was the world that was wrong.

Robby had gone in expecting a sleazebag. That’s what Johnny always said, back when he still gave Robby the time of day. LaRusso was cunning, manipulative, underhanded, lying piece of shit. He stole other guys' girlfriends. And he lied and cheated his way to the top. And it had made sense – he was a car salesman after all and Robby knew what those guys were like, all oozing and slick and talking you into poor choices. But unlike Johnny, Robby didn’t think he’d hate LaRusso for that – he knew from experience that stuff like that worked. So iwhat f LaRusso had succeeded where Johnny couldn’t, how was it that guy’s fault?

He had been ready for it. He was on a mission here and it wasn’t about LaRusso. He thought about letting him in on the plan – LaRusso hated Jonny too, right. He might like the opportunity to mess with him. But that was too risky. He might as well think that Robby was playing him and kick him out. And Robby was committed to this plan and was ready to do whatever he had to. If LaRusso told him to earn his place by getting on his knees or bending over the desk or putting on a show, Robby would do it.

He wouldn’t have wanted to – stuff like that still made his stomach turn and he didn’t find LaRusso attractive anyway. But if that was the price he’d have to pay to see it through… But LaRusso would have to ask. That much Robby was determined about. He knew he had to keep atleast that much dignity. He wasn’t going to shake his ass at the older guy, he’d keep his distance and wait for LaRusso to come to him, asking for a taste.

Except, he never did. No matter how many times Robby steeled himself for it, that never came.

He’d expected it when Mr. LaRusso ran out after him after blowing up at him about the car. “You want your job back? You gotta earn it.” But no – he’d apologized instead. Actually apologized to him even though Robby had been the one who screwed up.

He’d expected it when he offered to teach him “karate”. He’d expected hands all over him, “correcting” his stance, “showing” him the movement, pinning him down as a “lesson”, “punishing” him when he screwed up, “teaching” him how to take the pain…

But it was just karate. Mr. LaRusso barely touched him at all except for correcting the angle of his joints or when he was blocking his fists. He mostly just _told_ Robby the right way to do it. And even when they fought, Robby could feel like the guy was holding back. He didn’t see it until he was better at it, but there was always a hesitation there. Like Mr. LaRusso was making sure that Robby was always ready to block his fist before he actually struck. Like he was actually scared of hurting Robby, even accidentally. Robby had never felt that from anyone – not even Roger.

He’d expected it when Mr. LaRusso had led him to back room of the shop. But that was just full of plants – those little bonsais that Mr. LaRusso loved so much and no one was allowed to touch. But he’d allowed Robby and he’d even left him alone there like he actually trusted him. And even though Robby had screwed them up a thousand times, he never said a world.

“You are the tree, Robby.”

Those words had sunk deep. He may not be able to change himself, but maybe he could change his life for the better. It was like these trees, they grew out in all the wrong places but you trimmed and pruned and gave them the shape you wanted. You didn’t change what it was, it was still a tree, but you could make it “right”. Better.

He decided to prune Trey and Cruz out of his life after that.

He grew more and more comfortable around Mr. LaRusso. Against his better judgment, he started to trust him. And then Mr. LaRusso asked him to come to the woods with him.

_Just like Roger,_ Robby thought. _Draw you in closer. Make you want things you should not want._

But that ended up being the best day of Robby’s life instead – even better than those afternoons with Roger. Nothing happened that day that made him feel the least bit ashamed or embarrassed. Mr. LaRusso never even looked at him like that, like others had. He was impressed with what Robby could do and but he never made a comment on who he was or how he looked.

_Maybe he is just not attracted to me._ Robby thought. But he wasn’t sure what that had to do with it. Trey and Cruz were straight too, but they had no problem using his mouth.

Mr. LaRusso was… pure, somehow. Like he was somehow immune to the nasty thoughts Robby had a way of inspiring in people. That made Robby feel guilty and not just about the lies. People like that should be protected from people like him, lest they get corrupted too. But maybe it wouldn’t be like that. Maybe, instead of him corrupting Mr. LaRusso, he’d fix Robby instead.

…Or maybe it’d end up like Mark. Mr. LaRusso was a lot like Mrs. Walker, with some true kindness and goodwill in them. But even people like that had their limits and once Mr. LaRusso saw what he was… _You can’t change who you are kid. Best you can do is hide it._

But maybe he could change – just enough. Enough for Mr. LaRusso to overcome his disgust when he eventually found out the truth. Enough for him not to see Robby as a danger to his family (ofcourse he’d put them first), let him hang around. Enough to maybe even forgive him.

“He’s just a guy with a lot of demons.” Mr. LaRusso had said about his dad. But Robby knew it applied to him too. He was never going to be like Johnny, he knew that already, but he was still carrying around his demons. The ones that made him want and do all the wrong things. The ones that made him mess things up again and again.

But this, he wanted to do right. Mr. LaRusso said he could change and he wanted to. And he didn’t know how he could ever repay him for teaching him all that, for forgiving all his screw-ups, big and small.

“What do you mean?” Mr. LaRusso asked, with that sad, hurt look in his eyes – like he was hurting for Robby.

_I don’t want to take advantage of you._ “It’s just, you are teaching me so much, even after… everything. Mr. LaRusso, I want to do something to… earn it. To deserve it, you know?”

“But you are already doing it.” He replied with a hand on his shoulder. “You listen to what I say, you learn, you work hard – what more can I ask from a student? Listen, Robby, I’m not expecting you to be perfect. God knows I never was. But you are doing your best and that’s all I care about.”

Was it all that took? Truly? Surely not. He’d always done his best in the past. He’d always worked hard. Listened. Obeyed. But that had never been enough.

So why would it be now? He had to be better than that, right?

* * *

He tried to be. He tried to follow Mr. LaRusso’s lessons to the word. He repeated them to himself like a parrot, trying to internalize them. He still kept messing up though and Mr. LaRusso kept forgiving him.

The anger was the hardest to let go of. It had been the one lifeline Robby had held on to – one that pushed him forward even if it was in the wrong direction. He felt like if he let go of it, he’d just sink in his misery and never come back up. So despite what Mr. LaRusso taught him, he held on to it. Anger towards his mom, towards the unfair world and especially towards Johnny.

That’s where it’d all started after all. Johnny had lied about Mr. LaRusso. But he should’ve expected that. Johnny always lied. Lied about being there. Lied about caring about him. But he couldn’t help it. He was who he was – just like Robby.

That’s what Robby had held on to, all these years. It hadn’t made him any less angry, but it did mean it wasn’t his fault that Johnny left. He just didn’t have it in him to be a dad, to actually care. And as much as Robby hated him for that failure, he was still holding on to a sliver of hope that Johnny might actually try. Robby didn’t realize that until Shannon told him about what Johnny had asked her. He didn’t believe it, not truly, but he thought maybe it was worth looking into. Johnny did seem like he was trying to get his life together.

That’s when he’d seen _him._ That nameless Mexican kid hugging _his_ dad.

Johnny couldn’t find it in himself to be a father to Robby, but he did it for _this guy?_ Why? Was he dating his mom? That still wouldn’t justify it, but it’d be better than the alternative – that Johnny just decided to change his life and be a good father to _someone other than Robby._ Because Robby wasn’t good enough for that, but this guy was.

The guy was pretty good – he had to admit. Robby saw the video, like everybody else. He’d dropped out, sure, but stuff like this still found its way to him, even though it hadn’t happened at his school. And though he didn’t know the story, but four big guys ganging up on a skinny kid – the context was pretty obvious. And he had beaten them all up, singlehanded. Robby had to grudgingly admit that that was pretty awesome. (“Don’t get into fights, Robby” – clearly that didn’t apply to _this_ guy). Robby almost admired the guy…. Almost. If not for Johnny.

It wasn’t just the lie, it was the betrayal. It was making him look like a fool. Obviously this guy had something that made him worth being a father to. He had something that made it worth it for Johnny to turn his life around. Johnny _could_ be a good father after all – just not to Robby. Because he wasn’t worth it. He wasn’t good enough.

That would NOT go unanswered. He’d hurt Johnny for this. He’d make him feel as bad as he’d made Robby feel. If Robby wasn’t good enough to be his son, then he’d show him that he is not good enough to be his father.

Even with Mr. LaRusso’s lessons, Robby found he couldn’t let go of that. He wouldn’t. Even though he knew he should.

But other than that he had tried his best not to mess it up. Like with Sam.

Sam was beautiful in that breathtaking way that made his heart skip a beat. And she was sweet and funny and smart. She didn’t feel like Robby did about her dad teaching karate to some random kid – probably because she knew that she would always come first for Mr. LaRusso. Sam liked him too and for the first time in his life, Robby knew that this wouldn’t be wrong. The LaRussos liked him and he was supposed to date girls his own age. Nothing could be more “appropriate”.

Except for Robby being who he was. If he got close, if they found out what he was really like and what he had done… that just didn’t bear thinking about. It’d be like Mark and the Walkers all over again.

And then there was Miguel. That was another thing that concerned Robby. Sam probably still had feelings for him. If she was heartbroken over their breakup, then wouldn’t it be like Robby was taking advantage of her? He wasn’t sure, but it’d seemed risky.

For a while. He was changing after all and maybe it was okay to give in to your feelings every once in a while.

* * *

It was over. It was over and he was done. He couldn’t fight back anymore. The floor was cold and hard against his face, his arm was wrenched back painfully and a strong hand was keeping him down. No matter how much he tried, he wouldn’t get out of this, not without dislocating anything. Everyone was laughing at him, hooting and hollering and recording his humiliation for posterity. And there was nothing he could do about it. He had lost.

It wasn’t fair. He hadn’t messed up this time. Not like before. He had done everything right. The medal thing was a mistake, but he had told Sam the truth and apologized and she’d forgive him. And he was trying to stop the fight here. He was trying to do the right thing. It wasn’t fair that he should lose.

And not just the fight. Everything.

Mr. LaRusso knew. He knew what Robby was. He’d probably always known. That is why he had freaked out at finding out that Sam had spent the night with him. Nothing had happened but what kind of parent would leave their daughter alone with someone like him. It was Mrs. Walker all over again.

Johnny wouldn’t last long around either. Robby had no illusions about him. Things had been a better this morning after he’d decided to give him a chance like everyone told him to, but now… with this fight, lines would be drawn, sides chosen and it was obvious which side Johnny would choose. He might want to be a father to Robby, but it was obvious he loved Miguel better.

And so did Sam. She cared about Robby, he knew that, but she kissed Miguel anyway because she liked him more. Everyone did.

Miguel was going to take everything from him – Sam, his dad, even Mr. LaRusso who’d would eventually end up liking him when he found out about the medal. Miguel won’t even leave him with any dignity. He’d end up like those bullies on the video, shamed and humiliated and unable to face anyone.

Robby struggled harder. He had lost but he wasn’t giving up. He knew how things always went for him. He knew his punishment would be worse than those bullies. With them, Miguel had just been satisfied with knocking them out. But Robby was a threat – he’d stolen Miguel’s girlfriend and could some day steal Johnny and maybe even his position as the school badass. No Robby would need to be put down, once and for all. And he knew exactly how Miguel would do it.

Miguel would wrench back his arm to dislocate it and the pain would be excruciating. It’d make his vision darken and he’d be unable to move. Miguel would use that chance.

He’d feel hands fumble at his waist, unzipping him and his jeans would be yanked down, exposing him to the whole student body. They’d laugh harder, pointing at his ass. He’d hear whistles, catcalls. And more laughter. He’d try to scramble, get up, but a hand on the small of his back would keep him pinned.

_“Think it’s time we show Sam who’s the real man here.”_ Miguel would growl. _“And who’s the bitch._ ”

He’d hear him spit and feel a wet palm on his crack. Panicking, he’d try to move, but only get a couple of slaps on his cheeks. A wet finger would find his hole and shove in. It’d burn and he’d scream but it’d go in anyway. It wouldn’t matter how hard Robby clenched, it’d still push past the ring of muscle and find its way in.

_“I knew it!”_ Miguel would say loudly. _“Someone’s used this hole before._ ”

He’d use two fingers at most, but he would find the spot inside him that makes him keen. He’d press on it again and again until Robby forgets the pain for a moment and pushes his ass back.

_“Bitch likes a good ass-fucking.”_ He’d say.

He’d remove his fingers then and Robby would feel the blunt tip of a cock pushing against his ring. He’d scream, he’d yell, he’d beg for mercy – but Cobra Kai shows no mercy and Miguel would slam into him in one move.

He’d scream harder, the cock splitting him in two. He’d flail his arm, squirm, try to move, but Miguel would hold him in place with hands gripping his hips. He’d clench, trying to push Miguel out, but that would only make the walls of his channel grip the dick harder. Miguel would moan with pleasure. Then he’d pull out almost completely before slamming back in. Then again and again and again. Going faster until Robby can feel balls slapping against his thighs.

Robby would be a sobbing mess. His ass would get used to the intrusion. And though the pain would still be there, the cockhead jabbing against his spot would make it feel good. And then better. Soon, Robby would be pushing himself back on the cock, pushing his ass into Miguel’s crotch, moaning and keening and whining _“moremoremore”_.

Miguel would laugh, cruelly. He’d grab Robby’s hair, pulling him straight until he is on his knees and let the whole world see his hard cock, bouncing up and down.

_“Look up, bitch.”_ Miguel would say in his ears. _“Open your eyes and see how much everyone is enjoying the show.”_

Robby would obey and he’d see people pointing and laughing – and then his eyes would fall on Sam. She’d look disgusted. His right arm would be hanging useless, but he’d try to cover himself with his left. Miguel won’t let him.

_“She needs to see this too. See what kind of guy she picked. See her mistake in picking you over me.”_

Miguel would grab his dick and start jerking him off. I’d chafe and burn, the dry hand on him uncomfortable, but Miguel wouldn’t stop. Robby would be beyond caring now. He’d bare his neck to victor and Miguel would bite down on it. That would be the last straw. Robby would cum crying, shooting his load all over the floor. His ass would clench around Miguel and send him over the edge too. Robby would feel his insides fill up with hot, wet mess.

Miguel would pull out and push him away, disgusted. Miguel would spread his legs so that everyone would be able to enjoy his handiwork. They’d look at his hole spasm, trying to close, leaking cum and they’d laugh and take more picture. Miguel would then lift him up by his hair, until he is kneeling again and shove his cock in his face.

_“Lick it clean.”_

Robby would have no fight left. No will to resist. He’d open his mouth and accept his tormentor’s dick and lick away all the come on it. Miguel would laugh again and let him fall back after a slap to the face.

_“Used hole up for grabs here, guys!”_ He’d yell. _“Come and get it.”_

Robby would hear people move. Some would grab his legs and drag him along the floor. He’d be afraid, but too exhausted to move….

“Stay down, man” Miguel said. “Just stay down.”

They were still laughing. All of them. And Miguel still wasn’t letting him move.

_Stay down? Who does he think he is?_

Robby knew what that meant – that contempt, that pity. _Did you enjoy your little fantasy? Were you afraid of it or did you want it? I don’t need to do that shit to finish you off. I don’t need to finish you off at all. You think you are a threat to me? That you are my competition? You never stood a chance. Sam, your dad, everything else – it was all mine for the taking from the start. I don’t need to fuck you to make you my bitch because you already are. Sorry Robby, it’s not that I’m better than you, it’s just that you were never good enough._

_No. It can’t end like this. I won’t let it._ Robby forced himself up and felt the grip on his arm tighten.

He heard – felt – a loud crack. Blinding pain came a moment later. He screamed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise Motherfuckers! I just went AU on all yer asses. Didn't see that one coming, didja?


	15. 16 (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay - another big one, also split into parts. No sex in this one.

“I’m sorry.” Sam cried, holding his hand. “I’m so sorry. About everything.”

“It’s okay. It wasn’t your fault.” Robby replied as gently as he could. It was hard to focus. He was feeling woozy, but he could still feel the dull throb of pain in his arm.

He didn’t remember much. He knew he had curled up in pain, crying. He had heard someone yell “What did you do?”. There were hands on him after that, but not like he had expected – they had been gentle. Comforting. He had felt himself being carried. He hadn’t heard any more laughter. He had been carried off on something. There was an ambulance at some point and then flashing lights.And then nothing.

When he’d woken up, Mr LaRusso had been the first thing he saw. “You are okay, Robby.” He was saying in relief. “You are gonna be fine.”

Was it all it took? A broken arm for everything to be alright? For all his sins to be forgiven? If he’d known that before, he’d have cut that thing off ages ago.

Sam was still crying.

“It is my fault. It’s all my fault.” She kissed his hand. “I never should’ve kissed him. I don’t know what came over me. It was just… I was just…”

“Drunk?” Robby supplied.

“Yeah.” Sam jumped on it. “It still never should’ve happened. I never wanted to do that to you.”

Robby nodded. He believed her. Sam was a good person through and through. Not like him. Even if she had feelings for Miguel, she’d still never have acted on them. Not like he had. She’d never do that to him, not if she could help it. But then, it still meant she had feelings for Miguel. _Like you didn’t know that already._

“You still love him.” Robby said calmly.

“No I don’t.” Sam insisted. “I don’t. Not after what he did. I l-love you.”

The hesitation gave it away. She cared about him, deeply. Maybe even more than as a friend. But it wasn’t love. Not yet anyway. Maybe it could be some day, but for now…. And then there was Miguel. He was an asshole, but feelings didn’t go away that easily. Robby knew that from personal experience. As badly as things had ended with Roger, sometimes he still wished he could feel those arms around him.

“It doesn’t work like that.” He told Sam sadly.

She moved in to kiss him, to reassure him, but he turned his head away.

“Sam, I don’t… I think, this was a mistake. “He didn’t want to sound cruel. Did he sound cruel? I thought we could make this work, but things just got so complicated. With Miguel. With Mr. LaRusso. I think we should just cool things for a bit.”

Sam nodded and sniffed.

“I’m not trying to hurt you.” Robby pleaded. “It’s just, when Miguel said you loved him, I just lost it. I wasn’t focused and I couldn’t control myself – I don’t want to feel like that ever again. I don’t want to be that. I still want you to be my friend – you were always a good friend to me. But…” God, he sounded like Roger, taking advantage of a girl’s guilt. “Please understand.”

“I do understand.” Sam sniffed, wiping her tears. “Robby it’s okay. I wasn’t being fair to you and you deserved better. I’m just… happy that you are being this nice about it. I wouldn’t blame you if you wanted to yell at me.”

He didn’t want that. But still, he was feeling relieved. Things would be okay. His head was starting to get clearer.

And then it hit him. He just dumped Sam. _Robby Keene_ dumped _Samantha LaRusso_. The world just didn’t work like that. _Mr. LaRusso’s gonna kill me for breaking her heart._

“No, he won’t.” Sam was laughing through the tears. _Did I just say that out loud?_ “Robby, dad loves you. And he is sorry about blowing up at you before. He said you are coming back and staying with us again.”

He was laughing with her. Smiling. Relieved. Like a weight had been lifted off.

“You are crazy if you think I’ll let you near him!” They heard Mr. LaRusso yell outside the door. Robby strained his ears.

“He’s my son.” A voice replied. Robby could feel the anger there. _Johnny._

Sam was looking at him worriedly and Robby was unsure of what to do. Should he face Johnny? Talk to him? He didn’t want to but… they sounded like they were getting ready for a fight out there. He couldn’t have that.

“It’s okay.” He nodded at Sam. She got up and opened the door, revealing the people outside. Mr. LaRusso looked back and stepped between Johnny and the door.

“Mr. LaRusso, it’s fine.” Robby said quickly, before things could escalate. “Really, it’s okay. You can let him in.” He got a considering look before Mr. LaRusso stepped aside. Johnny came in and Sam walked out behind him, closing the door.

His dad looked wrecked. Face twitching as if in pain. He looked like he was about to cry, like he was the one with the broken arm. His mouth open and closed as if he didn’t know what to say.

_I don’t either,_ Robby realized. Should he comfort him? Say it’s okay. That was backwards right? Things had been better between them that morning, but Robby didn’t know how they stood now. How they should stand. He had fought his student after all, the kid Johnny loved more than him.

“Robby, I’m sorry.”

That was the wrong thing to say. _Sorry? He’s sorry?_ That’s what he’d said the last time, right? After his students had dislocated his shoulder? After he told them to go after it? Or maybe he didn’t but he hadn’t done anything about it. And here they were, back at the same place again. Did he really think saying sorry would fix everything?

Then he remembered. It was always the same with him. Johnny might want to be a good father, but he never actually cared enough for that. Not about Robby. When it came down to a choice, he’d always pick Miguel. His students. His dojo. He _would_ reject Robby again. _No. Not this time._

“I don’t know what I was thinking.” Robby shook his head. “Get out.”

“Robby - ”

“I said, get out.” Robby said more firmly. “GET OUT!”

The door flew open and Mr. LaRusso was there, ready for a fight. But Johnny squeezed his eyes shut and walked out.

* * *

His arm had a spiral fracture just below the elbow and his shoulder was dislocated again. The latter would be fine in a week, the former would take about two months to heal. There were bruised ribs (like Sam) and other bumps but nothing more serious. _Is that all? It’d hurt so much worse._ He had to stay overnight for concussion protocol, but he was back at LaRussos the next day.

The fight was already having repercussions. Tory was expelled and suspensions handed out. Robby wondered why Miguel wasn’t expelled too and Mr. LaRusso agreed – but the school figured that Miguel had _ended_ the fight, not _started_ it. If they started expelling students who ended the fight, most of Miyagi-Do would be gone too. Not that there was a Miyagi-Do anymore. Mrs. LaRusso had put her foot down – _no more karate._ There was going to be a huge PTA meeting to decide how to go forward, but _no more karate._

“It’s not his fault, Mrs. LaRusso.” Robby insisted. “Those assholes attacked _us. We_ tried to stop the fight. _I_ tried to stop it. If Mr. LaRusso hadn’t taught us what he did, things would’ve been way worse.”

But Amanda was adamant. Robby didn’t understand these things, apparently. There were nuances he was too young to get. But this was for the best.

More news came – from Aisha this time. She quit Cobra Kai – and so did Johnny. For a moment, Robby thought his dad had done it for him, but no. His old Sensei had come back – the one Mr. LaRussso had told him about, the monster – and just taken over. The Cobras were reeling from almost completely losing to Miyagis (except for Robby. Figures he’d be the only loser) – and Kreese had used that to win them over. Told them that Johnny had made them soft and he could make them tougher. And a lot of kids had bought that.

Robby felt some sick satisfaction at that. _Now you know how it feels. You picked them over me? Serves you right. How do you like your Miguel now?_

Mr. LaRusso raved for a while. Kreese was a psycho. He could NOT be trusted. They HAD to figure out a way to stop him. Amanda wouldn’t budge – they will, but this time, it’d be _her_ way. And no more karate.

* * *

Miguel came a day later. Robby was reading about the 442nd regiment in his dojo/poolhouse/his new bedroom when it happened. (He wasn’t doing to it impress Mr. LaRusso. Honest. He just wanted to know more about Mr. Miyagi who everybody thought of as a god.) He looked up from his book when he heard Amanda knock.

“Robby, you have a visitor.” She stepped aside and Robby saw _him_ behind her.

_Shit. Miguel. Shit. He’s here to finish me off. To finish what he started._ Miguel was always stronger than him and now with a busted arm…

“Stay away from me.” Robby panicked. _Run. I have to run. I have no chance. No chance._ He looked wildly for an escape route but Miguel was covering the only one.

“Robby, it’s okay. It’s okay.” Amanda was beside him, hand on his shoulder. “Miguel is here to apologize.”

Miguel hadn’t moved and he was holding his arms up in surrender. “I’m not here to hurt you. I swear.”

_Calm down. Calm down. Don’t be such a pussy. He wouldn’t try anything – not with Amanda there. And the other woman. Latina? Must be his mom._

“I…” Miguel seemed unsure of what to say. He looked back at his mom for direction but she just stared back at him, he anger plain to see. She had her arms crossed, eyes narrowed, lips pressed and jaw clenched. She jerked her head towards Robby and Miguel turned back, taking a tentative step forward. “I’m sorry for what I did. For breaking your arm. I didn’t mean to do that. Things just got out of control.”

_Like hell. Is he really trying to say it was an accident?_ “Bullshit.” Robby said softly.

Miguel flinched like he had been struck. He squeezed his eyes shut and nodded. “You’re right. You’re right. I’m sorry.” He took a deep breath and looked Robby in the eyes. “I did want to hurt you. I saw you as the enemy and I wanted to hurt you. And I did hurt you. I was wrong and there is no excuse for that.” He was looking down at the floor now.

_Is he for real?_ Robby looked at him closely. He did seem sincere. He looked ashamed and guilty and like he was about to cry. _Doesn’t mean anything. He doesn’t regret what he did, he just regrets getting in trouble._

“I also want you to know that I’ve been suspended and grounded.” Miguel continued monotonously. “And I’m quitting karate. I won’t be fighting anymore – you or anybody else.”

That did surprise Robby. He’d figured Miguel would’ve been one of the kids who had gone over to Kreese.

“Sensei is pissed at me too. Your dad, I mean.” His eyes peeked up, looking for Robby’s reaction. “He says he can’t believe I’d do that his son. He’s not even talking to me anymore. Maybe he never will.”

That was another surprise. Robby had been sure Johnny would take Miguel’s side. If he was taking Robby’s side then… _No, he is still on Miguel’s side. He’s just angry at him like Miguel’s mom is angry at him. Johnny would forgive him and they’d be like father and son again in no time._

“All that supposed to make me feel better?” Robby asked coldly.

“Yes. Maybe.” Miguel looked like he was in pain. “I just thought you’d like to know that I’m not getting away with it. I know it’s not enough but there is some punishment, right?”

Okay, that _did_ make him feel a little better. Still, if Miguel thought it was enough to earn his forgiveness…

“It doesn’t mean anything to me.” There was venom in his voice. “I don’t want anything to do with you. And neither does Sam.” That was a low-blow and he loved it. “So, just fuck-off.” He hadn’t meant to swear in front of Amanda, but damn, it felt good.

Miguel looked crushed and Robby felt guilty for a moment. But just a moment. _That’s the least he deserves._ He hung his head and turned to go. Amanda patted Robby on the shoulder and stood up to follow him. The woman at the door didn’t move.

“Can I have a moment, please? In private?” She asked Amanda. Amanda looked at Robby for confirmation and then led Miguel out.

“Robby? Hi. I’m Carmen.” She said, once they were alone.

Robby nodded in acknowledgment. _What does she want from me? Does she want me to forgive Miguel? Is she going to tell me that I’m at fault too? That I deserved it and her baby did nothing wrong?_

“I remember you from the tournament.” Carmen went on. “You were really good back then. And I just don’t mean karate. I remember you offered a hand to Miguel. That was nice of you.”

He hadn’t meant anything by it. He’d just felt bad for him for a moment and thought about what Mr. LaRusso would want him to do. He told her as much.

“But you still did it.” She smiled. “And I also heard about you from your father. And Daniel. They all think very highly of you.”

_What is she trying to say? That I used to be nice but I’m not anymore? That I was an asshole to Miguel right now for rejecting his apology? Well, screw her._

“I just wish I had said something to Miguel back then. I saw something there that didn’t feel right and I should’ve done something about it. If I had…” She was sad. Regretful. Why? It wasn’t her fault. “I know it doesn’t mean much coming from me, but Miguel really is a good kid. He has a good heart, deep inside.”

“Yeah, well, come back when it’s outside of him too.” Robby scoffed.

She smiled at that. “He just lost his way a little – but I’ll set him right, okay. He really is sorry for what he did. And… this is none of my business, but your dad is sorry too. I hope you can forgive them both someday.”

Robby looked at her, but didn’t speak.

“And it’s okay if you can’t too.” She continued. “But don’t let my son’s mistake make you something you are not, okay? You are a good kid. Everyone says so. So don’t let it change who you are.”

_Change who I am? What do you know about that? You don’t know me. Loser, liar, bitch, creep, freak – that’s who I am. If you knew that, you’d be telling me to change._ Robby nodded stiffly.

Carmen gave him a last smile and left.

* * *

“That’s entirely up to you, Robby.” Mr. LaRusso said.

_Gee, thanks. That’s a lot of help. I ask you if I should just forgive Miguel and that’s your reply?_

“Look, I’m pretty angry at him myself right now.” He continued. “And I’d like to say that there is no coming back from this. But… he did man up and admit to his mistake. And it does sound like he is trying to be better.”

“So I should forgive him?”

“Eventually.” Mr. LaRusso sighed. “Listen, feelings aren’t that easy to deal with. And that’s okay. You have every right to be angry. There is no clock on this. You can take your time to deal with it however you like. Just… don’t hold on to the anger just because you want to, okay? Don’t let it define you. If you feel like it’s slipping away one day, let it go.”

Robby nodded. He could try that. He had learned how to hold on to anger, but what had that ever gotten him?

* * *

The meeting had its impact. More than an impact. The school was like a prison now. Guards everywhere. Security cameras watching all the time. Patrol cars doing drive-bys every other hour. Students were quieter, less rowdy, giving each-other a wide berth. It won’t last, Robby knew, but for now, everyone was on high-alert. Watching. Waiting for someone, anyone to fuck up…

Well it won’t be him.

He knew this was just a lull. Though Miyagi-Do was dissolved and Cobra Kai not what it used to be, students still threw each-other dirty looks and it was only a matter of time. They had to be ready. And he had friends now. Even with the dojo gone, he finally had people who’d sit with him at lunch, talk to him, hangout. Demetri and Chris and others. And Moon and her new girlfriend. And Aisha…

Aisha had come over to their side. Loyalty meant something to her, she said and she hadn’t liked the way Kreese had snaked the dojo from Johnny. And apparently, she was a good deterrent. She seemed pretty nice and cheerful to Robby, but it looked like she had bit of a rep with the Cobras. One day a Cobra had called out to Robby and he’d tensed, readying himself for an escalation, but Aisha had glared at him and he’d slunk away.

They had more support now and somehow Robby thought things would be okay.

“Easy for you to say.” Demetri complained. “I remember the tournament. You are pretty badass with just one hand. I got lucky the last time. And _Eli_ is coming for me. I know it. He knows where I like to go and where I hang out. He knows where to find me. I need protection, man. Like round the clock police protection.”

Robby smiled at that. Whatever the Cobras were plotting, atleast they weren’t making a move yet.

But Demetri wasn’t the only one being paranoid. Robby felt like that too – about Miguel.

Miguel had left him alone and Robby had done the same. In fact, everyone left him alone. He had no place at their table, not with the glares Robby and Sam threw him everyday. And he seemed to have fallen out with other Cobras too, maybe because he hadn’t switched over to Kreese. He had enough of a reputation that no one would hassle him, but no one was trying to make friends with him either. Robby had seen Hawk talk to him once or twice, but it looked like they were arguing and Hawk had left him alone after that. He usually had his lunch alone.

_That could’ve been me,_ Robby thought once, sympathy bubbling through him. He was angry during the fight too – out of control – and it could easily have been him breaking Miguel’s arm. Or worse. And being left with no friends – Robby remembered what that was like. But he pushed that feeling deep down and stomped it dead. _He deserves it. He deserves worse._

Still, it felt like he was seeing Miguel everywhere. He’d see him in the hallway and Miguel would hurriedly turn around and walk away. He saw him pop into the library every now and then, leaving as soon as he saw Robby there. He saw him through the windows during class. He saw him hanging around the lockerroom after gym class (Robby was excused from the gym because of his arm, but he still had to show up). He saw him milling around the parking lot after school, looking-not-looking at him. He even thought he saw him following them home once or twice – but that was just his imagination.

_You are being paranoid, Keene,_ he told himself. _You go to the same school. Ofcourse you’d see him around. It’s not like you see him peeking through your window. You are letting your fear get the better of you._

Still, he knew he’d feel safer once he got the cast off in two weeks.


	16. 16(2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Violent and graphic rape in this one. Extra trigger warnings apply.

_Stupid. Careless. Moron. Stupid._

Sam had offered to drop him off home before she headed out. Asked even. But no, he just had to stay back and use the library. Lot of schoolwork to catch up on from all the missed time.

“I mean it. Go ahead. Go have your girl-time with the girls.”

School was pretty safe now, right? The guards weren’t everywhere, but the cameras were. Except in bathrooms and locker-rooms. He should’ve remembered that before he went in to pick his bag.

“Finally. Thought you’d never show up.” A voice said behind him, making him jump.

Cobras. Three of them. He didn’t even know their names, he realized. He had fought them before, though. There was the tall, good-looking brunette. The shorter one with longer hair. And the redhead with cropped hair. One-on-one, they’d have been no problem. Even three-on-one, Robby knew he could’ve handled them. But with his arm immobilized with the cast… He’d have to be smart. Keep them off balance. Use the surroundings.

_The tall one would move first – he seemed like the most aggressive. Use that. Kick his leg and when he stumbles in pain, use him as a fulcrum to kick the shorter one. Then go after the redhead. They’d recover, but not at the same time. Keep the fight one-on-one. Keep moving. Don’t let them get behind you. Use narrow spaces to keep them from ganging up or moving freely. And when you see the chance, make it to the door. You’ll be safe once you are in the corridor in sight of the cameras. You can make it…_

But maybe there was a better way.

“You guys don’t want any trouble here, trust me.” Robby said as confidently as possible, hoping they couldn’t hear his pounding heart.

“Not looking for trouble, man.” The short one said. “Just talk. Clear the air.”

_Yeah, right. That’s why you cornered me in the locker-room. That’s why you are standing around to keep me from running. But, if this buys me time to think of something…_

“Okay. Talk.”

“Not us, dude. Someone else wants to talk to you.” The tall one took out his phone and dialed. “Yeah, Sensei, he’s here. Yes. Yes. Okay – here you go.” He said, handing Robby the phone.

_Sensei? Dad? Has he taken Cobra Kai back? And sent his goons to intimidate me?_ But the voice on the other end was definitely not Johnny’s.

“Hey. It’s Robby, right? This is John Kreese. Your father’s sensei. I think you may have heard about me.”

_And then some._ But this didn’t make sense. What did Kreese want with him?

“I want to talk to you about your dad.” Kreese went on. “He’s not doing so well. I mean, he’s not sick or anything, but it’s like he has given up. He doesn’t have a job. He isn’t even looking for one. He stays inside all day. He’s drinking a lot…”

“Yeah, because you stole his dojo from him.” Robby said, still perplexed.

“That had to be done, son. He was leading those kids wrong. I had to save them from him.” Kreese explained. “The whole school fight – that’s where he led them. He lost his way and I thought losing the dojo would be a wake-up call, but it’s only gotten worse.”

Robby knew when someone was serving him some bullshit and this was some grade-A stuff. _Just keep him talking. Look for a way out._

“Go on.”

“I care about your dad a lot, you know?” Kreese went on. “He still is my favorite student. And seeing him like this is just… that’s not where I thought it’d end up. I made a mistake. I want to make it right, but he won’t listen to me. I know you care about your dad too. I mean, he _is_ your dad. Maybe you are still angry at him, but it’s time to make things right, son.”

_Son? Is he kidding?_

“You there Robby?”

“Yeah, just…” Robby thought about it. He was angry at his dad, but he didn’t want this. But this was Kreese. “Just hard to buy this from a guy whose students broke my arm.”

“No – that Diaz kid broke your arm.” Kreese replied. “And he was never my student. I never liked him. I always knew he was bad news. That’s why I kicked him out of the dojo as soon as I took over.”

_Bullshit._

“And _my_ students aren’t hassling you, are they?” Kreese went on. “You know why that is? Because I told them to leave you guys alone. I told them that this war between dojos is over and anyone who steps out of line, gets thrown out on their ass.”

Technically true, Robby had to admit. But he wasn’t fooled for a second.

“So what do you want from me?” Robby asked. He could feel Kreese smiling on the other end.

“I want you to join Cobra-Kai. Once your arm is healed-up. It’s almost there, right?”

_Is. He. Fucking. Kidding? I never joined Cobra Kai when my dad was running it. You think I’ll join for you?_

“I know there is a lot of bad blood here, but that’s why this is important. There is no Miyagi-Do anymore. And by joining us, you can make things right with other students _and_ your dad. You can get him back for us, help him see the light. Robby?”

“I’m listening…”

“Look, I know you must have heard a lot about me. And I get why you wouldn’t trust me. A lot of that stuff is true. I have done a lot of wrong things in the past – but this is my second chance.” Kreese took a deep breath. “All I want to do now is help my students and win some tournaments. Do Cobra Kai right. And Johnny IS one of my students.”

“Can I have some time to think about it?” _Okay, that could be a way out of this situation._

“Yeah, ofcourse. As much as you need.” Kreese sounded pretty casual. “But… Can we meet face to face? I know I can convince you that this is the right thing if we do.”

_Not a chance in hell._ “Ofcourse.”

“Can you come over now? My students will bring you to the dojo.”

_Not good._ If he went with these guys, who knows where he’d end up.

“I got a doctor’s appointment in half an hour.” Robby lied easily. “But I know where the dojo is. I can come over in the evening – about six-ish?”

“Yes, ofcourse. Thanks for giving me the time, Robby.”

Robby handed the phone back to the tall guy. _Please work. Please work._

It didn’t. “Do it.” Robby could barely make out the voice in the phone. He moved first and hoped Mr. LaRusso would understand.

* * *

The shorty was in the middle and immediately put up his hands in defense, but Robby went for a kick to the leg instead. He pivoted on his heel, swinging back his good arm towards where the redhead should be and caught him in the face with his elbow. The tall guy fumbled with his phone with a “shit!” and charged forward to tackle Robby. Robby neatly sidestepped him and brought down his cast on the back of his head. That sent a jolt of pain through him, but the adrenaline coursing through him helped him ignore that.

His heart was pounding, but he was focused. _You can do this. They are staggered. Keep moving. Keep it one-on-one._

They came to him, one after the other, and Robby beat them back, always dancing out of reach. The broken arm was a real hindrance – not only was it barely useful for blocking, but the immobile, dead weight also threw him off-balance. No matter – he absorbed the few hits that got through his defense and gave back twice as much as he got. He ducked and dodged his way through them, looking for a chance. _Just one opening. Just one._

Then he saw it. They were lined up in a way. He swung around, kicking the redhead on the torso. The guy had his his guard up but Robby gathered more than enough force with the rotation. The power got through and he stumbled sideways, crashing into the tall guy, who fell backwards into the small one. With a curse, they all fell down like dominoes and Robby didn’t miss this chance. He vaulted over the bench and ran straight for the door, fumbling with the knob, trying to get out before they could recover.

Locked. _Shit._ And he’d turned his back on them. _Double shit._

One mistake. One opening. That’s all it took.

He felt a weight slam into him from behind, crushing his bad arm between him and the door. That sent another jolt of pain through him, stunning him for a moment. He felt two jabs into his kidneys, accompanied by grunts. He tried turning, but someone kicked out his knees from under him and shorty kicked him in the chest, putting him on the ground. The kicks came one after the other and Robby couldn’t do anything but curl and protect his most vulnerable areas.

The kicking stopped sooner than he expected. He felt himself being dragged by his legs back inside.

“No! No! No! No!” He screamed for help. He twisted and turned, trying to kick out, to find something to grab onto. _Leverage. Just a bit of leverage. That’s all I need._

Tall guy was dragging him up by the collar, a hand snaking under his good arm and wrapping around to the back of his neck in a half-nelson. The redhead stepped forward punching him hard in the solar plexus. It felt like all the air went out of him and edges of his vision got darker. He wheezed and coughed and his legs gave out. He knew he’d have collapsed to the floor had he not been held up. The redhead moved in again but the short guy pushed him back.

“Hey! Remember what Sensei said.” He was telling the redhead. “No real damage.”

“Look at what the asshole did!” The redhead yelled, pointing at the blood streaming from his nose.

_Atleast I got them some_ , Robby thought with some satisfaction. Redhead clearly had a broken nose. He knew the Tall guy’s eye will be black and blue by tomorrow. And Shorty would have a spectacular one on his jaw. But it didn’t matter now. He had no leverage in this position. He’d lost. Again.

“You wanna tell Sensei you disobeyed his orders.” Shorty said. With a grunt of frustration, the redhead backed off.

“You are lucky Hawk’s not here.” Shorty said, turning back to Robby. “Dude’s crazy enough to just kill you.”

“Maybe we should call him over.” Redhead suggested.

“Remember what Sensei said.” It was the tall guy this time. “Hawk stays clean.”

The other two nodded in agreement before turning back to Robby.

“Listen, Sensei told us to go easy on you.” Shorty said. “He really wants you on our team. It’s an honor. And we are here to convince you one way or the other.”

“You made a really compelling argument.” Robby sneered. “Let me make some counterpoints.”

He swung his foot up but it was no use. Shorty was out of range and the Tall guy is ready for it so his grip didn’t loosen.

“How the hell are we supposed to do this if we can’t hurt him?” Redhead complained.

Tall guy grabbed his hair with his other hand and yanked back painfully until Robby was looking up and back at him.

“Sensei said no real damage. No bruises that can be seen.” He smiled. “But we can still dish out plenty of pain. And there are lots of places where no one will see anything.”

* * *

Robby started struggling again even though he knew it was no use. A foot surged upwards, nailing him right between the legs. For a moment, everything went white and then Robby screamed in pain. Tall guy released his hold and Robby immediately clutched his throbbing balls. He fell to his knees, doubling over, coughing and retching. _Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._ He was done. Cupping his balls did nothing to lessen the pain shooting through his body and it felt like the world was swimming around him. He was done fighting, but they were not done hurting him.

_I won’t beg._ Robby decided. Not that it’d do any good. Cobra Kai showed no mercy. _But I still won’t beg and I won’t give in._

He felt a foot on his ass, kicking him flat on the floor. A weight settled on the small of his back, legs on either side of him.

“We learn more than karate at Cobra Kai.” Tall guy whispered in his ear. “Lemme give you few free lessons.”

His Hands cupped under Robby’s chin and pulled him back. Robby screamed. The pressure on his neck and back increased until it was unbearable. Another hand grabbed his hair and made him look up at Shorty.

“Ready to play ball?”

Robby spat in his face. Tall guy yanked back harder and Robby felt like he’d snap him in two. He screamed again. _I won’t give in. Make me scream all you want, but I won’t give in._

Tall guy let him go and Robby sighed in momentary relief. His balls were still throbbing and he was hurting all over. The pain disoriented him, made his vision fuzzy. He didn’t ever realize when he was turned over.

“Let’s see if you wanna lose your other arm.” Tall guy already had his arm outstretched, hands gripping his wrist tightly. His thighs were wrapped around Robby’s bicep and legs rested on his chest and neck. _No._ Robby knew what was coming. He bucked, trying to dislodge the guy and hit his leg with the cast, but he might as well have tried hitting a brick wall.

Tall Guy twisted and Robby screamed. He loosened it at did it again and again, making him scream each time. Redhead took the chance to step between his legs. He lifted them, spread them apart and boot his foot in Robby’s crotch, pressing down hard. They alternated, making him yell in agony each time.

“Ease up, alright?” Shorty said. “Don’t actually break his arm.”

“I know what I’m doing, dude.”

Shorty still looked a bit worried. “He’s screaming a lot. Someone might hear.”

“Then find something to stuff in his mouth.” Tall guy snapped. Then with an evil grin. “Find a pair of dirty jocks.”

“Dude. Everyone’s gone. Nothing’s left here anymore.” Shorty replied.

“Hey Red, pull out his undies and stuff them in his mouth.”

_Red? Is that really his name?_ Robby thought numbly. He felt his anger inside flow away, replaced with nothing. _So this is how it finally happens._ He’d known what it meant the moment the order came. Once they got his jeans off, there would be no stopping this train. And it felt like he had been waiting for – dreading - this day his whole life. He had somehow dodged the bullet so far, but it was finally here and he felt… nothing.

Red was kneeling over him, looking down with a smug grin as he undid Robby’s belt and zipper. Robby put up a token resistance by closing his legs but he barely had any strength left. He felt his jeans being yanked down, stopping to take off his shoes and socks on the way down, before being pulled off completely. Then Red returned to do the same to his boxer-briefs. He felt cold air hit his sore balls and that felt soothing for a moment.

Robby clenched his jaw shut. _I won’t make it easy for them._ But Tall guy twisted his arm again and Red painfully pried his jaw open before stuffing the balled-up underwear inside. Robby could smell the musk and taste his own sweat on them. He tried to cover himself with his broken arm, but the cast held it immobile and he couldn’t reach that far down.

“Don’t think pain works on this dude.” Shorty said, considering. “He should’ve given up by now.”

“You got a better idea?”

“Maybe.” He licked his lips. “Remember what Sensei said – if pain doesn’t break the enemy, shame will.” _Here it comes,_ Robby thought as they looked at each-other in agreement.

Tall guy let him go and hands were back, pulling off his shirt as well. Robby turned to his side, covering himself with his good hand. _Too tired. Can’t even use this chance to get away. Can’t get away anyway. They’ll be on me the moment I move. Can’t even scream for help anymore._ His jaw was starting to ache from staying forced open.

They were taking their shirts off. Then their belts. Red took the chance to whip Robby’s ass with it twice before the others stopped him. Robby didn’t even react. They didn’t take their pants down though – not yet.

Tall guy was on him again, turning him on his front, pulling him by his hips to his knees, spreading his legs apart as far as they’d go. _Fight back. Struggle. Don’t give up…. But what good that would do?_ Robby just let them rearrange him.

_Here it comes,_ he thought as he felt Tall guy get behind him. But no – he wasn’t positioning himself to fuck. He was coming at him from the side, moving his hands over and under, grabbing his feet. What was he - ?

Robby felt himself be rolled over, arms trapped, knees pulled over his head, legs being split apart at the crotch. He found it in him to scream again, but it came out muffled. _A split – that’s what this is._ He realized. _It’s a wrestling move. How do I know that? “_ _I was sure that one of the guys was gonna just walk over, rip my singlet and fuck me right there in front of the whole class.” Who’d said that?_ Robby could remember the words but not where they came from. But here he was anyway, chin digging into his chest, his own crotch almost in his face, ass not only in air, but also spread apart, exposing his hole to them.

_Atleast I’m not hard._ He noticed, thankfully, that his own cock was soft against him.

“Would you guys hurry up?” Tall guy said, straining and pulling Robby apart.

“Hold up a sec.” Shorty fumbled with his pockets and pulled out his phone. “Blackmail. In case this doesn’t work.”

“Dude, don’t get my face in there.” Tall guy said.

“Don’t worry, I got this.” Shorty replied, clicking away. “Let’s make him a pornstar.”

Robby didn’t speak – not that he could have – he just stared at them blankly. _It won’t work. I won’t let it work. You think you are the first? I’m used to this crap now. Even like it. This didn’t break me before and it won’t now._

“Hey Red. Get him there, would you?” Shorty said, making a jerking motion with his fist. “It should look like he’s enjoying it.”

Robby almost broke then. _No, please no. Not that. Don’t make like this. I don’t want to like this._

Red was stroking his cock to hardness but stopped and knelt between his spread legs, looking into his scared eyes. The hands he put on him were gentle, unlike the twisted grin in his face. The bleeding from his nose had stopped and the blood wiped away, leaving red streaks on cheek. _He has a good body atleast._ Robby noticed numbly. Big muscles that almost looked swollen, but not that defined. He was freckled all over and Robby saw that the shaggy carpet matched the drapes.

He played with his sore balls a little, gently massaging them, making the pain feel a little better – then flicked at them making his cock twitch. He spat on his hand and stroked Robby – and to his muted horror, Robby could feel himself filling up. _Did you think you wouldn’t? You’ve always been a slut for a good fucking, no matter who is giving it to you. Just wait till he gets his cock in there – you’ll be begging for it by then._

_No, I won’t. I won’t beg. Not these guys. Roger couldn’t make me and they won’t either._

A finger rubbed his opening and pushed in. Dry. But it didn’t hurt as bad – not like Pierre had. _You were smaller then. And you hadn’t taken as many cocks._ Red spat on his asshole to wet him a little and shoved in two this time pumping them in and out and scissoring them. _It burns. It hurts. Good. Pain is good. It’s making me soft in his hand. They can’t act like I enjoyed it if I’m soft._ But then the fingers found that nub inside him that made him twitch and clench his ass and fill up again. _Does he actually know what he is doing?_

“Oh man, this one’s good.” Shorty laughed, shoving his phone in Robby’s face. “Captures you perfectly, right?”

Robby had to agree. He was bent in half, but you could still see his muscles tensed up and shining with sweat.. His cock was hard in Red’s hand and oozing precum onto his stomach. The other hand disappeared behind his balls, but everyone would know what it was doing. And his face – his mouth wide open and spit was rolling down his chin. And his cheeks were streaked with tears. _I’m crying? When did I start crying?_ And his eyes were wide and shining and full of fear. _I look like Asher had that day. When I told him to lick my cock clean. Will they try that? I wish they would – I WILL bite them off._

_But that won’t change the photo. You’ll still look like a desperate slut._

“Think he’s ready.” Red said, aiming his cock at Robby’s hole. “Hey, let’s make this a video now.” Shorty nodded.

Despite expecting this, Robby still felt a stab of fear in his chest as the blunt head pushed against him. He couldn’t move at all, but he still jerked and wiggled and struggled to get free. He clenched as hard as he could. But it didn’t matter – Red still pushed in and bottomed out in one motion.

Robby screamed into his gag again. It burned worse than any fingers – worse than Pierre. He clenched and pushed, trying to get Red out, but he didn’t even seem to notice. He just pulled back and slammed in again. And again and again. Until Robby’s ass muscles gave up loosened and Red was pistoning in and out with abandon.

“Yeah, make him your bitch.” Shorty laughed, still careful to only keep Robby in frame. Now he had his jeans down to his thighs and was stroking himself off.

“Think he already is.” Red replied without stopping. “Not as tight as he’s supposed to be.”

They all laughed and Red continued. Robby was softening from the pain of the intrusion, but Red rubbed him back to hardness.

_Remember your lessons,_ A voice said. _Clench. Wiggle. Move your ass. Squeeze it out of them as soon as you can. It’ll be over faster that way._

_No, I won’t. Not to them. I’m not giving them an inch of pleasure. Anything they want from me they can force it out._

Red grunted loudly and Robby could feel himself being filled up. He gave Robby’s cock a final yank before pulling himself out. Shorty went next.

“Let him go.” He told the Tall guy. “I wanna do him like a bitch.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. Red can hold him down and you get yourself ready. And take over the filming.”

_Don’t bother,_ Robby thought. He had no fight left in him. He felt himself being turned around and his ass pulled up until he was on his knees. But Red twisted his good arm behind him and pinned his shoulders to the ground. _Miguel did that too,_ he remembered. _He didn’t fuck me though. Even though I thought he was going to._

He felt hands part his cheeks again and a blunt head was pushing in. This time, it went in easy. _Must be all the spit and the cum in me._ It still burned, but Robby barely reacted this time. _He’s smaller than Red,_ Robby realized. _Shorter and smaller. Does height have something to do with it? Does that mean Tall guy is the biggest?_ _What weird things go through your head when you have your face pressed against the cold floor._

The worst was over though, he thought and he could hold on to that. He was lubed up in a way and the pain wasn’t as intense. Even if Tall guy was bigger, he could take him. He could go on for hours now. Let them fuck him as many times as they liked.

_No, the worst is yet to come. Once those pictures get out. You think anyone would want you around after seeing those?_

Shorty finished quicker, spanking his ass as he emptied himself. They weren’t even paying attention to his cock anymore. They didn’t have to. With theirs rubbing that place in him, his dick was swinging hard between his legs.

“Turn him over.” Tall guys said. “I want to see his pretty face.”

He was the biggest, Robby noticed. And thickest too. His curved sideways and Robby could see the veins running along its side.

And he was good looking too. The unruly mop of hair, high cheekbones, the mean look that suited him so well. His body was close to perfect – the corded muscles of his arms, the defined chest tapering down to a six-pack. _Shit, why did I ever think I could take this guy on?_ Any other day, he’d have been spreading his legs for him willingly.

_And apparently, he knows what he is doing._ Robby realized that when he slid into him in a smooth motion and nailed his prostrate the first time. And then kept jabbing it with every thrust. _Use your hands –_ the guy knew that lesson too. He kept stroking his thighs around his waist and pinching his nipples.

“Your face is gonna look pretty covered in cum.” He said, thumbing Robby’s lower lip.

“Shit dude, he’s hard. You don’t have to touch his cock anymore.” Shorty laughed. He was back to recording while Red stroked his softening cock. “Think you were right, Red. Bitch has been used before.”

“Makes you wonder why Sensei wants him.” Red said. “Doesn’t look like Cobra Kai material.”

“Maybe this is what he wants him for.” Shorty suggested. “As reward for us when we do good.”

“What do you say, buddy?” Tall guy asked, gripping Robby’s jaw and making him look at him. “Wanna join Cobra Kai now? You could have this every day.”

Robby wanted to spit, but the gag wouldn’t let him. He wanted to shake his head, but the grip on his jaw was too tight. He wanted to give him the finger but… wait, his good hand was free. He hadn’t noticed.

He swung his fist hard, but Tall guy was ready for it. He grabbed his wrist mid air and slammed it back on the floor without even stopping fucking into him.

“Bitch still has some fight in him.” He laughed leaning in. “Maybe he is Cobra Kai material after all.”

A drop of sweat rolled down his nose and fell on Robby’s cheek, mixing with his own sweat and tears. He turned his head way, but Tall guy grabbed him by the chin and turned him back.

“Look at me.” He said. “I want to see your face when I fill you up.”

_It won’t be long now_ , Robby thought. He knew the signs. He saw those firm muscles tense and quiver. He felt the hips stutter with every other thrust. The cock in his ass felt like it was getting bigger. Expanding.

Tall guy stopped right before he came, hand around Robby’s neck, squeezing. Choking. _He’s gonna kill me._ Robby thought. _I’m gonna be strangled to death on the locker-room floor with a cock up my ass._ The thought made him tense up with fear. He clenched hard and apparently that was what Tall guy was looking for. He came with a deep groan, pulsing and spurting inside Robby.

“So, what now?” He asked, pulling out. Robby’s hole spasmed at the sudden emptiness.

Red was on him, pulling him up by the hair and yanking the gag out of his mouth.

“Now we do it again and again until he begs for us to stop.” He said. “This time, we use his mouth. I don’t think bitch has any fight left in him. But just to be sure - ”

He stopped. They all stopped, Robby noticed. They were all intently listening for something.

Then Robby heard it too. A knock on the locker-room door and the knob was rattling. “Hey, someone in there?” A seemingly familiar voice called out, knocking again.

“Shit.” He heard one of them say. They were panicking now, pulling their pants up and fumbling into their shirts. Red let Robby’s hair go and let him fall back to floor. _They forgot the gag. I can scream now. And someone is right outside the door._

“HELP!!!” He screamed hoarsely with all the strength in him. It still came out too soft, but it was enough. He heard the sound of the door breaking down and moments later Miguel came into sight. He stopped short when he saw Robby on the floor.

_No, not him. He’ll just join them and finish me off._

“What the HELL is going on here?” Miguel yelled, looking at his ex-teammates.

“It doesn’t concern you Diaz.” Shorty said, having finally put on his shirt. “You are not Cobra Kai anymore.”

Robby could see Miguel looking at him again. _It does concern him. I’m his enemy too. He told me so. He’ll want his turn and then he’ll tell my dad all about this. That’s how he can get him back._ Robby tried to turn over to hide himself from Miguel’s gaze, but he had no strength left. So he covered himself with one hand and closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable.

He didn’t know what happened next. There were sounds from a flurry of movement, feet moving fast, punches and kicks thrown, grunts and yells. He heard “Shit” and “Fuck” and “Let’s get out of here”. He heard footsteps running away. And then a soft voice called out.

“R-Robby?”

He opened his eyes to see Miguel hovering over him. He tentatively reached out to touch his shoulder, but Robby tensed and Miguel drew back as if burned. He looked horrified. Aghast. Like he was the one who was… attacked.

“Robby! Shit! Y-you okay?”

Robby felt like smiling at that. _Don’t I look okay?_ But he didn’t have it in him anymore.


	17. 16(3): Miguel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay - the darkness is over. Good things can start happening now!

“Oh my God! Oh my God!” Miguel looked panicked. “Shit! Shit! Fuck-Fuck-Fuck!”

Robby didn’t think he’d ever heard Miguel swear before. It seemed wrong on him somehow. Was he panicking? Why was _he_ panicking? Robby was feeling calmer himself, now that it didn’t look like Miguel was about to attack him.

“Shit! Shit! We need to call…” Miguel was looking around wildly, anywhere but at Robby. “Sensei… Sensei will know what to do.” He fumbled with his phone, already dialing.

_Sensei? Dad?_ “NO!!!” Robby yelled. “Don’t call anyone.”

“Robby, y-you need… you need…” He still couldn’t look at him.

“I said NO, okay?” Robby said, panicking a little now himself. “I c-can’t let them see me. Not like this.”

Miguel nodded, finally getting it. “9-1-1 then.” He said. “They can take you to a hospital and…”

“NO! I said NO-ONE, okay?” Robby shouted. “You can’t tell ANYONE.”

“Robby, you are hurt.” Miguel was finally looking at him. “You need to go to…”

“You owe me.” Robby said steadily. “You said you were sorry for what you did. And this wouldn’t have happened if you hadn’t broken my arm. This is your fault too. So you owe me for that.” It wasn’t true and it wasn’t fair, Robby knew. But he was beyond caring. _I can’t let anyone find out._

Miguel looked trapped, beseeching him with his eyes, but Robby kept his expression cold and firm. Defeated, Miguel put his phone back in the pocket.

“We need to do _something._ ” Miguel pleaded.

Robby nodded, assessing himself. No “real” damage, Kreese had told his students and they’d listened to that, atleast. His body ached all over, but he knew the pain would recede in a few days. Maybe even sooner.

“Nothing’s broken.” He told Miguel. “Just a few bruises. I’ve had worse. I just need to clean up and get home.”

“Robby, you were- weren’t you - ?” Miguel began.

“I was what?” Robby asked, challenge in his eyes.

Miguel couldn’t say the word and he looked suddenly unsure. _He doesn’t know,_ Robby realized _. He thinks but he doesn’t know for sure. And if he can’t acknowledge it, maybe we can pretend it didn’t happen._

Robby gave him a half-smile and stood up. Or tried to. Pain shot through him again as he straightened and he could feel himself falling forward. In a flash, Miguel was there, arm around his waist and the other one on his back, holding him up. Suddenly, Robby realized how naked he still was and how fully-clothed was.

“I just need to get in the shower.” He said, before noticing the cast on his arm. At home, someone always helped him wrap that thing in plastic before he showered. “Oh… I can’t – with this -”

“Maybe I can find something to help?” Miguel offered. Robby nodded.

Miguel supported – more like carried – him to the bench between the lockers and let him sit down easily. He left him there, head in his arms while he looked for something helpful.

_Why did it have to be Miguel? The guy hates me. He’s going to use this – I know it. He’s going to somehow use this to destroy me and take everything from me._

_No he won’t. Because he’s not like you. He’s a better person than you. That’s why everyone loves him._

_Loved him. But now that he has lost everything because of me, he’ll want his revenge._

_No – they still love him. They are angry with him but he’ll win them back over. He doesn’t need to use this to finish you._

“Hey, I couldn’t find any plastic, but I found this.” Miguel was back with a wet towel in hand. “Maybe you can just wipe yourself off now and take a proper shower at home?”

Robby nodded, taking the cloth. He looked at it in bewilderment. He didn’t know where to begin – how to do it. His whole body felt dirty and he felt frozen.

“I can’t… I can’t clean…” He grabbed the only lifeline available to him. “Will you do it? Please?”

“Are you sure you want me to?” Miguel was hesitant. “I mean, are you even okay with me touching you?”

Was he? He wasn’t sure. All he knew for sure was that he couldn’t do it himself. “Please…”

Miguel nodded, taking the towel from him.

_Why is he doing this? Why is he helping me? I’m the enemy, right? He should be laughing. He should be pushing me to the ground and… “_ Don’t you hate me?” Robby asked.

“No.” Miguel shook his head. “I never did.”

“Bullshit.”

“I - ” Miguel shook his head again. “I didn’t really know you. And you can’t hate someone you don’t know, right? I hated who I thought you were, but you are not that guy. I know that now.”

_Right, so you didn’t hate me, but you will. Once you know me._

_You don’t know him either. This is the most time you’ve ever spent with him._

Miguel started with his face, wiping off the tears and the spit and the grime. He ran his fingers through Robby’s hair, smoothening them back into normalcy. Robby closed his eyes and lost himself in the feeling. After the rough hands treating him cruelly, Miguel’s gentle touch felt soothing beyond belief. _I don’t care – I don’t care who he is or what he has done or what he will do. He’s making me feel better now and that’s all that matters._

He did his arms next, lifting them up to go under. Then his back, right up to the top of his butt. He moved back to the front and started down his chest. Robby realized that he was hard again as Miguel moved down. Harder than he had been through the whole… experience. His dick was standing straight up, pointing to the ceiling. It jerked as Miguel wiped his lower abs and brushed against the back of his hand.

_He knows. He sees. What kind of freak gets hard after what just happened? Look at him. Open your eyes and see the disgust there._ But Robby couldn’t see anything. Miguel’s eyes were fixed on a spot on his chest as he finished wiping.

“M-Maybe, you should stand up for the next part.” Miguel said, still not looking at him. “Or if you want to do it yourself…”

“No. It’s fine.” He still didn’t think he could touch himself. He knew he’d breakdown if he tried.

Miguel nodded and helped him up. Robby leaned against the locker and closed his eyes again, praying Miguel wouldn’t try anything. He didn’t. He was quick with wiping down his privates, almost as if he didn’t notice the hardness at all. Then he reached down between his legs.

“Robby…” Miguel said softly, but something in his voice made Robby look at him. He was looking down in horror. _Is he just noticing my boner?_

“What?” He said, looking down as well. “Never seen a hard cock bef-”

Blood on the towel. _His_ blood. From down _there. Shit, shit, shit. Those bastards._ Not just cum and spit but they’d used his blood as lube too. It was just an illusion he’d been holding on to, but they’d taken that too. There was no denying this now. Miguel had seen. And he _knew._

He leaned forward and Miguel was there again, letting him put his head on his shoulder. He put one arm around his waist to keep him steady and reached down behind him with the other. _Here comes more pain._ Miguel just pushed the towel between his cheeks and legs, dabbing up any fluid but never more than that. The kindness of the touch and the sensation from the towel kept Robby hard, digging into Miguel’s clothed thigh.

_Why aren’t you laughing at me? I’m practically humping your leg like a dog here. Why aren’t you pushing me away in disgust?_ He was crying, he realized. Sobbing into Miguel’s shoulder. But Miguel didn’t seem to notice.

“I think it’s all gone.” Miguel said finally. “You can sit back down.”

Robby stopped, suddenly embarrassed. _You are acting like a child. Take a hold of yourself. You can’t act like that in front of him._ He sat back down and tried to get his breathing under control. By the time Miguel was done with his legs, he felt like he had a handle on it.

“Alright. All clean.” Miguel said, trying to smile. “I – uh – I should get your clothes, right? Wait here.”

Robby was feeling better – until he saw the towel Miguel had left beside him. He could feel his heart pounding again. _This is it. This is what I’m going to remember of this day for the rest of my life. A white towel stained with blood and cum from my ass. No – I can’t – I can’t let it end like this. There needs to be something more, something good in this experience. Something to hold on to._

“I need to finish this.” He said pointing at his crotch, as Miguel returned with his clothes. 

“Oh. Okay.” Miguel put his clothes down on the bench and turned around, respectfully waiting for him to finish.

Robby was soft again, now that his touch was gone. He tugged himself, trying to coax it back to hardness. _No. Doesn’t feel right._ _My hands don't feel right on my own body. But his did._

“Could you… help me?” He asked making Miguel turn around.

Miguel looked horrified. “No. Robby, I’m not touching you like that. Not after… not after you’ve just been through.”

“Please?” _Please don’t make me use the guilt card again._

“Dude, no. You are not thinking straight.”

“Ofcourse, I’m not.” Robby hissed at him. “I can’t think at all. I don’t get the stuff going through my head. All I know is I need… something. Something good to happen right now. Something else to hold on to than what just happened. I can’t get myself there but you just made it feel better. Okay? So, just…”

Miguel looked trapped again. “Are you sure?”

“I’m not sure of anything.” Robby replied.

Miguel thought about it and looked around, as if looking for an escape. “Just… just don’t hate me later for this, okay? I’m only doing this to help. I’m not taking advantage of you. Please, tell me you get that atleast?”

_I would never take advantage of her like that,_ Robby remembered. He nodded.

“Okay. Okay.” Miguel considered how to do it. Then he went over and sat down behind Robby, legs on either side of his. He folded the towel so that the stains were hidden and used it to moisten Robby’s dick. It started to get hard almost immediately. Miguel took a deep breath, wrapped his left arm around him and started stroking him with the right.

Robby moaned and leaned back against his chest. _Okay. This feels better._ Miguel was stroking him almost methodically. He was tentative, hesitant at first, but soon found his rhythm. He wasn’t going too slow to torture Robby. Nor was he going too fast to finish it quickly. His grip was firm, but not tight. He used the precum Robby was oozing for lubrication once he started going dry. Every now and then, he thumbed the head to collect more. His other hand was rubbing soothing circles along Robby’s stomach, just above his pubes. Occasionally, Robby could feel a soft kiss on his neck or shoulder, but mostly Miguel just whispered to him.

“It’ll be okay. It’s over now. It’ll be alright.”

Robby moaned and arched, pushing himself back against him and Miguel just held him tighter. _It doesn’t… feel like before. Like others. It doesn’t feel like the heights of ecstasy Roger brought him too. It felt like – like catharsis. Like Miguel was slowly draining the poison out of him._ Agony shot through him again as the first convulsion hit him. He was spurting into Miguel’s hand, but pain and pleasure where coursing through him simultaneously. He was sobbing again, waiting for the mockery to start. But Miguel just picked up the towel and wiped them both off.

* * *

He was feeling better now. More like himself. More in control. Lighter. His head clearer. It still hurt and he was sitting down because of that, head between his knees. He could feel Miguel hover, asking him if he needed anything for the tenth time.

Miguel had helped him back into his clothes, softly tucking him into his underwear since Robby couldn’t stand without an arm around his shoulder and his other one was still useless. He’d then led him out of the locker-room the same way, limping and leaning on him.

“We still need to call _someone_.” He’d said. “You can’t walk home like this and I don’t have a car.”

Robby had thought about it. Mr LaRusso would freak out. So would Amanda. But Sam would be cool. Atleast long enough for Robby to figure out how to deal with this. “Text Sam to pick me up from my phone.” Robby had replied.

“I still think you should tell someone.” Miguel pleaded again. “People will believe you, I know that. And even if they don’t, I can tell them. I can tell them what happened.”

Robby shook his head. “You didn’t see the whole thing – you just came in at the end. They’ll say I wanted it. That I enjoyed it. And they can prove it”

“How?”

“They have pictures of me. Moaning and hard. And videos.”

“I-I don’t think that’s how it works.” Miguel looked unsure.

“Yeah, well, it’s not a total lie.” Robby said. “I did kinda enjoy it and the photos show that.”

“B-but, did you want it?” Miguel asked doubtfully.

“Ofcourse not.” Robby replied offended. “But see – even you had that moment of doubt and you were actually there. I can’t let those pictures get out. I just can’t. Please don’t…”

“Okay. Okay.” Miguel agreed. “I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing here, but… okay. I won’t say anything – to anyone – unless you want me to. Alright?”

Robby nodded, grateful for the kindness. _The kindness you just took advantage of. Not only were you horny after your own… assault, you made him jerk you off. You acted just like Cody._

“Miguel, I’m sorry about how I acted inside.” He said in a rush. No, he couldn’t be like that. “About what I made you do.”

“You didn’t make me do anything.”

“I did. And I… after…”

“Hey. It’s okay. It’s alright.”

Robby took a deep breath. “I just… the way I reacted to the whole thing wasn’t right.”

“Is there a right way?” Miguel asked. “Look, I can’t even imagine what you just went through. I don’t know what the ‘right’ way to react would be. If there is even one. All I know is that you didn’t force me to do anything. And I don’t feel bad about what I did. And… for what it’s worth, your reaction didn’t feel wrong to me.”

Robby smiled at him. _Why? Why is he being nice to me? Even after seeing what a horny slut I am? Why did he save me?_

_Did he save you? Those guys were already done by the time he came._

_No, they weren’t. They were gonna do more. And if Miguel hadn’t come in…_

_Why did he come in, though? Why was **he** the one to come in?_

A horrible thought occurred to Robby. “Miguel, what were you doing there?” He asked. The more he thought about it… “School was over hours ago. Why are you still around?”

Miguel shuffled his feet, looking ashamed. “I-I was waiting around in the parking lot and when you didn’t come out at your usual time, I went in looking for you.”

_Usual time? All those times I saw him around._ “You _are_ stalking me.” Another horrible thought. “Did you plan this? Did you send your Cobra Kai buddies to ra- attack me? Just so you could play the hero?” _Why would he do that? For my forgiveness? Why would he hurt me more if he really wants that? Or is it someone else’s forgiveness he is looking for?_

“No. No… ofcourse not. I would never…” He looked horrified. “Please just let me explain.”

Robby nodded, still skeptical. _If he’s spinning a yarn…_

“I _have_ been following you. Just around the school though.” He took a deep breath. “I knew things with other Cobras weren’t over. And I know how those guys think. They go after someone vulnerable. And you are vulnerable right now – b-because of what I did. So I’ve kinda been checking in, making sure I’d be around if something happened. I’d no idea they’d do that, though. I didn’t think they were capable of something like it.”

Robby shook his head, still skeptical. “Why follow me at all? To win my forgiveness?”

Miguel shook his head. “I just… I feel guilty about the whole thing and I wanted to… make it right? No, I know there is no making it right, but maybe I can make it better?”

Robby believed him then. _Make it right –_ that’s what Kreese had said to him and that had just confirmed to him that it was bullshit. There were things you couldn’t make right, no matter how hard you tried. But wanting to make things better – that was a feeling he was familiar with.

“Okay. Sorry – I believe you.” He said and Miguel looked relieved. “I’m sorry, I don’t know where my head is - ”

Tires screeched in the parking lot as the car came to a stop. Sam was storming, then running towards them.

“GET AWAY FROM HIM!!” She yelled, putting herself between him and Miguel. “What did you do?”

“It wasn’t me… I swear…” Miguel was backing away.

“It wasn’t him, Sam.” Robby agreed. “Really. It wasn’t him. He helped me. H-He saved me.”

Sam looked between them, as if to make sure. Then stepped back, abashed. “I’m sorry. I - ”

“It’s fine.” Miguel said, still looking down. “I’d have thought the same thing.”

“So what happened?”

“Just some guys jumped me in the locker-room.”

“Cobras.” It wasn’t a question. “Which ones?” Robby shrugged. “Robby - ”

“Just don’t tell anyone, okay.” Robby pleaded. “Not your parents, please. I’ll tell them, I promise. Just not yet. It’ll start shit up again and nobody wants that.”

Sam sighed and nodded, but her eyes told him _this isn’t over._ “So how bad is it?”

Miguel looked at him then, with pleading eyes. _Tell her. Please tell her._ But Robby was determined. “Just some bumps and bruises. Nothing that won’t go away in a few days.” The pain was almost gone and he was sure that if he was careful, he could almost walk normally. “I just wanna go home and take a shower right now.”

Miguel helped him up after that and led him to the car. Sam let him, giving him a soft “thank-you” in the process. He turned to leave after putting him in the car, but turned around when Robby called out to him, waiting for him to say something. _What should I say? Thank-you for saving my life? I forgive you? We are good now? You are a great guy after all?_ He deserved all that and more, but for some reason, none of that came out of his mouth.

“This doesn’t change anything between us. Okay?”

Miguel nodded, hanging his head down.

* * *

Robby found the number on the internet that night. Apparently, whoever had built the site hadn’t given access to the new owner. It still had Johnny’s picture on it.

“Mr. Kreese. Robby here.” He said into the phone. “Sorry I can’t make our appointment tonight.”

“It’s okay. I understand.” Kreese said calmly. “Listen, I hope you know that I’d never tell my boys to attack someone. But they are spirited kids. They were just roughhousing.”

“Really? Thought there was another word for it.” Robby laughed. “Maybe we should ask the cops what the right word is.”

There was dead silence on the other end for a moment. “I don’t think you want to do that.”

“No. I don’t.” Robby agreed. “I just wanted you to know that I can. And I wanted to thank-you. You just gave me the nuclear option. Mutually-assured destruction. I just wanted you to think about that – think about how far you can push me before I decide to use it.”

“I see.” Kreese took a deep breath. “So this is a threat? Leave you alone or else…”

“Not at all. Just something to keep in mind. Come at me all you want. Because I’m coming for you, bitch.”

Robby hung up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so here's the deal. I got all the darkness out with the last chapter. The rest of the story is much more positive and it's almost complete. But thematically, it's way too different from what we've had so far. 
> 
> So, I'm ending this story here and continuing it in a different one. I want it to stand on it's own as well, so the first few chapters would be the same as the last few here. And the references to this story would still be there, but I'm hoping to put enough background information so that it wouldn't confuse anyone. 
> 
> So see you there.


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